🎙️ Podcast Summary: "Flashlights, Fartandles, and Found Families"

This week’s episode is powered by caffeine and chaos, courtesy of our sponsors: Blindside Beans—because if you can't see straight, at least you can sip straight—and Alan’s Fartandle, capturing the essence of regret in wax form. Oh, and don't forget Gersh’s Mullet in a Minute—for when life demands instant party mode—and Jesse’s Spite Water, hydrating your soul with delicious vengeance.

In our Blind Item Review, we investigated a compact, sleek companion that fits in your glove box and lights up your world with the push of a button. No, it’s not a pet ferret in LED pajamas... (Just don’t test it on your cat unless you want to awaken the ancient wrath of Whiskers.)

Fun Fact of the Week: Mitch once entered a hot dog eating contest thinking it was a seminar on “compressed meat economics.” He placed second, gave a TED Talk, and now holds an honorary degree in Sodium Resilience.

Blind Joke? Of course:

"I told my friend I had 20/20 vision. He said really? I said, '20 steps, 20 toes… and I bump into every one of them.'"

We deep-dived into The Old Guard (2020), a Netflix hit based on the graphic novel by Greg Rucka. We explore immortality, the weight of memory, and what it means to be a hero in a world that forgets. Fun trivia: it was the first superhero film directed by a Black woman—Gina Prince-Bythewood—and hit 72 million views in four weeks.

On the audiobook side, we checked in with Beware of Chicken 4 by Casual Farmer, narrated by the always-excellent Travis Baldree. Think cozy cultivation meets Ted Lasso—funny, warm, and sneakily profound. It’s a story where chickens might be more legendary than warriors.

For our Would You Rather segment, we went deep:

Would you give your life to heal others… or live pain-free and powerless to help?

And if you were immortal, would you keep fighting for good in a forgetful world… or finally rest?

And finally, in honor of strange victories, we discussed the Great Emu War of 1932, when Australia declared war.

🎬 Next Week's Watch List:

The Fall Guy (1981) – A stuntman-turned-bounty hunter who punches bad guys and physics in equal measure.

Videodrome (1983) – David Cronenberg’s twisted dive into media, flesh, and the horror of VHS brainwaves.

So hydrate with Spite Water, and remember:

Whether it’s business in the front or chaos in the back—this show’s got you covered.

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Show Sounds:background:

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Voices:

Jesse and Richard

any other voices, unless otherwise noted, are from www.Elevenlabs.io

"Eyes Unnecessary, Laughter Guaranteed!" on each and every episode!

https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/the-unseeing-critics/episodes/SOS-Books-Stories-Too-Short-for-Pleasure-e2maphr

Music provided by Sharod