Funny Crime Thrillers

Sixteen delightful holiday short stories by some of your favorite Soho crime authors! This captivating collection of short mysteries and crime capers - which features New York Times best-selling authors, Crime Writers Association Gold and Diamond Dagger winners, and Edgar Award nominees - contains laughs aplenty, the most hardboiled of holiday noir, and heartwarming reminders of the spirit of the season.

What would you do if your ex got abducted? Remember, they're an ex for a reason. So let's assume you hate them from the depths of your soul. Line up the tequila shots, right? Not your problem? Now stay with me for a second. What if you were the only person who could save their life? Then would you save them? We are talking about another human being's life, after all. Now, imagine you have seven million dollars in your bank account. Sweet, right? It's seven million dollars or your ex's life. This is a judgment-free zone. Be honest. You'd keep the seven million dollars. Am I right? Yeah, me too.

THE FINAL BOOK IN THE BLUE MOUNTAIN TRILOGY IS HERE... Katrina Storm is a self-made success. She's not afraid to fight hard for what she wants... Until she's confronted with the one thing she never has: love. To her eternal regret, it appears in the form of spoiled play-boy Fox Blackstone, the youngest billionaire-in-waiting for the Blackstone Empire. Caught in a whirlwind love affair, the pair are ripped apart and then thrown together again when Fox's Machiavellian maneuvers drag Katrina back into his world with an offer she can't refuse. What was his motivation all along? Did he ever ...

All it takes is a few underhanded moves by a tough ex-cop named Eppick to pull thief John Dortmunder into a game he never wanted to play. With no choice, he sets out on a perilous treasure hunt for a long-lost gold and jewel-studded chess set once intended as a birthday gift for the last Romanov czar. Success is not inevitable with Dortmunder leading the attack, but he's nothing if not persistent, and some gambit or other might just stumble into a winning move.

LIAR. CHEAT. OUTCAST. HERO. Outrageous newspaper reporter Llew Sabler is back – and he’s gone rogue … Portsmouth. England. Late 1990s. Llew Sabler has it all: a woman he loves, a job he loves, friends he loves. But when local crook Rollo Baer dies in a fire, Llew’s law-breaking past catches up with him. His paper sacks him, his soul-mate Thirza Kirkby disowns him (again) and his grief-stricken girlfriend – Rollo’s daughter, Lucy – is lost to him. Dazed, Llew drifts into the sleepy backwaters of corporate journalism, and slowly loses the will to live. But life takes a dramatic ...

A string of brutal murders. An international conspiracy that includes the highest seats of power. A ruthless, sadistic killer who’s intent on terrorizing women. It’s tough out there for a super spy who needs to save the world on the regular. In the first book of the Partners in Crime Chronicles, Peter Bolton is a spy, but he’s up for a career change. He makes Jack Reacher look like an amateur, and he’s saved the world more times than James Bond. But now Peter is ready to retire and live a normal life without underworld figures trying to kill him every day and without a cyanide ...

It's Carnival time in paradise, but the biggest party of the year is in jeopardy. When a crucial shipment of booze goes missing, Roscoe Harper is called in to find it—fast. Roscoe's no detective, but he's got no choice but to play amateur sleuth with help from an unlikely new partner: Rosario Cruz, the mayor's strapping sister and personal bodyguard. She may be tough as nails, but can Roscoe trust her to watch his back in the island's seedy underbelly? The mismatched duo dive headfirst into their booziest case yet, but someone would rather see Carnival canceled for good. As threats ...

Lorton McCroy returns to take on the Treasure of Oak Island! Summer vacation is off to a great start when Lorton’s archaeologist uncle, Tom McCroy, invites him to join in on the search for the legendary Oak Island treasure. After convincing his reluctant parents to let him go, Lorton soon finds himself on a plane to Nova Scotia...and to adventure! Once there, they meet their guide, a mysterious one-eyed man with secrets of his own. With a treasure map in hand, the trio descend into the tunnels, where they must overcome ingenious booby traps, flooded tunnels and deadly sinkholes—and two ...

Elle Chambers is an enchantress, a witch whose powers focus on the manipulation of emotions. Some might even call her an emotion vampire. She makes her living in the natural world as an insurance investigator who solves cases using supernatural means. When an ancient relic of Scotland goes missing and Elle's powerful enchanter boyfriend, Niall, is the prime suspect, Elle travels to the Outer Hebrides with Fergie the werewolf, Rebecca the spell witch, and three goblins to meet a very special client... One who will change her path. Forever. Elle is determined to learn the truth about herself,...

It seems that both the witches and the goblins have it in for Elle and Niall. When Elle is summoned by her nemesis, Rebecca, to investigate an accident at an archaeological dig, she finds ties to the coven, but there is also evidence of goblin involvement. Even more perplexing is new information about her mother's death. Determined to get to the truth, Elle meets with the goblins, where suspicion is thrown on Niall. The coven witches have plenty to say, too, and their conflict turns territorial. Who can Elle believe: the warlock she loves, the witches, or the goblins? And when her pregnant ...

She's not a karate expert. She can't pick a lock. And she certainly isn't a master of disguise.... But Riley is stubborn, and this is her city. She's not going down without a fight! If you like female characters who are strong, funny, and real, then you're going to love Kay Riley, a Chicago cop wrongly accused of a terrorist bombing, and on the run for her life. A wiser woman might flee the country, but Riley is determined to clear her name. Armed with a quick wit and some friends who don't mind breaking a few laws, Riley becomes an amateur vigilante.

Meet Tommy Martini, the monk with an anger management problem. His meditations are interrupted by a legacy from his uncle, a crooked priest. Arriving in a New Age Arizona town to claim his inheritance, Brother Tommy meets a charismatic, smoking-hot cult leader who claims that women are being impregnated by alien beings while they sleep. Tommy’s own sleep is disturbed - by cartel hitmen, Mafia bill collectors, and women intrigued by his vow of chastity.

"Roscoe Harper is an awesome character with shades of Jack Reacher and Crocodile Dundee all rolled into one. Hugely fun and action-packed right from the first page!" —David Berens, USA Today bestselling author of Havana Nights All Roscoe Harper wants is a little fun in the sun without a care in the world. But when he lays eyes on the mysterious Maggie DuBois, he gets more than he bargained for. The sparks between them ignite into a steamy overnight fling. But when Roscoe wakes to the sound of guns cocking, he discovers Maggie has a couple dozen dangerous people wanting her six feet under....

A deeply buried and deadly secret resurface with a drowned Cadillac When Lalla Bains’ trophy red Caddy is discovered tail-fins up in a local lake, police ask why a widowed piano teacher, who couldn’t possibly see beyond the hood ornament, is found strapped in the driver’s seat. As Lalla will soon discover, there’s a shocking link between the drowned woman, her beloved father and an escaped felon--all of which will tear apart her comfortable life and bring her family into the cross-hairs of a killer.“Fresh and fun!" "With its engaging, down-on-her-luck sleuth, homicidal Caddy and a...

COLLEGE INSTALOVE LIKE YOU'VE NEVER SEEN. ANNABELLE WINTERS STYLE. I was almost free. Just dropped out of college, about to buy my dream ride, about to hit the open road to an unknown future out west. But then I see her standing under a tree, those delicate lashes unable to hide what I see in her big brown eyes. The eyes of a prisoner . . . Someone trapped in a life she didn't want . . . Those eyes whisper, "Save me. Set me free. Please." But I'm no white-knight savior. I'm a loner dropout whose only assets are his fists. Besides, this girl just said she's engaged! That's drama like I don't...

Partners in Crime and Conspiracy in Crime are the first two books in the Partners in Crime Thrillers series, a humorous, edge-of-your-seat romantic adventure series. Partners in Crime Piper Landry walks out of the redwood forests of Northern California in the middle of the night with no memory and no clothes. She knows only two things. The first is that her name must be Piper Landry because that’s what’s written on a tag bolted to her ear. The other is that she’s richer than Midas. Peter Bolton is a spy, but he’s up for a career change. He makes Jack Reacher look like an amateur, ...

Elle faces her most difficult case yet when a stolen medieval document leads them to discover a 450-year-old curse... A curse she needs to break at all costs. When a medieval document is stolen from a London import-export broker of witchcraft antiquities, the witch detective connects it to the murder and magical mayhem that has plagued two Scottish families for centuries. But the stakes are raised even higher when Elle learns that the purloined parchment is to be the ransom for two kidnapped witches. But where is it? And where are they? When Elle decides to recruit her enemy, Niall, a ...

ORIGINAL STORY, WRITTEN BY A HUMAN Get ready for the thrilling conclusion to P.G. Robertson's Saltwater Crimes Trilogy and the return of the captivating Detective Ange Watson. After the messy Gold Coast affair, Ange is certain that the syndicate has eyes and ears everywhere, thwarting her every move. Forced south to Sydney, Ange soon picks up the trail of her deadly nemesis. It seems that drug trafficking isn’t the only game in town… With the help of her colleagues and an unlikely ally, Ange dives into the murky world of cryptocurrency and NFTs, exploring the dangerous waters where ...

Detective Valentine investigates the murder of a scathing judge of a singing competition. An unknown assailant strikes and kills the popular judge with her own Emmy. As Valentine investigates the homicide, she discovers the victim had earned the nickname "The Dream Crusher" and gathered numerous enemies. After she digs deeper, she finds a rival judge, an arrogant producer, an estranged brother, and a host of others with more than enough motive to deliver the deadly blow. When bodies start to pile up and her suspect list grows, Valentine must uncover the murderer before her own voice is ...

ORGINAL STORY, WRITTEN BY A HUMAN All things are connected - Tread Carefully. Detective Ange Watson is tougher than she looks, even tougher than she realises. Which is just as well... When asked to find a young surfer who vanished from a nearby fishing village, Ange feels confident she’ll solve the matter quickly, leaving the weekend free to enjoy the beach and catch some awesome waves. It’s ironic how the simple jobs are the ones that turn to custard. As Ange dives deeper into the case, she's swept up in a frantic chase to expose the truth and prevent further carnage. Every turn ...