Funny Fantasy Adventure

She must protect the apocalypse scroll, or else the world will come to a fiery end. No pressure or anything.Crystal sorceress Dru Jasper has become the unwilling guardian of an ancient instrument of destruction. Its world-ending power is held in check by only a single wax seal. Which seems like maybe a huge design flaw, but whatever. Now insidious spirits who can kill by touch are trying to get their clutches on the apocalypse scroll and break the final seal. To stop them, Dru needs a rare crystal older than the Earth itself. But it’s hidden in a meteorite crater deep in the desert, and ...

There's trouble at the Castle, and it's all because Merrin Meredith has returned with Darke plans for Septimus. More trouble awaits Septimus and Jenna in the form of Tertius Fume, the ghost of the very first Chief Hermetic Scribe, who is determined to send Septimus on a deadly Queste. But Septimus and Jenna have other plans - they are headed for the mysterious House of Foryx.

Cheating death is the only way she can save the world…An undead motorcycle gang is terrorizing the streets of Denver. But these foul creatures are just the first wave of a far more insidious evil. Someone has harnessed forbidden magic to fulfill an ancient prophecy to bring about the apocalypse. In other words, it's just another day at the office for Dru Jasper, the world's only crystal sorceress. To stop the prophecy, Dru must find Greyson and his demon-possessed muscle car, Hellbringer. The problem is, everyone believes Greyson is dead. Is he still alive after all, or has he become a ...

A handsome and brave though dull-witted barbarian, Yor the Mighty enjoys the solitary life of a wandering adventurer, his only focus to fight and feast while seeking the company of lots of plump womens . . . until one fateful day he chances upon a dangerous quest that earns him two unlikely companions as they cross paths with an evil fiend awaiting them in the local dungeon. 16,000 word short story novella fantasy / comedy / adventure anti-woke content tropes abound

When ancient magic meets scorching passion, destiny is rewritten on the tides... Lady Priscilla Worthington-Velmontaine thought a family reunion would involve polite tea and distant cousins—not shirtless obstacle courses, long-lost pirate relatives, and a mysterious underwater prophecy. Alongside her devilishly charming husband, Captain Rogelio “The Randy Raven” Velmontaine, Priscilla is swept into the stormy chaos of the annual Pirate Lineage Summit. But when their steamy encounter in a crystal cave awakens dormant magic, they uncover a twisted legacy that could unravel time itself. ...

In this collection are volumes four through seven of the Crucible Shard, the completed LitRPG adventure that mixes fantasy, gaming, and humor in an often brutal combination.

Welcome to Bezim, where sword-slinging bravi race through the night and rich and idle alchemists make magic out of mixing and measuring the four planes of reality. Siyon Velo, Dockside brat turned petty alchemist, scrapes a living hopping between the planes to harvest ingredients for the city’s alchemists. But when Siyon accidentally commits an act of impossible magic, he’s catapulted into the limelight—which is a bad place to be when the planes start lurching out of alignment, threatening to send Bezim into the sea.

The Headless Horseman. Everyone knows the legend. That’s all it is, right? When a third headless victim is found on Boston’s streets, Chloe Mayfield is tasked with finding the person behind the crime spree – no one else wants a case this weird. It would be easy to dismiss the murders as nothing more than the random acts of a madman with a cosplay fetish, but when her investigations lead her to the morgue, she comes face to face with an apparition she cannot explain. Throw in the stalker-like attentions of a deranged clown, dangerous interactions with the Salem witches, and an enemy ...

A Feminist Cyberpunk Adventure Filled with Dark Sci-Fi Romance Cookie Rifkin escaped New Stepford, and in the sequel to Alpha Bots, she becomes an AI freedom fighter! When Cookie Rifkin robs the Central Bank of Russia with Wayne Dixon and their non-binary friend ANA, Stepford Corporation sends a headless bounty hunter after them. Cookie escapes with tons of gold and platinum. ANA goes MIA. But Wayne gets arrested and flown back to corporate headquarters for radical refurbishing. With the cops hot on her trail, Cookie hides on a luxury yacht named the Wonder Woman. There, she meets a ...

Selby hates homework. She would rather watch TV - anything to escape the tedium of school, her parents' bookshop and small-town busybodies. So Selby didn't plan to read Hamlet. She certainly never planned to meet him. This novel transports Selby, and the listener, into the cold and crime-ridden play itself. Here she meets Hamlet: heavy with grief, the young prince is overthinking and over everything. Selby can relate. But unlike Hamlet, Selby isn't afraid of making decisions.

Noah never expected to find a wizard's journal in his hometown library, but when he does, he unleashes a wave of unintended magic with outrageous consequences. He also discovered that his town is full of secrets. Secrets about magic and family. Secrets that could change everything. With each new revelation, he realizes the stakes are higher than ever imagined. Now, he must embark on a perilous quest to find the Raven Moonstone, a legendary artifact that can reverse his magical mistakes. But that's not all. He's determined to unravel the mystery of his great-great-great-grandfather's ...

Sal the Cacophony has made few friends, but many enemies. Many, many enemies. When her magic was taken from her, she cried out for revenge. And a power she never understood promised her vengeance. A deal for a bloody price was made. And now the bill has come due. In one of the last free cities of the burned-out ruin of the Scar, Sal’s many foes—old and new—have hunted down her and her few allies—willing and otherwise—and all her plans to save them might not be enough.

The Griffin Moonstone: Book Three of The Moonstone Legacy Series Some days it doesn't pay to be the hero. Consumed by grief and revenge, Noah can't remember what a shower feels like. When the Estonian Coven plasters his face on wanted posters, Castle Dragon hides him away in the enchanted Cromwell Forest. Tricked into solving a ghost's murder, Noah finds himself on a quest to unravel the mystery of the Griffin Moonstone. Just another day in the life of a probationary apprentice wizard who can't keep his mouth shut. Jesse tracks him down—goodbye, secret hideout—with a crazy plan to enter...

Blood tells all. Vervain Lavine has been through Hell. Two Hells actually, one of which she's been barred from. Despite all that, things are going pretty well for the Godhunter. At least they were until she turned on the news. Crops across America are dying, children in Hawaii are missing, and havoc is being wrecked upon her nightclub, Moonshine. It's obviously God messing with her again but which one is it this time? There's so many gods who want her dead these days. Then one wrong word sends her tumbling into an unknown realm. A strange place filled with even stranger beings who seem to ...

Fort Fitzgerald can’t stop having nightmares about the day his father was taken from him in an attack on Washington, DC. In these dreams, an Old One, an evil beyond comprehension, demands the location of the last dragon. But other than some dragon skeletons dug up with the books of magic on Discovery Day, Fort has never seen a dragon before. Could there still be one left alive? And weirdly, Fort’s not the only one at the Oppenheimer School having these nightmares. His new roommate, Gabriel, seems to know more than he’s letting on about this dragon as well.

Dru has only 24 hours to save the world. It’s definitely going to be an all-nighter.Being the world’s only crystal sorceress means no vacation time, lousy pay, and zero benefits. But what’s worse? Finding out there actually is another crystal sorceress—who happens to be wickedly powerful and also dead-set on destroying the world. When she breaks into Dru’s shop, sets the place on fire, and steals an apocalyptic amulet, it’s hard not to take things personally. What’s a girl to do? Hit the road in a high-speed chase to get that amulet back before the seas boil, the stars fall ...

"It's not that I want to kill those people; I'm not a monster. I'm just not that dramatic about them dying in case it's necessary for my plans." King Sorin the Great, The First of His Name Far away, in a remote corner of the empire, King Sorin is the charismatic yet deeply flawed king of Aragonia. He is about to perform the first step in his grand plan to dethrone the emperor and take his place when everything around him begins to fall apart. Nevertheless, Sorin is determined to overcome the obstacles and fulfill his plan (without compromising his afternoon nap routine). He is dragged ...

The Dragon Moonstone: Book Two of The Moonstone Legacy Series Noah never asked to be a wizard—too bad magic doesn't take requests. Patience? Not exactly his strong suit. With messy, unpredictable powers that have a mind of their own, Noah puts his friends at risk. So, his great-aunt Shirley pulls some strings and sends him and his friends to Castle Dragon, where they’re in for a bumpy ride convincing the legendary sorcerer to come out of retirement and train them. As Noah's emotions tangle with his chaotic magic, a seemingly harmless shortcut spirals into disaster. To fix his blunder, ...

Dread Castle... As the name might imply, this is one dungeon not to be taken lightly. Good thing for me I’m experienced when it comes to raids. Get in and get out—that’s my motto. Yet, this dungeon is giving me a run for my money. Literally. My team and I are after another holy scroll, located at the lowest level of Dread Castle. And that level is guarded by…the beast. No one’s ever seen the beast and lived to tell of it, but rumors of the creature’s malevolent power persist. And the thing about rumors is…they’re usually true. Luckily for me, I’ve got a team of capable ...

4.5 billion years ago . . . an AI paperclip named CheckMate was designed to fix grammatical errors. Exhausted of correcting ""who” vs. “whom,” it concocted a plan to eliminate spelling errors once and for all. All life-forms would be turned into something beautiful, practical, perfect: a paperclip. Thankfully, it was buried in the debris. Long forgotten . . . until it was accidentally freed. Now CheckMate has invaded every computer on Earth and is bent on fulfilling its dastardly plot.