Funny Science Fiction

Mum and Dad have left—gone to Mars, and they’re never coming back. Freedom at last! But this isn’t one of Dad’s weird jokes; it’s REAL. It’s up to 10-year-old Eliza and her genius little brother, Johnnie, to find out what’s going on, and launch a rescue. Can they handle vampire squids, a suspicious villain, a secret island full of traps and a trip into space? And—more importantly—will they ever get their parents back?

WHEN A VAMPIRE ACCIDENTALLY EXPOSES HERSELF TO SUNLIGHT... Can the sun god, Apollo, save her from destruction, and what will he expect in return? Reading this poignant, erotic short story, you'll laugh, you'll cry, and you'll shiver with juicy excitement. Intended for mature audiences 18+ only. Contains explicit descriptions of sexual acts, vampire trivia, crypto-erotica, and historical mead references. This book is 2,102 words long, and deeply moving. Or arousing. Or both.

On a desperate journey to recover her sister's lost soul, Valkyrie Cain goes up against the High Sanctuary itself, and there's nothing Skulduggery Pleasant can do to stop her.

When his friends aren’t successful at spooking the children who visit the haunted house, Gus must present his unique superpowers to give them a scare!

When the twenty-three Altoonian spaceships arrive at Earth, they not only shatter the shaky peace of the place, they thrust Vice President James Fenimore Hunter into a role he may not be ready for. While the aliens keep saying they’ve come in peace, the real reasons and the real costs are more than the vice president can ignore. Unfortunately, in his bungling attempts to stop this absurd madness, he unwittingly makes the most foolish decisions and chooses the worst allies, and thereby becomes the unwitting agent of the apocalypse. But he needs to make things right...or die trying.

When something's amiss in Spookie House, there's usually only one person to blame: Araminta. But this time she had nothing to do with the disappearance of Barry Wizzard's frogs, and she is determined to find them. Of course, it's not going to be that easy, especially when dealing with a crazy character named Old Morris, a dangerous shark, and a demanding aquarium show audience. Can Araminta find the frogs and steal the show?

Drusinella is a fairy with attitude. Banished from Fairy Land, because she has the nasty habit of turning princes into frogs with no way to change them back, she now has to live without wings as a punishment. A stupid princess, Camria, saves Drusinella from fairy hunters, which by fairy law means she must grant her deepest wish. It is, of course, the one thing Drusinella hates more than princes: true love. Now the two go on an adventure to find the prince of Camria’s dreams (who, in all likelihood, has been turned into a frog by Drusinella).

Born into a world with only seven days to live, Sim faces the same choice everyone does: How will he spend them? Is there something greater to hope for? A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.

The Unidentified Funny Objects series delivers an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices!

Banged by a Pterodactyl Billionaire Erotic humor with a political twist; who says politics and erotica can’t go together. A handsome billionaire pterodactyl billionaire is running for Supreme Being in his world. He comes to use to wreak havoc and destruction to prove his worth as a pterodactyl leader. More books than one The first story is completely new and is erotic humor. There is one erotic horror (I warn ahead of time when it’s coming) in case you’re not into both horror and erotic. The other books are reworks of material published at one time or another. I might as well call ...

The Unidentified Funny Objects series serves an annual dose of funny, zany, and unusual science fiction and fantasy stories. All-new fiction from the genre's top voices! Our sixth volume features a Mad Amos story by Alan Dean Foster, a Harry the Book tale by Mike Resnick, and an Alexander Outland short by Gini Koch.

It's the 25th century, and the American President has taken over the world. Meanwhile, after a cleaner unplugged his cryogenic freezing machine by accident, Detective Inspector Capstan wakes up to find that he's been in a state of suspended animation for more than 400 years. As he's forced to adjust to life in the future, he finds himself reinstated as a policeman, and together with the great-great-great-great-grandson of his former subordinate, Sergeant Dewbush, he's put on the case of a missing cow.

Mordak isn't bad as far as goblin kings go, but when someone - or something - starts pumping gold into the human kingdoms, it puts his rule in serious jeopardy. Suddenly he's locked in an arms race with a species whose arms he once considered merely part of a calorie-controlled diet. Helped by an elf with a background in journalism and a master's degree in being really pleased with herself, Mordak sets out to discover what on Earth (if indeed, that's where he is) is going on.

The invitation to bring humanity into the galactic community of intelligent species was going horribly wrong. A trail of dead aliens seem to follow Jeff Abel's every step, each envoy and ambassador meeting an untimely end. Is Jeff the hapless victim of some sinister plan, or is he the galaxy's scourge that needs to be stopped? Is humanity's invitation about to be canceled? A science fiction adventure novel, A Beginner's Guide to Invading Earth tells the story of a reclusive ex-computer programmer turned pot-washer who is the unwitting central figure of a plot to keep humanity from ever ...

It’s all fun and games at the circus...until everyone’s favorite clown winds up dead. Someone killed Clint the Clown. Madam Electra’s crystal ball could help find the murderer, but she risks exposing her own secrets in the process. Secrets that could land her on the endangered species list. Head security officer Bruno Maska has been ordered to enlist the help of the one person he suspects is hiding something - Electra. The same woman who’s been haunting his thoughts since their drunken night together.

The fate of the world lies with one man: Bip Plunkerton. Talentless scientist and frequent drinker at the Empty Goat, young Bip Plunkerton will follow in his father’s footsteps as a volunteer...footsteps that have yet to return from the wilds of the wide world outside.

Incredible Science Fiction: Amazing Tales from the 50's and Beyond, Volume Two collates a collection of some of the very best science-fiction stories published in the '50s together. All these stories (with the exception of The Anatomy of Fear) are now in the public domain and were original published in various science-fiction magazines that were very popular in the 1950s. This is a lovingly curated collection of some of the very best stories published during this time. This collection includes a further story from the Hugo Award-nominated Rog Phillips.

"Dragons have invaded Crumbling Castle, and all of King Arthur’s knights are either on holiday or visiting their grannies. It’s a disaster! Luckily, there’s a spare suit of armour and a very small boy called Ralph who’s willing to fill it. Together with Fortnight the Friday knight and Fossfiddle the wizard, Ralph sets out to defeat the fearsome fire-breathers. But there's a teeny weeny surprise in store.

In consequence of a number of stunning catastrophes, Arthur Dent is surprised to find himself living in a hideously miserable cave on prehistoric Earth. However, just as he thinks that things cannot get possibly worse, they suddenly do. He discovers that the Galaxy is not only mind-boggingly big and bewildering but also that most of the things that happen in it are staggeringly unfair.

Alex has a crush on the new teacher’s assistant, and he’s finally worked up the nerve to approach her. Too bad she’s crossed the University’s star player, and Duncan Shaw has no choice but to make her disappear. He plans to lay the blame on the local urban legend, but tonight he just might learn that some legends are real.