Hey everyone—We’re diving into a topic that gets tossed around a lot but rarely unpacked in a way that actually matters: self-care. If you’ve ever felt confused or overwhelmed by what self-care really is (and isn’t), this is for you. In this episode, we unpack the myths, call out the cultural noise, and get real about what it truly means to care for yourself, especially during midlife.

We talk about the difference between real self-care and the performative kind, and how embodying your values, setting boundaries, and nurturing self-compassion can actually refill your tank. We’re sharing personal practices, therapeutic insights, and a whole lot of laughter as we redefine what it means to be replenished. It’s not spa days and wine nights (though, we won’t judge if you enjoy those too!). Get ready to reframe self-care in a way that truly supports the life you’re trying to build.

Episode Highlights:

[0:02] - Welcome back + intro to real self-care vs. cultural hype.
[1:13] - Why “self-care” can feel like a loaded or empty word.
[2:06] - Breaking down faux self-care and the influence of marketing.
[4:28] - The truth about performing femininity and hustle culture.
[7:45] - Defining escapism vs. true replenishment.
[10:40] - Tuning into your inner needs and building self-awareness.
[12:44] - Real self-care is simple: boundaries, balance, connection.
[14:59] - The power of self-compassion and Kristen Neff’s work.
[18:41] - Our own self-care routines and mindsets.
[24:17] - The role of creativity and play in replenishment.
[29:22] - Why unstructured time is essential.
[30:27] - Struggles with attention and learning to do one thing at a time.
[31:06] - Rediscovering the joy and nourishment of reading.
[32:24] - Final reflections + practical takeaways.

Resources:

Midlife Master Class Waitlist: insightsfromthecouch.org

Kristen Neff’s Self-Compassion Work: self-compassion.org

Make sure to visit the “Resources” page on our website www.insightsfromthecouch.org to download the worksheet and take ways that accompany each episode. This is hugely important as we are now creating a download that is unique to each episode and working hard to create an email list to support our programming offerings moving forward.

In this episode, we're taking a closer look at the science (and soul) of happiness—not that shiny, fake, “good vibes only” stuff, but the real-deal, research-backed version. After attending a powerful talk by Harvard professor and happiness expert Arthur C. Brooks, we came back buzzing with insights, and we couldn’t wait to break it all down for you.

We’re exploring what happiness actually means—spoiler: it’s not just about smiling all the time—and how much of it is actually within our control. From the surprising role of genetics to the transformational power of habits, transcendence, relationships, and creative work, we’re sharing key takeaways and offering practical, therapist-approved strategies to help you create a more meaningful, joyful, and resilient life.

Episode Highlights:

[0:47] - Our field trip to see Arthur C. Brooks live and why he's the happiness guy.
[1:37] - The surprising science: 50% of happiness is genetic—wait, what?!
[4:44] - Redefining happiness: Enjoyment, satisfaction, and meaning.
[6:11] - The real meaning of pleasure (hint: not just wine and cheese nights).
[9:10] - What satisfaction really means and why feeling effective is everything.
[11:12] - Meaning-making as a mental health superpower.
[13:06] - Resilience and post-traumatic growth: Turning lemons into lemonade.
[16:46] - Grappling with life’s big questions: “Why are you here?” and “What would you die for?”
[19:20] - Transcendence: Spirituality beyond religion and finding awe in everyday moments.
[22:27] - Flow state magic: What gets us into it (spoiler: puzzles and cleaning included!).
[27:51] - The #1 predictor of happiness: Relationships and why they matter so much.
[30:17] - The power of community and intentional connection.
[31:25] - Finding purpose in your work—however you define it.
[33:41] - The art of the “active dabble” and why it’s okay to not know what lights you up (yet).
[35:49] - Wrapping with wisdom: Radical responsibility and the risks of autonomy.

Resources:

• Arthur C. Brooks
• Download the “Risks of Autonomy” worksheet and other episode resources at insightsfromthecouch.org

Make sure to visit the “Resources” page on our website www.insightsfromthecouch.org to download the worksheet and take ways that accompany each episode. This is hugely important as we are now creating a download that is unique to each episode and working hard to create an email list to support our programming offerings moving forward.

How do we create deep, secure, and lasting relationships—not just in romance, but in parenting, friendships, and even with ourselves? In this episode, we sit down with Tara Boothby, psychologist, author of Love and Love’s Energy, and expert in attachment science. She takes us on a journey into the heart of connection, breaking down the complexities of attachment styles, emotional safety, and the power of co-regulation.

We explore the difference between being loved and lovable, how attachment wounds impact our relationships, and why true security is something we earn over time. Plus, Tara shares her own evolution from skepticism about attachment theory to fully embracing what she calls “love science.”

Tara Boothby, Registered Psychologist, and Author of "Love and Love's Energy: How Attachment Science Proves That Love Nurtures Our Biological Nature, Impacts Our Positive View of Ourselves, of Others, and of God, and Teaches Us All How to Love."

Episode Highlights:

[00:03] - Welcome! Introducing Tara Boothby & the power of attachment science.
[02:23] - How Tara went from doubting attachment theory to embracing “love science”.
[04:26] - The truth about attachment styles: It’s not as simple as you think.
[06:36] - What it really means to be securely attached (hint: it’s a process, not a label).
[09:20] - The hidden fears behind our relationship struggles.
[14:02] - Co-regulation vs. self-regulation: Why we heal faster in relationships.
[19:25] - The importance of repair in relationships & why small moments matter most.
[32:02] - “Earning” security: Can we heal from past attachment wounds?
[40:26] - Knowing when to press pause (or end) on unhealthy relationships.
[50:11] - Loving yourself: The foundation of all secure relationships.

Resources:

• "Love and Love’s Energy" can be found on Amazon worldwide, Kindle, and Barnes and Noble.
• Instagram:
  • Tara Boothby: https://www.instagram.com/tara_boothby/profilecard/?igsh=anpwbGs1eXMwaHVl
  • Sojourn Psychology: https://www.instagram.com/sojournpsychology/profilecard/?igsh=MTZ5azlsYjJjZG9sbg%3D%3D
• Website: https://sojo.ca/
• YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/@SojournPsychology
• 🔥Get Clear on What You Want in Your Sex Life: Free Download!

For more on this topic visit our website insightsfromthecouch.org If you have questions please email us at info@insightsfromthecouch.org we would love to hear from you!

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