Family Humor

Cornelius P. "Fatty" O'Leary and his wife, Betty, plan a vacation in Ireland for his 40th birthday, where they will tour his ancestral homeland and relax in the countryside. Almost immediately, things go terribly wrong: the seats in economy class on the plane are too small; the country hotel's dinner spread and bathroom fixtures leave much to be desired; and the down-to-earth O'Learys find their fellow guests are more than a little snobbish.

Hansel and Gretel walk out of their own story and into eight other classic Grimm (and Grimm-inspired) fairy tales. An irreverent, witty narrator leads us through encounters with witches, warlocks, dragons, and the devil himself. As the siblings roam a forest brimming with menacing foes, they learn the true story behind the famous tales, as well as how to take charge of their destinies and create their own happily ever after. Because once upon a time, fairy tales were awesome.

This second audiobook in Sarah Mlynowski's charming new series puts a fresh spin on the Cinderella story! Once upon a time my brother and I found a magic mirror. Tonight the mirror swept us into Cinderella's fairy tale. Now, we are not messing this story up. No way. Cinderella is going to marry her prince just like she's supposed to. Uh-oh. Cinderella broke her foot and there's massive swelling. The glass slipper won't fit, the prince won't know she's the one for him, and they won't live happily ever after. And it's all our fault!

Tracy Flick is a hardworking assistant principal at a public high school in suburban New Jersey. Still ambitious but feeling a little stuck and underappreciated in midlife, Tracy gets a jolt of good news when the longtime principal, Jack Weede, abruptly announces his retirement, creating a rare opportunity for Tracy to ascend to the top job. Energized by the prospect of her long-overdue promotion, Tracy throws herself into her work with renewed zeal, determined to prove her worth to the students, faculty, and School Board, while also managing her personal life.

It’s summer in the city and passions are soaring along with the temperature - for everyone but Mitchell Fisher, who hates all things romance. He relishes his job cutting off the padlocks that couples fasten to the famous “love story” bridge. Only his young daughter, Poppy, knows that behind his prickly veneer, Mitchell still grieves the loss of her mother.

Twenty years ago, Abigail Sorenson’s brother Robert went missing one day before her 16th birthday, never to be seen again. That same year, she began receiving scattered chapters in the mail of a self-help manual, the Guidebook, whose anonymous author promised to make her life soar to heights beyond her wildest dreams. Now, two decades after receiving those first pages, Abi is invited to an all-expenses paid weekend retreat to learn “the truth” about the Guidebook. It’s an opportunity too intriguing to refuse.

Marrying my best friend seemed like the best way to keep him in my life, but it might be the one thing that pushes him away for good. The first time I saw Jared Reynolds, I wanted to lean into him and steal some of his warmth and laid back, easygoing nature. I also wanted to kiss him, but I tucked that away. Wanting anything too much has never worked out for me. I’ll blame the wine until my dying day, but I was entirely sober when I agreed to Jared’s offer to marry me if I was still single in three years. He only offered because I’d been emotional and complaining about my perpetual ...

Meena Dave is a photojournalist and a nomad. She has no family, no permanent address, and no long-term attachments, preferring to observe the world at a distance through the lens of her camera. But Meena’s solitary life is turned upside down when she unexpectedly inherits an apartment in a Victorian brownstone in historic Back Bay, Boston.

Molly Moon has spent her entire life in a miserable orphanage run by the hairy, snaggletoothed Miss Adderson. But when she finds a mysterious book, Molly discovers an extraordinary talent, she can hypnotize anyone! Accompanied by Petula the pug, Molly hypnotizes her way to New York and Broadway stardom. But hot on her trail is the sinister professor, who is determined to use Molly to stage the crime of the century.

Holiday Recipe for Madcap Merrymaking in Jackrabbit Junction: Start with a bawdy night sprinkled with tinsel tassels and jingle balls, toss in a missing pair of underwear, and top it all off with plenty of sugary shenanigans. Serve with a side of naughty and nice. Claire Morgan and her sisters are a tad twitchy. Their father is on his way for their first Christmas in Arizona, but the tidings of joy are few and far between. For one thing, their mother is pissed about her ex-husband flying in to play Santa. For another, their mother is just pissed. Period.

The Herdmans plus Halloween have always spelled disaster. Every year, these six kids, the worst in the history of Woodrow Wilson School and possibly even the world, wreak havoc on the whole town. They steal candy, spray-paint kids, and take anything that's not nailed down. Now the mayor has had it. He's decided to cancel Halloween. The Herdmans manage to turn the worst Halloween ever into the best Halloween ever in this uproarious sequel to The Best Christmas Pageant Ever.

Lydia Millet's exquisite new novel tells the story of an Arizona man’s relationship with the family next door, whose house has one wall made entirely out of glass. The story delivers attraction and love, friendship and grief. But Millet also evokes the uncanny. Through close observation of human and animal life in the desert, she captures the daunting scale of human society without losing sight of the real difference one person can make in the world. Written with humor and benevolence, Dinosaurs asks big questions: Can a person be good? Can a man be good?

Can a marriage of convenience uncover the truth? Merle Larsen doesn't believe in love. But he needs a wife to inherit the ranch, and the waitress at the local diner seems to be single, sweet, and not expecting too much of life. He can't offer his heart, but he can offer to take care of her. Lu is glad to have snagged a waitress job in a small town where nobody knows her. It's safe, but lonely... At least she can dream about the rugged cowboy at table four, even though he belongs to the town's most powerful family. When Merle asks Lu for a loveless marriage of convenience, she can't make ...

With the passing of a new state law, it becomes a felony to harbor an undocumented immigrant in Oklahoma. So when Robert John Brown, a churchgoing family man and respected community member, is caught hiding a barnful of migrant workers with no papers, he is arrested and sent to prison. Meanwhile, his 10-year-old grandson, Dustin, tries to help the sole escapee of the raid reunite with his family, and his granddaughter, Misty, is struggling to raise her daughter alone after her husband, an illegal immigrant himself, has been deported. Then there’s Brown’s daughter Sweet, who finds her life unraveling....

Hilarious best friends Cat and Nat created a massive online community of moms by sharing their ultra-real and just a bit R-rated dispatches from the mom trenches. From what not to eat a few days after giving birth (chicken wings) to the most effective ways to dodge post-partum sex, Cat & Nat’s Mom Truths shares everything no one will tell you about having kids.

Major Ava Sharpe decided three years ago that her sister Hannah would stay with her while she recovered from injuries she received while deployed in the Middle East. Now retired and an MCJROTC High School Teacher with her best friend retired Captain Alex Danvers and retired Sargent Major Mick Rory. But Hannah being naturally clumsy as she is does some damage to the ligaments in her ankle and a small fracture leads her to needed some physical therapy. However the physical therapist one Retired Army Captain Sara Lance has Ava regretting she ever stepped foot into the place.

Varus the Elder Lich wanted nothing more than to spend eternity writing novels. He cared nothing for the fame or money, and never cared much about the total lack of company in his country cottage. He had his characters and that was plenty. Was, plenty. Until a chance interruption to his work brings some unexpected company into his unlife. It would take all his patience, all his wisdom, and more than a little of his sense of humor, to learn that sometimes being interrupted... Isn't so bad.

The marshals are looking for the perfect girl to join a mother, father, and son on the run from the nation's most notorious criminals. After all, the bad guys are searching for a family with one kid, not two, and adding a streetwise girl who knows a little something about hiding things may be just what the marshals need. Nicki swears she can keep the Trevor family safe, but to do so she'll have to dodge hit men, cyberbullies, and the specter of standardized testing, all while maintaining her marshal-mandated B-minus average.

The wackiest road trip in history continues in book four of the New York Times best-selling Genius Files series, following twins Coke and Pepsi as they dodge villains and visit weird-but-true landmarks from Texas all the way to Roswell, New Mexico. With the real-kid humor that has earned him millions of fans around the world, and featuring all-new weird-but-true locations around America, From Texas with Love is absolutely batty!

Theodosia Throckmorton has her hands full at the Museum of Legends and Antiquities in London. Her father may be head curator, but it is Theoand only Theowho is able to see all the black magic and ancient curses that still cling to the artifacts in the museum. Sneaking behind her fathers back, Theo uses old, nearly forgotten Egyptian magic to remove the curses and protect her father and the rest of the museum employees from the ancient, sinister forces that lurk in the museums dark hallways.