Almost a year ago and just shy of 7 years of being together, we made a decision to de-escalate our non-monogamous relationship. It was met with a lot of questions and concerns from close friends and family - are you breaking up? Do you no longer love each other etc. We even recorded a special podcast on this topic - (S1. Ep 16) Is It Time To Deescalate My Relationship - and there were still some skeptics.

And now, over 365 days later, reflecting on this experience, we know it was the absolute right decision for us (even though there were some tough spots to navigate) and has in fact strengthened our connection!

In this deeply personal episode we catch you up on what prompted the decision, how we felt at the time, how it went and how things are now!

We also review what de-escalation means and how it differs from breaking up, and the types of situations that might prompt this kind of change in a relationship.

And for those who don’t intend on de-escalating, or stop living together, we share examples of how you can breathe more life into your relationships by spending intentional time together and creating space and time to restore your own independence.

Exciting news: As we announced in this episode we are considering running a Spring cohort of our Polyamory Mastery group coaching program—but we need at least 5 couples (or individuals) to commit to make it happen.

This is our deeper dive group coaching experience for people who are looking for real transformation, and support that actually makes a difference in creating secure, satisfying and sexy non monogamous relationships!

This program includes:

• 8+ in-depth modules of training with brand new content, all of which will be recorded and added to the course site
• Downloadable tools and exercises so you can actively apply the training to your unique relationship(s)
• And of course live coaching with us!

You can find out more about the program here - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery and to apply, drop us an email at tara@hello.taraandandre.com.

To get a bit of background on where we were when we decided to do this we suggest you catch up on the podcast we recorded and listen to our Poly Diaries journal entries from last year! See links in the show resources below.

Show Resources:

• Book a 15 minute call with Tara at https://go.taraandandre.com/15mincoffeechat to talk about Polyamory Mastery or email her at tara@hello.taraandandre.com
• Season 1 Episode 16: Is It Time to De-escalate My Relationship? https://open.spotify.com/episode/0MGkEmWemnQRg1fDNjFQtk?si=A6reBvLbRs-cCQft5GbLow
• Tara’s Poly Diaries entry - ⁠https://youtu.be/NQvmI5WXIsE?si=DLSRQLA1K-Q7WvX⁠
• Andre’s Poly Diaries entry - ⁠https://youtu.be/AS8NkrKYj3A?si=OAlAPqCCEfEOo_A0⁠

• Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠
• Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠andreturcottepsych@gmail.com⁠
• Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

We’re back with another episode in our T&A Alphabet Series, where we explore the big topics around non-monogamy, relationships, and sex—one letter at a time. Originally broadcast as a live training in our Let’s Talk Polyamory private Facebook community, this episode is all about the letter I: I is for Insecurity and the 3 Things You Can Do to Feel More Secure.

Insecurity can show up as self-doubt, anxiety, or the sense that you're vulnerable to harm or rejection. In open or polyamorous relationships, it often feels like living on high alert—waiting for the next fire to put out.

In this episode, we dig into the connection between insecurity and jealousy, and share three key practices to help you feel more grounded and secure:

1. Introspection – exploring the roots of your jealousy and insecurity
2. Communication – both with yourself and with your partners
3. Determining remedies – identifying what you actually need to feel safer and more supported

We also explore:

• Why insecurity is often more about internal narratives than external realities
• How to tell the difference between real concerns and the stories we tell ourselves
• Ways to shift out of recurring insecurity loops
• How limiting beliefs can feed insecurity—and how to build a “positive evidence stack”
• Powerful self-reflection questions to uncover the source of your insecurity
• Examples of real remedies that have worked for us and our clients

If jealousy and insecurity are keeping you from feeling at ease in your consensually non-monogamous relationships, check out our self-paced Poly Newbies Digital Course https://courses.letstalkpolyamory.com/polynewbiescourse or go deeper with our Open Relationship and Polyamory Mastery - https://go.taraandandre.com/polyamorymastery - program, which includes live coaching with us.

Show Resources:

• Practicing Polyamory Podcast - Asking Questions Can Change Your Life with T&A episode - https://youtu.be/lpd_5FwDRxc?si=AqagOShSzkQeTCgt
• Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: ⁠https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue⁠
• Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: ⁠andreturcottepsych@gmail.com⁠
• Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠⁠

Non-monogamous relationships can offer joy, freedom, and deep connection—but they can also stir up intense emotional waves.

In honour of Mental Health Week in Canada, this heartfelt and practical episode explores what it really looks like to care for your mental health while navigating non-monogamy.

Whether you're facing overwhelm, burnout, comparison, or jealousy—or just want to feel less alone—this conversation is for you.

In this episode we cover:

• Common emotional and mental health challenges in non-monogamy
• Why you don’t have to be “fully healed” or “totally secure” to do this well
• Mental health-boosting habits: self-care, alone time, personal boundaries, check-ins, and rest
• When and how to reach out for support—and what kind of support you might need (coaching, therapy, or DIY approaches)
• How we support each other through emotionally tough times

💛 Special episode resource: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health: Worksheet + Action Planning Guide — a free tool to help you reflect, reset, and take practical steps toward improving your mental health and your relationships! Get it here 👇 https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/mentalhealth

This episode is your reminder: struggling doesn’t mean you’re doing it wrong—it means you’re human. Seeking support is a sign of strength.

Please share this episode with someone who might need it.

If you’re considering self-harm or harming others, please reach out to a local crisis line, call 911, or go to the nearest emergency room. You are not alone.

Show Resources:

• Free Download: Non-Monogamy and Your Mental Health: Worksheet + Action Planning Guide - https://worksheet.letstalkpolyamory.com/mentalhealth. You can download and print it and fill it in or use something like PDF Guru to upload and fill it in (https://pdfguru.com/app)

• Book a complimentary coaching consultation call with Tara at: https://go.taraandandre.com/relationshiprescue
• Email André to arrange a complimentary therapy consultation at: andreturcottepsych@gmail.com
• Let’s Talk Polyamory Facebook Group & Community - ⁠⁠https://www.facebook.com/groups/letstalkpoly⁠⁠
• Polyamory-Friendly Professionals Directory - https://www.polyfriendly.org/
• Psychology Today - Search for Therapists, Treatment Centres and Support Groups - https://www.psychologytoday.com/ca/therapists - this is the Canada link but you change the country in the top upper right hand corner.