Cat Humor

Poor Dick and Sally. It's cold and wet and they're stuck in the house with nothing to do...until a giant cat in a hat shows up, transforming the dull day into a madcap adventure and almost wrecking the place in the process!

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.

Sticking their noses where they are most definitely not wanted. Despairing of their humans, these pets take it upon themselves to solve the cases they see as only cats and dogs can. Whether they sniff out the clues or fool the criminals into thinking they are harmless pets to be ignored, Rex, Amber, Buster, and more enjoy escapades a plenty in this fun collection of short stories. Grab your copy and be ready for the fur to fly! Includes: Police Dog - Day One Amber's Bust The Little Lost Dachshund Hell Cat Hell Hounds The Clown, the Witch, and the Cat The Case of the Missing Pasty

This is my last chance to show my epic evil awesomeness and prove to everyone at Camp Mwhaaa-haa-ha-a-watha that I totally deserve the Evil Emperor of the Week crown! Luckily, this week's Evil Celebrity Judge is Dr. Cyberbyte (the Evil Cybernetic Mega Millionaire Inventor), who just gave an interview in Evil Scientist Magazine about his plan to make sure every evil scientist has an evil sidekick pet!

Read all of Cindy Blackburn's Cozy Mysteries for FREE with Kindle Unlimited! Small sleuth, tiny town, unfailing fun. Welcome to Lake Elizabeth, Vermont, where the water’s growing colder, the leaves are turning orange, and Cassie Baxter is going nuts. Who wouldn’t go a little nuts with this latest unexpected development? Meet five-year-old Truman Tripp. Cassie, who is most definitely not a kid person, can’t understand why his mother left the child with her. But some even more perplexing problems soon present themselves, and Cassie’s already Looney Tunes life gets even loonier. Expect...

Ra the Mighty is Pharaoh's Cat, Lord of the Powerful Paw. He is not Ra the Royal Babysitter. How's a cat supposed to fit in all his snacks and naps when his charges keep getting into mischief? Ra's new job only gets harder on a voyage up the Nile, leading to a fearsome palace where crocodiles swarm the waters. Then Pharaoh's son disappears. Has he run away? Has he been eaten by crocodiles? Has he been kidnapped, or worse? Ra and his fellow Great Detectives, Khepri and Miu, set out to discover the truth, but the palace is home to many secrets.

Pete the cat can't actually talk to his owner, Alex, but he's a crime-solving cat, and he knows when things aren't right. And now, Pete knows something is wrong. Someone's been breaking into houses in the neighborhood, and they're not just stealing people's property—they're kidnapping pets! When the burglars come to Alex's house, they nab Pete! Lucky for Pete, Alex's brother, Benjie, comes to the rescue, but gets himself kidnapped by the thieves. Can Pete and Alex uncover the clues and rescue Benjie?

Aspiring potion-witch Isabella Proctor dreams of a normal life away from magic. But when she stumbles upon her mentor's lifeless body, her world turns upside down, and a simple life seems far from reach. Suddenly entangled in a murder investigation, Isabella finds herself the prime suspect in the eyes of the newly-arrived Detective Palmer. Juggling a failing apothecary, a grandmother who sees people that aren't there, and a police department inexperienced in solving murders, Isabella must use her wits and magic to clear her name. With danger lurking around every corner and her freedom on ...

The Heritage Hall book fair was my chance to showcase my bookbinding techniques. Instead, I become the main suspect in a murder. Paper flowers and leather bindings filled my Heritage Hall book fair booth. This was my chance to showcase traditional bookbinding techniques. Instead, I found a dead authenticator in my space. Mark Henderson, known for exposing forgeries, lay sprawled among tools stolen from my exhibit. Making me the prime suspect. Book preservation is my passion - being a murder suspect, not so much. I teamed up with Fitzgerald, my Maine Coon cat and journalist Jennifer Walsh to...

She should say no. She’s not a detective after all. But how can she? When Felicity Philips receives a panicked call from an old friend, there simply isn’t a way that she can turn him down. Edward, the jeweller to the crown, is in deep trouble and he cannot tell the police. His terrible truth must be kept secret. But what is his motivation for calling Felicity? Does he really believe she is the only one who can help? Or are his motivations more personal and dark than he is letting on? With her usual cast of supporting misfits, Felicity is going to see what she can do … … but when she...

With only 199 days to deal with the lich, Florence must take the dungeon she calls a home on the road and eliminate the source of the lich’s power: infected dungeon cores. Whether these infected cores will become enemies or allies remains to be seen, but they aren’t the only threat Florence and her friends will face. Others will seek to use Florence’s unique nature for their own gain or destroy her for what she has become.

The Cat-astrophic Old West No animal in the Old West was more revered nor more reviled than the domestic cat. Sought for their rodent control, but despised for their nocturnal noisemaking, cats lived a schizophrenic existence on the American frontier. In Cat Tales of the Old West Spur Award-winning author Preston Lewis brings frontier felines into the light of the 21st century with a collection of amusing and eclectic excerpts from dozens of 19th century frontier newspapers reporting on pussycats west of the Mississippi River. Through a selection of poems, puns and articles from period news...

What happens when a first-rate bigot tries life as a cat? Catnap takes a gentle swipe at middle-class England and scores a knockout. Expect pathos, black humour and the wickedest of anti-heroes. Sophie K James is the pseudonym of a writer popular in an unrelated genre.

That’s what Pete thinks as he piles the pie high with his favorite topping - pepperoni. But then his friends come over and add their own toppings to the pizza. Will Pete’s perfect pizza be ruined? There’s only one way to find out!

Pete uses his groovy crayons to draw lots of things, and for the first time ever, he’s drawing his pals. But when Pete shows his artwork to his friends, they don’t react the way he expected them to. Will Pete put his favorite crayons down or find a way to turn it all around? Get artsy with everyone’s favorite blue cat in this groovy story that adds a creative touch to the importance of great friends and never giving up. Fans of Pete the Cat will love watching him take his positive outlook and transform something ordinary into an awesome masterpiece!

Marriage? It can be absolute murder. The royal wedding looms and Felicity can think of little else … until a member of her dream team is arrested for attempted murder. Doris, a long-time friend and superstar florist, stands accused of attempting to kill half a dozen brides, their bouquets poisoned with an unknown toxin. Ordered not to interfere by the hateful Chief Inspector Quinn, Felicity is determined to find the real person behind the bizarre crimes and clear her friend’s name – Doris must be innocent, right? But Felicity is not exactly known for her sleuthing skills. If anything,...

I'm Kat Smith, former Secret Service, current postmaster, and awkward private eye in Ohia, Maui. I'm currently searching for a valuable, historical Hawaiian Christmas ornament gone missing, and I’m the six-foot-something center of controversy as our cozy small-town island mystery swirls with gossip, accusations, old feuds, and new friendships. I have my hot pilot boyfriend Mr. K, the Red Hat Society, and my beloved one-eared cat Tiki on the case—but I’m going to need all the help I can get to find the Queen's Ornament, or the fundraiser organized by my very own Aunt Fae will be a bust...

When Mrs. Teaberry telephones Mr. Putter to tell him about a brilliant idea, he gets a little nervous. Besides, sometimes her ideas involve "running fast or wearing feathers." Mrs. Teaberry wants to take an afternoon train ride with Mr. Putter and their pets, Tabby and Zeke. Mrs. Teaberry hasn't ridden the train since 1938, so when they get to the train station, she is surprised to find that pets aren't allowed to ride. Now it's Mr. Putter's turn to think of a good idea.

When there's trouble in town, it’s up to Pete the cat's alter ego, Super Pete, to save the day! With his cool jet, nifty goggles, and slick slingshot, Super Pete is ready to take down any bad guys.

DO YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE CATS?? -- Did you know they played a huge role in British history? Like to know more...? This funny, informative book has tons of fun stories and fascinating trivia that cat lovers can't get enough of... It tells you EVERYTHING you might like to know about how cats shaped British history and culture... DID YOU KNOW? -- Winston Churchill sneaked his cats smoked salmon under the table at state dinners? -- Margaret Thatcher bought her cat sardines in Moscow – during the Cold War? -- The Queen loved to draw cats as a child, but her allergies make her avoid them now? -- ...