Funny Self

Make the most of the rest of your life! You’ve just retired. It’s a huge life change! How do you make the transition to post-employment? This inspirational collection of wisdom and witticisms, offering insights, experience, and encouragement, is an entertaining guide to having a purposeful and fulfilling retirement. It's a comprehensive look at the day-to-day retirement experience, exploring what to expect when you retire. With real-time advice to motivate and maintain your happiness as you move into your new post-employment lifestyle, you will discover how to: Understand the process of...

I've been called a 'bitch' more times than I can remember. I'll admit, at first I considered it a negative label and overreacted. But then something interesting happened - I awoke to the realization that I responded to certain people and situations with bitchy behavior. It wasn't that I was a 'bitch'; instead, I was conditioned to respond to anxiety, stress, and insecurities with an unconscious attitude. Mindfulness changed my perspective and a wonderful transformation followed. Do you find yourself constantly judging others and yourself, unable to shake the critical voice in your head? ...

In this follow up to the #1 New York Times bestseller I Funny, middle schooler Jamie Grimm has big dreams of being the best stand-up comic in the world—and he won't let the fact that he's wheelchair-bound stand in his way. After winning the New York state finals in the Planet's Funniest Kid Comic Contest, Jamie's off to Boston to compete in the national semi-finals.

Four children's Great books, all rolled into one. best for bedtime stories beginner / early reader poetry for kids. best animals stories, value tales

Jamie Grimm has finally accomplished his dream of proving himself the Planet's Funniest Kid Comic, and the sky's the limit from there. Enter a couple of TV executives with a huge plan for Jamie: a new show about Jamie and his oddball friends! But when Jamie struggles to learn the acting ropes, will it be an early curtain call for the biggest show of the decade?

A Revolutionary Anti-Self-Help Book for People Who Are Tired of Fixing Themselves In a world obsessed with productivity, self-improvement, and becoming your “best self,” here comes a book that gently—and unapologetically—refuses to play along. The Book That Changes Nothing is a humorous, minimalist, and thought-provoking guide for anyone who's ever rolled their eyes at life hacks, personal growth checklists, or morning routine gurus. This is not a book of transformation. It’s a book of observation. Reflection. Occasional sarcasm. And a quiet celebration of simply being who you ...

How to Be Poor and Stay Broke for the Rest of Your Damn Life! A Satirical Self-Help Classic for Anyone Deep in Debt, Denial, or Designer Shoes They Can’t Afford What if everything you’ve ever learned about money was true... and also the reason you’re broke? Welcome to the anti-guidebook you didn’t know you needed — a hilariously raw, brutally honest, and painfully accurate parody of financial failure. Whether you’re living paycheck-to-Thursday, ghosting your landlord, or spiritually allergic to Excel spreadsheets, this book will validate your worst decisions and nudge you (...

Teach your child patience! * * * * * * * * * "You forgot the mail?" The king yelled at the snail. But the snail stayed as calm as could be. He was not afraid of the king, you see. He knew where the gift was; he knew what to do. The monsters learned that patience pays off too. We are all familiar with the phenomenon of children wanting everything "here and now". This story describes just such a situation. I hope you and your children will enjoy it and learn from it. 子どもたちに辛抱について教えてくれる１冊！ 「郵便を忘れただと？」王様はカタツムリ君に...

The New Mrs D: An Amazon No1 Best Seller. "After The Midnight Library, The 5th Woman, and Olive, Again... Meet The New Mrs D – The Sharp, Heartfelt and Uplifting Reinvention of a Woman Breaking Free. 'Wine-spittingly, chocolate-chokingly brilliant! Hill is the Tom Sharpe of her era! Genuinely laugh out loud funny with great writing and a plot to keep you hooked. Buy it, read it - but if like me you are of a certain age, do so with an empty bladder." – Amanda Prowse, author of The Idea of You and What Have I Done. Bernice Dando thought she had the perfect honeymoon planned in sunny ...

30 Days to Stop Being a Jealous Boyfriend is a unique mindfulness workbook that will help you overcome jealousy and cultivate a more fulfilling relationship with your partner. This 30-day program offers a transformative approach to addressing jealousy and insecurity, with daily exercises that blend mindfulness techniques, cognitive behavioral therapy, and self-reflection. You'll learn how to identify and challenge negative thought patterns, communicate more effectively with your partner, and develop a greater sense of self-awareness and self-worth. This book is part of a series of ...

Teaching other kids how to be funny is the toughest gig that Jamie Grimm has ever had, and with the highest stakes. If he fails, his school library will be shut down for good! With the fate of his school's library on his shoulders, Jamie has to dig deep to see if he has what it takes to succeed at his most difficult challenge yet.

There has been ample discourse on masculinity, on the qualities of a real man, a devoted father, a supportive husband, and a conscientious citizen. However, before embarking on a journey toward any of these ideals, a man must first learn to love his cock. Having an exceptionally large one, I felt compelled to share my vision of manhood. In this book, I explain how a man can harness the power of his penis and channel it toward meaningful progress, such as ending poverty or solving climate change. Within these pages, I will teach you how to walk into a room and own it, how to eat steak like a...

Lena quit. She quit situationships that felt like spiritual internships. Quit ghosters and gaslighters who called her “sensitive” like it was an insult. Quit shrinking herself to be chosen by men who couldn’t even choose healing. She wanted a soft life—but it wasn’t as aesthetic as TikTok made it seem. It looked like crying in Whole Foods, deleting “maybe” numbers, lighting frankincense while blocking toxic exes, and learning to trust herself again. It smelled like rose petals and weed. It felt like learning to want—without apology. And in that sacred in-between, something ...

He doesn’t want more. He just wants to be wanted. Lance Lockwoods did everything right — the steady job, the marriage, the two beautiful daughters. But somewhere between bedtime stories and "I'm too tired" for the thousandth time, he lost himself. The passion is gone. The bedroom’s dead. And now it’s instinct — she just dodges him. So what does a decent man do when his wife pulls away, his soul flatlines, and nobody sees him slipping? When every option nukes his life? When he’s in a free fall? Because love isn’t supposed to leave you touch-starved. And the real betrayal is ...

Do you often find yourself being critical and judgmental towards others, unable to control your negative thoughts and behavior? Do you struggle to maintain positive relationships due to your rude and mean comments? If so, it's time to take a step back and focus on cultivating greater self-awareness and compassion with 30 Days to Stop Being an Asshole. This comprehensive mindfulness program features 30 unique exercises designed to help you identify the underlying causes of your critical behavior, cultivate self-compassion, and build healthier, more supportive relationships. With each ...

You’ve read the tips. You’ve tried the teas. You’ve stared at the ceiling like it owed you money. Still wide awake? If you’re exhausted, frustrated, and wondering if you’ll ever sleep like a normal human again… I get it. I’ve been there. And I’m here to help. I’m not a doctor. I’m not a wellness guru. I’m a rogue librarian—equal parts sleep-deprived researcher, caffeine survivor, and curious human—who went down the rabbit hole of sleep science when nothing else worked. This book is the result of that deep dive. It’s the guide I wish I had years ago. The Rogue ...

Let's be honest: Life did not come with a user's manual. Sure you probably got the basics growing up - don't touch hot stoves, tie your shoes, say "please" even when you want to scream. But no one sat you down and explained the truly weird, invisible stuff - like how to exit a conversation without sounding rude, why everyone suddenly becomes a weatherman when small talk runs dry, or how to understand what "let's do lunch sometime" actually means. This book is all about all that and more. It is a tour through the stuff you weren't taught - but were expected to just "get" somewhere alone the ...

Are you an asshole? Yes? No? How do you know either way? Being an asshole has a different meaning to different people. It varies by social class, race, gender, personality, mood, etc. Because of this, it can be a difficult thing to pin down, but in general, following the basic rules of applying common sense to most situations and being decent towards others will usually render you "asshole-free". Confused? You're not alone. People by the millions walk around every day performing actions they deem completely acceptable; Never cognizant of the fact that they just became a total asshole to ...

Lottie’s just been dumped, or at least she thinks she has. With a university reunion looming she has nothing to show for the past ten years except a part-time job in her friend’s plant shop and a jar of pickled gherkins. To console herself Lottie seeks solace in her favourite corner of the internet, a mysterious level-up life guru who preaches words of wisdom from the comfort of stunning exotic locations, and it’s definitely cheaper than spending money on tarot readings. With her big dick energy ex off travelling the world in search of the perfect veneers, Lottie finds herself ...

You can chant affirmations, burn all the sage in your house, and forgive every man who emotionally ghosted you while still following your stories—but sometimes the real breakthrough starts with an ugly cry, a lacefront lifting at the corners, and a desperate Google search for “how to block someone spiritually.” Meet Jessie: a beautiful, bold, overworked witch in retail hell who’s officially done being everyone’s spiritual mule, emotional rehab center, and situationship soulmate. Armed with tarot decks, blunt sarcasm, and a fake wedding ring that gets more compliments than her ex ...