Coming up on this episode for Flirtations, we welcome Natalie Lue, the host of the Baggage Reclaim Sessions podcast and the author of five books, including The Joy of Saying No, to have a conversation with us about people pleasing!

Natalie is a leading voice on boundaries and people-pleasing, helping people understand how their emotional baggage interferes with their ability to live authentically.

Together, we'll delve into what people-pleasing truly is and explore the five distinct styles of people pleasing Natalie identifies: gooding, efforting, avoiding, saving, and suffering.

We'll discuss how people-pleasing often originates from childhood experiences and how it manifests in our adult relationships, particularly in dating.

Natalie will shed light on why people-pleasing can be a significant barrier to genuine intimacy and the importance of embracing conflict as a natural and sometimes necessary part of healthy relationships.

We'll also examine societal norms, the ways we’re socialized, and how the era of obedience have influenced our tendencies to people-please, and why understanding and respecting differences—rather than merely mirroring others—is crucial for authentic connections.

Finally, we'll explore the vital role of boundaries in breaking free from people-pleasing patterns and how to recognize and change these behaviors to foster more fulfilling relationships.

So, if you're ready to change your people pleasing habits and create more fulfilling relationships, this episode is for you!

Let’s do this Flirties, and meet Natalie!

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About our guest: Natalie is a writer and artist who’s authored five books, including Mr Unavailable and the Fallback Girl, Love, Care, Trust and Respect, and The Joy of Saying No (HarperCollins/Harper Horizon, Jan 2023).

Natalie has been inspiring and teaching people online for over 18 years, and founded Baggage Reclaim, a popular self-help blog and podcast The Baggage Reclaim Sessions (3 million + downloads) aimed at helping people break the patterns that block them from being in loving relationships and having healthy self-esteem.

Natalie's on a mission to help as many people as possible to help themselves to quit people pleasing, a toxic habit that erodes our mental health, sense of self, relationships, creativity – everything.

You can connect with Natalie on Instagram and learn more about her books and work on her website.

About your host: Benjamin is a flirt and dating coach sharing his love of flirting and BFE - big flirt energy - with the world! A lifelong introvert and socially anxious member of society, Benjamin now helps singles and daters alike flirt with more confidence, clarity, and fun!

As the flirt is all about connection, Benjamin helps the flirt community (the Flirties!) date from a place that allows the value of connection in all forms - platonic, romantic, and with the self - to take center stage.

Ultimately, this practice of connection helps flirters and daters alike create stronger relationships, transcend limiting beliefs, and develop an unwavering love for the self.

His work has been featured in Fortune, NBC News, The Huffington Post, and Yoga Journal.

You can connect with Benjamin on Instagram, TikTok, stream the Flirtations Flirtcast everywhere you listen to podcasts (like right here!), and find out more about working together 1:1 here.