Hilda Bauer

Amazing work by Ruby Payne provides clear insight on the issues around poverty

Revisado: 05-10-23

I was introduced to her work briefly in a professional setting as part of a seminar provided by my employer. Following the seminar I purchased the audible book and listened carefully for clues about to better assist clients I serve. Miraculously I found myself engaged in a forensic dive into my own life history finding explanations and skill building for improving my own life. As an adult child born of two parents who were born into rural poverty and climbed their way into middle class here in the United States, she offered concrete information about how the process affected my own upbringing. I identified the gifts and the challenges of my own personal experiences beginning with communication styles experienced: both informal and formal register, styles of handing money and difficulties in managing my own business success which brought cultural challenges and changes to my Life experience.

Generational poverty is difficult to break from but it can be done.

The insights offered in her work and the discussion around brain developmental stages offered insight which led to identifying a need for skill building if I am to maintain a middle class lifestyle that I can pass onto my future family, i. e. children and grandchildren.

She is also careful to identify the very personal and unique categories of poverty experiences.

My husband immigrated from Cuba with his mother and sisters as refugees from the onslaught of the Castro regime in the 1960’s. His father (a doctor) and his mother (well educated in boarding schools and also a college graduate) both hailed from upper class well educated families and found themselves forced into situational poverty due to political upheaval and the need to leave their home country. His father was not able to pass the medical board here in the United States due to the language barrier further complicating their social and economic distress. Nevertheless they were able to navigate their way into upper middle class through hard work and passage of time. Payne’s work helped me understand the contrast in my parents climb out of poverty and my parents climb out of poverty provided economic equality for he and I when we married but the social capital was vastly different and originally created marital challenges due to “personal style”. Listen carefully to Payne’s description around poverty, middle class and wealth and the question of “Could you navigate successfully in a different economic class?” for wonderful examples of how this works. She addressed the contrasting outlooks on food, housing, handling of money, possessions, vacation planning, career and so much more.

I began listening to this work to increase my understanding and skill sets in working with clients and in fact I did achieve that goal. Even more, and as a bonus, I acquired a rich understanding of ways to further improve my marital relations. Wow!

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A must read!

Revisado: 01-21-20

This book helped me rethink how I’ve been doing life. The world has changed and my old strategies didn’t work any longer.


Thank you Dr. Phil

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