Funny Fiction Fantasy

On the first day of school, Artie falls out of his bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." On the second day of school, Artie falls out of bed and hits his head. Hard. He tells his mom he's dizzy, and she says: "You’re just worried about your first day in a new school." Huh?

In book 4 there’s the librarian, of course, all the main characters from books 1-3, including the town of Eden which is certainly a main character, and a witch. It begins with her asking the librarian to find her Familiar, a cat. It ends with, well, I can’t tell you that. Expect suspense and unexpected twists and turns, odd characters, and the same kind of humor that is in the other novels because I’m pretty much unable to have any other kind. Hope you enjoy it.

Alba is about to lose everything during an awful divorce...until she meets the Vampires of Emberbury, who dwell under an abandoned graveyard, stuck in Victorian times. They will make her a very interesting job offer, and she will get to meet Clarence, a mysterious vampire gentleman who thinks cloaks and top hats are still in fashion. With his help, Alba will figure out that, sometimes, the scariest monster isn’t the one with fangs.

Harry Potter meets The Hunger Games in a world of glistening skyscrapers and competitive guilds in author P.S. Scott's debut novel. Longlisted for the Writementor Children's Novel Award 2021 and The Page Turner Awards 2021. “A crisp, stylized fantasy with plenty of surprises.” —Kirkus Reviews “Angel Land by P.S. Scott is an angelic treat; a story woven with grace, mystery, coming of age, and strength.” —Reader’s Favorite Reviews “Entertaining while being sensitive, ANGEL LAND marks a fine debut for P.S. Scott. She is an author to watch!” —Grady Harp, Amazon Hall of Fame ...

On a desperate journey to recover her sister's lost soul, Valkyrie Cain goes up against the High Sanctuary itself, and there's nothing Skulduggery Pleasant can do to stop her. With Abyssinia's grand plan about to kick off in a night of magic, terror, and bloodshed, it falls to Omen Darkly to save the lives of thousands of innocent people. And as the madness unfolds around him, as hidden enemies step into the light, and as Valkyrie is sucked into a desperate, lawless quest of her own, he has no choice but to become the hero he never really wanted to be - or die in the attempt.

Her midlife should be bursting with calm, not the chaos of feuding children and a rampaging dragon. Ginny Smyth's life just got traumatizingly tangled. The beleaguered 40-plus genie had enough on her plate thwarting a deranged dragon shifter from incinerating her enchanted island sanctuary. The absolute last thing she needs is for her warring children to magically appear from thin air and become the center of the perilous danger. With ominously menacing threats plunging her eclectic mix of friends into an ever-increasing torment of despair, Ginny is once again thrust into the volatile debt ...

A clueless daughter. An unhinged fae vampire. Can this genie resist the wish to flee midlife before she's retired from the land of the living? Ginny just wants some peace. But the beleaguered 40+ divorced genie faces the arduous test of preparing her oblivious daughter to gain the genie crown to prevent them from being hurled into a doom-filled destiny. All while battling an ancient fae vampire hell-bent on turning her life into a terminal tornado of turmoil. But when the earth-shattering secrets of her friends-turned-family start to unravel, they threaten not only Ginny's last nerve but ...

Her midlife was meant to be tranquil, not a magical battle for survival. Ginny's forever home is being ravaged. Escalating threats are endangering the forty-plus genie's magical island sanctuary, as well as targeting the young girl she considers her daughter. Even her sentient store, crammed with dangerously enchanted artifacts, is perilously perched on the brink of mutiny. Discovering her allies are keeping ominous secrets hurls Ginny's life into chaos, and risks throwing her to the mercy of the enigmatic vampire, despite warnings from the surly talking cat to avoid him. And while her ...

Selby hates homework. She would rather watch TV - anything to escape the tedium of school, her parents' bookshop and small-town busybodies. So Selby didn't plan to read Hamlet. She certainly never planned to meet him. This novel transports Selby, and the listener, into the cold and crime-ridden play itself. Here she meets Hamlet: heavy with grief, the young prince is overthinking and over everything. Selby can relate. But unlike Hamlet, Selby isn't afraid of making decisions.

A Pi/Sci-Fi/Comedy/Thriller introducing Philip Humphrey Chandler as the socially inept hero who likes beer, coffee and breasts - but not necessarily in that order. Phil is private investigator; he's got a computer and a comfy chair, and he knows how to use them. He doesn't get all sweaty chasing the bad guys; not when his fingers can do the work as he sips his coffee and looks forward to a nice cool pint. He doesn't wrestle the perp to the ground, with a quick quip and a steely gaze; not when he can sit in his comfy chair and dream about the girl behind the bar; the one with the breasts. ...

A Feminist Cyberpunk Adventure Filled with Dark Sci-Fi Romance Cookie Rifkin escaped New Stepford, and in the sequel to Alpha Bots, she becomes an AI freedom fighter! When Cookie Rifkin robs the Central Bank of Russia with Wayne Dixon and their non-binary friend ANA, Stepford Corporation sends a headless bounty hunter after them. Cookie escapes with tons of gold and platinum. ANA goes MIA. But Wayne gets arrested and flown back to corporate headquarters for radical refurbishing. With the cops hot on her trail, Cookie hides on a luxury yacht named the Wonder Woman. There, she meets a ...

When a passenger check-in desk at Terminal Two, Heathrow Airport, shot up through the roof engulfed in a ball of orange flame, the usual people tried to claim responsibility. First the IRA, then the PLO and the Gas Board. Even British Nuclear Fuels rushed out a statement to the effect that the situation was completely under control, that it was a one-in-a-million chance, that there was hardly any radioactive leakage at all and that the site of the explosion would make a nice location for a day out with the kids and a picnic.

🌲💖 Love is wild… literally! Bigfoot in Love is a whimsical, mysterious, and heartwarming collection of short stories where romance meets the unknown! From gentle Sasquatches watching from the shadows to unexpected forest encounters, these tales will make you laugh, swoon, and maybe even believe in love beyond the ordinary! 🌿 Inside, you'll find: 🦶 A lonely cryptid finding his perfect match 🌕 A woman drawn to the deep woods… and something watching her 💌 Secret letters exchanged between a human and a hidden admirer 🔥 A hunter who becomes the hunted… by love! ✨ ...

When the 13th Classroom is struck by purple lightning, something strange happens - all of the students get superpowers! You might think this was superb, but it was not. (It was sorta silly.) With great gifts comes wild weather, giant roaches, atomic farts, and other tricky troubles. As the students of Classroom 13 are about to learn, getting superpowers is not always super.

Praise for Alice Crowley's writing: "I LOVED THE IMAGINATION OF THIS AUTHOR!" ~Satisfied Kindle Reader "FIVE STARS!" ~ Multiple Fans "Alice Crowley is one of our best living authors!" ~ G. Taylor Ciedre is just a young professional woman in the big city when she meets the hunk of her life named Shane, who rescues her from a gang of vampire aliens who are hell-bent on harvesting the blood of all earthlings. And to the victors go the spoils. After Shane saves the day, Ciedre demands he show her the ancient art of the erotic fist. And this mutant's fists are bigger than any mortal male's...

The Stryx offer EarthCent help in reaching out to the wide-spread human communities, but as usual, it comes with a catch or two. Kelly see an opportunity to increase her book hoard, just as publishing on Union Station begins to take off and Donna's daughters enter a friendly competition. But who will publish the most expensive book of all?

Harnessing planetary forces, Terramancers shape landscapes and avert natural disasters. But not this one. He collects rocks. Out of a job and on the run from his rainbow-haired adversary, the Terramancer is ready to jump to the next system and start again. Again. It’s not his fault he’s made more enemies than friends. Cutthroat pirates, ruthless socialites, and the ancient and powerful Terramantic Order all stand between him and escape. When he finds the most sought-after rock in the universe, it’s one problem he can’t get away from—the rock, it seems, has been waiting for him.

Fantasy, mystery, and adventure collide in this exciting story that will leave you believing in the magic of Christmas! The perfect book for kids ages 8 to 12 this holiday season. Leo spends his time drinking hot cocoa, inventing new toys, and celebrating Christmas––but he is no ordinary elf! Leo is Santa’s guardian and sworn protector of the North Pole. Leo's life is pretty great, until the day Santa Claus tells him the world’s Christmas Spirit is in danger. With Christmas just around the corner, Santa Claus sends Leo on a mission to find the evil Sorrow King, a powerful wizard who...

In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.

"Fun, fun, fun! Like the love child of Douglas Adams and Terry Pratchett!" Man plans, the Multiverse laughs! "It's like that book about anti-gravity. You can't put it down." "A story 14 billion years in the making!" "Finally, a treatment for readers suffering "Dirk Gently or Hitchhiker's Guide withdrawal!" "Not only is this case stranger than we imagine, it's stranger than we can imagine." No other detective is quite like Dr. Ziegfeld Zaggar, Quantum Detective -- and that's probably for the best. Zaggar and his reluctant, obsessively linear-thinking sidekick, Jack Robbins, investigate the ...