Dragon Fantasy Humor

Schlangweilig? Nicht mit dem NEINhorn und Marc-Uwe Kling! Diese Ausgabe enthält als Bonus einen exklusiven Live-Mitschnitt von Das NEINhorn und die SchLANGEWEILE - von Marc-Uwe Kling vor Publikum gelesen im Mehringhoftheater Kreuzberg. Das NEINhorn und die KönigsDOCHter, die hatten einen Streit... aber beide wissen nicht mehr, worum es geht. Als sich der NAhUND zum Erzieher aufspielt, wird es dem NEINhorn zu blöd und es zischt ab.

A blast of wind flicked hair from my face. Long toes wrapped around my waist, claws prickling through fur and clothing as I was snatched from the ground. The dragon lifted me high into the grey skies above Llundain. Of the many words going through my head, Oh, bother, was the only one worthy of a priest. When I’d discovered the existence of Daear, Earth’s magical parallel world, I thought all of my dreams had come true. Riding the handsome dragon, Raven, arguing with my gryphon Associate, Morey, and raising Clyde, a mischievous snail shark, lessen the monotony of my life as the priest ...

‘You’ve never told Clyde?’ Peter asked. ‘About what happened to his mother?’ ‘How can I?’ My pen drew an outline of a shovel on my notepad. ‘I killed her with a gardening tool.’ Life certainly hasn’t been dull since my first visit to Lloegyr, a magical country which parallels England. My household now includes a family of cat-sized gryphons and a hymn-singing snail shark, and I’m visited regularly by Raven, a darkly beautiful dragon. And I enjoy the excitement of planning our wedding day with Peter, my handsome fiancé. But Lloegyr offers danger as well as wonder. My ...

When an almost-magician named Moongobble and his talking toad, Urk, move into the abandoned cottage near Edward's home, it seems like a dream come true. After all, Edward has been longing for some excitement.

Join the How to Catch kids as they try to catch a notorious dragon by setting trap after trap during the Spring Festival, also known as the Chinese New Year!

Upon the shores of an ancient sea in a long-forgotten land, the slaves of Kel - the city of tears - cried out for a hero, one who would save them from their tormented existence. What they got was Silas Kane, the most inept paladin to ever defile a holy symbol. Raised by insane monks, he’s out to spread the love of his god whether or not anyone wants it. With a high tolerance for pain and a dump stat in intelligence, Silas is on a quest to end the suffering of those in need - one way or the other.

Witch Vs. Mage. The battle continues... Once upon a time, there was a gingerbread cottage in the middle of the woods. The Big Bad Wolf had built it for his Wicked Witch, a place where they could have their Happily Ever After.
 But life isn’t a fairy tale. And there are no Happily Ever Afters for witches whose mother and aunt-in-law are coming for tea and procreational advice on Tuesday. When Drake stands her up one time too many, Penny runs away to Darkside and the games really begin. Witch Vs. Mage. Winner takes all.

No rest for the Godhunter. Kirill wants to take his family on vacation. He wants to show his daughter the land his father, Peter the Great, conquered and the small village where his mother was born. Vervain wants that for him too but as their vacation progresses, strange things start happening. People resembling Vervain's friends—her god friends—begin to appear in odd places and humans are drowning in pairs. As Kirill and Vervain investigate, their answers only lead to more questions but one thing is certain; the Godhunter doesn't get to go on holiday. Check out the rest of the ...

Fairy is a unicorn. Now, that’s not so strange. But her powerful farts, please avoid at close range. Her farts are a burst of pink rainbow dust. But run away fast, if she lets one bust. Share this farting tale with loved ones. Adults are permitted to laugh, too.

Plucky pair Winnie and Miss Drake are traveling back in time to the 1915 San Francisco World's Fair. Waiting in the past are Winnie's great-grandfather Caleb, Laura Ingalls Wilder, and a centuries-old mystery: Who stole the Heart of Kubera necklace? Despite the excitement, Winnie's only wish is to lose Rowan, an unusual boy who has the annoying habit of showing up at inconvenient times. But the wise Miss Drake knows her pet Winnie should be careful what she wishes for - especially when her wish-granting souvenirs follow them home.

Darkness rises. But so do I. The false queen has taken everything from me. My throne, my people, and worst of all, my mate. Her dark curse has stolen Tarron’s mind and compels him to try kill me. I’ll do anything to cure him and stop her. When a prophecy tells me to go find the Dragon Bloods, I know I’ll be walking into a deadly situation. It won’t stop me. Together, my friends and I will face hell itself to save the Unseelie Fae from the false queen. The question is...can we? Revolution is on the horizon, and it’s time for a new queen.

Three spartans. One princess. Various monsters. What could go wrong? The Hard Blokes of Sparta fell through a portal into a strange magical world. Now every day is a ‘don’t-get-eaten-by-a-dragon’ day. The Hard Blokes are trying to make things work, but compared to the creatures that live here, they’re not quite as hard as they thought they were. They have one last chance to prove themselves: rescue a princess, or face involuntary enrolment in a brutal-fighting-pit scenario. But how can a man - even a Spartan - compete with orcs and goblins, chimeras and dragons? Dave might have an ...

It’s not easy to fit in when you stand out. When Layla arrives for her first day of school at Unicornia, the school for unicorns, she realizes that she’s not like the other kids there. They’re all pastel colors and know the rules to Horn Ball and none of them come from the Woods like Layla does. Try as she might to make friends, Layla’s just . . . different. But when her class gets lost during a field trip to the Fiddle Dee Deep Forest, it’s up to Layla to step up and save the day.

Pete the Kitty's friend Stevie the unicorn somehow lost all the colors in her rainbow tail. It's a good thing Pete has his magical paintbrush to help out! Together, they search for the missing colors of the rainbow.

The Stryx offer EarthCent help in reaching out to the wide-spread human communities, but as usual, it comes with a catch or two. Kelly see an opportunity to increase her book hoard, just as publishing on Union Station begins to take off and Donna's daughters enter a friendly competition. But who will publish the most expensive book of all?

Jobe and Paracleus might have split up, but they reunite again in a series of events from the Legends of Arria. An epic fantasy series, the Legends of Arria features a group of heroes trying to defeat the evil dark lord Doomba. Jobe and Paracleus get caught up in the drama. In these excerpts, Jobe becomes part of the Knights of Arria while Paracleus tries his best to protect Jobe from such dangerous shenanigans. They also meet a talking falcon named Fato, who is a bit peculiar and suspicious. Then all hell breaks loose as Jobe and Paracleus are separated, with Paracleus presumed dead. Can ...

Dragons are real, and they're hungry. Marlena never expected to be a dragon slayer. She's a bleeding heart, a geek, and a lifelong animal rescuer. But when Mount St. Helens erupted for the second time in fifty years, it wasn't just ash that poured out. Dragons, legendary creatures of myth, became a terrifying reality. Now, Marlena and a ragtag band of survivors - a gamer-turned-knight, a brilliant scientist, and a former supermodel - are fighting for survival in a world where most cities have fallen. They’ve found refuge in Camelot, a makeshift haven built to withstand dragon attacks. ...

Two intrepid girls go from ladies-in-waiting to knights-in-action when they rip up the rule book and go searching for adventure! Wondermere is the luckiest kingdom in the land, all thanks to the dragons that nest on top of the castle. Nobody wants them to fly away, so everyone has to follow the rules and make sure everything stays the same to keep the dragons happy. Grace hates the rules. They stop her doing everything she loves, like playing trollo and wearing trousers and training to be a brave knight.

Originally published to accompany the Level 9 adventure game, Knight Orc, The Sign of the Orc is a dungeons and dragons story where the key characters are orcs whose lives are plagued by adventurers, and ultimately threatened by the formidable Edna Wallop and the Orc's Head Tavern Ladies Bowling team. "possibly be the finest piece of authorized fiction ever to accompany a game. ... It's very clever and funny and somehow manages to convey warmth and stunning brutality all within paragraphs of one another." Trotting Krips at joltcountry.com

Enjoy this compelling spy thriller series with loveable guy and girl next door characters. A madman seizes power in China ...and only America can stop him. In this blockbuster novel of first love and last resorts, the CIA must assemble an unlikely team of young scientists and pilots to infiltrate the Middle Kingdom and take down the ruthless megalomaniac who has set his sights on America. Join forces with America’s next hero as he uses his powers of deduction and iron will to overcome all odds, save his girl, and rescue a grateful nation. Termed “iconoclastic” and “an epic adventure...