If you’ve ever watched your child shut down during homework, meltdown before school, or freeze up in an exam—even though you know they understand the material—this episode is for you.

You’re not imagining it. And your child isn’t being dramatic, difficult, or defiant. What you’re seeing might be anxiety showing up in the body—often long before they have the words to explain what’s wrong. Today, I’m diving deep into what anxiety actually looks like in children, how it differs from simple nerves, and most importantly, how to build a calm, supportive environment so they can show up as their best selves.

As a tutor and cognitive behavioural therapy specialist, I’ve supported hundreds of families navigating school refusal, big emotions, exam stress, and neurodivergence—and I’m bringing that lived experience right to your earbuds today.

00:00 - What anxiety really looks like in children From meltdowns and stomach aches to refusal and rage—how anxiety hides in plain sight.

03:00 -My own story: 11 schools and a whole lot of bathroom floor cries Why my childhood anxiety fuels the work I do with families today.

08:00 - Nerves vs. anxiety: the key difference parents often miss Plus the one question that helps you tell them apart instantly.

13:00 - The “Flip the Lid” Brain Science Model A child-friendly, research-backed way to explain anxiety and overwhelm (your new favourite dinner analogy).

18:00 – The 3-Layer Toolbox for Tackling Anxiety ✔️ Body Layer: Breathing, grounding, and the Butterfly Hug. ✔️ Mind Layer: The 4Fs for managing spiraling thoughts (facts, focus, feel, flow). ✔️ Environmental Layer: Rituals, sensory supports, and safe spaces.

33:00 – Real Parent Story: How R went from shut-down to self-regulated This bright child with OCD tendencies reclaimed calm—and connection with his family.

55:00 – The Transition Timeline Tool A simple before/during/after reflection strategy to prepare for transitions (like back to school).

• 🎁 The Guide To Unlocking Calm
• 🧰 Bettering Youth Website - Emotional literacy, family meetings, and well-being resources
• 📷 Follow us on Instagram - Weekly breathwork + mindset tips
• 📥Join the Newsletter - Get skimmable, practical tools for student wellbeing straight to your inbox

Final Thoughts

You don’t have to be the fixer. You just have to be the calm.

Whether you’re building a worry box, practicing breathwork together, or helping your child name their emotions—you are already doing more than enough. You are showing up. And that’s the game-changer.

✨ If this episode helped shift something for you, share it with another parent navigating a tricky patch.

🔔 And don’t forget to follow the podcast on Apple Podcast or Spotify- we drop biweekly episodes packed with tools, stories, and support for families like yours.

And if you're looking for something more visual, come join me on Youtube for accompanying video and behind the scenes episodes.

Until next time: You bring the tea. I’ll bring the tools. 💛

If you’ve ever faced those quiet tears at bedtime or mornings that feel like walking on eggshells, this episode is for you. We’re diving into emotionally based school non-attendance (EBSNA):

what it is,

why it happens,

and what you can actually do to support your child.

Too many parents are being told their child is “just being lazy” or that they “need more discipline.” But here’s the truth: this isn’t about laziness-it’s about distress. And your child is not broken.

I’ve supported hundreds of families through this; and in this episode, I want to help you understand what’s really going on beneath the surface and where to start when everything feels like too much.

They're invitations- tools to experiment with, starting from exactly where your child is, not where someone else says they should be.

If you’ve ever thought:

• “I just want my child to be okay again.”
• “It feels like I’m failing because I can’t ‘get them’ to school.”
• “I’ve tried everything. Nothing’s working.”

You’re not alone! This episode is your gentle guide toward hope, regulation, and support.

• ✅ Downloadable Checklist here! A visual checklist of strategies mentioned in this episode—designed to revisit and reflect on when you need a gentle nudge.
• 📍 Our community: Want access to more support and resources? Subscribe to the newsletter or join us over on Instagram @TheMindfulToolbox_Podcast
• 🎵 Song Mentioned: Healing is not my purpose

No matter what your mornings look like right now, please hear this: you are not alone. And your child is not broken. There’s hope. Even if progress feels slow or messy.

You’re doing better than you think. And we’re in this together.

✨ Quick favor? If this episode resonated with you, please screenshot and share it with a parent who needs the reminder that their child is not broken and neither are they. Follow us for biweekly episodes, practical tools, and real talk from someone walking beside you.

Sarahlynn

You know your child is bright, kind, and capable, so why are they crumbling at school?

Whether it's constant meltdowns, missed days, or being labeled “difficult,” you're stuck between fighting for support and holding your family together. If you’ve ever typed “how to help my anxious child at school” or “how to get an EHCP”, this podcast is for you.

Welcome to The Mindful Toolbox Podcast, where I blend coaching, mindset tools, and 10+ years of frontline experience to support families navigating emotional overwhelm and educational complexity.

I’m Sarah-Lynn Hodder: teacher-turned-coach, emotional regulation strategist, and your podcast host. In this foundational episode, I explain the heart behind this podcast, the real stories that brought it to life, and what to expect moving forward.

[00:30] Why this podcast matters now more than ever—and who it’s really for

[02:50] When school refusal turns your home into a crisis zone—and why this behavior is actually communication

[04:10] Why emotional safety is the key to motivation, focus, and long-term success

[05:20] My journey: from burnt-out teacher to personal trainer, coach, and SEND tutor

[06:50] Why we’re done pretending that school refusal is just about behaviour

[07:30] The power of understanding anxiety in the body—and how it transformed how I work with kids

[11:50] Topics coming soon: emotional literacy, school avoidance, and how to build trust back at home

If today’s episode made you feel a little less alone, please share it with another family who’s facing the same silent battles.We’ll be here every two weeks, tackling the real-life challenges of parenting kids who think, feel, and learn differently.

Follow along for practical tools, compassion, and clarity you can trust.

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