Funny Shorts

Joe DeRozier sits at a big table in his bakery. The sheeter's over there. There are racks with trays of donuts. A police officer stops in. His kids come by. Someone up front wants a particular pastry--does he have it? His mother-in-law visits there. She's beautiful. Joe thinks a lot and writes it down. Those thoughts draw portraits of his mother-in-law, the police officer, and the town he loves. He says he just makes donuts, but he does more. Much more. Welcome to DeRozier's. Enjoy the visit.

Funny Business is based around the theme of - what else - humor, and if you’re familiar with Jon and Guys Read, you already know what you’re in store for: an hilarious story.

"Elementary, my dear Rand. It works because it's impossible!" - Quinn Schmul, eccentric inventor. A whirlwind tale of time travel, magic, science, coffee, geeks, logic, fallacy, and spaghetti. Rand likes his coffee, his sleep, and the study of philosophy. Especially philosophy. He craves the beauty and rigor of it. That's why he's studying formal logic at an age when he should be doing something far more sensible with his life. It's a mystery how he ended up getting roped into his girlfriend-inventor's latest experiment. Sure, yeah, Quinn has terrific hair, and as a barista in her day job, ...

Eden can’t believe her eyes, JD Stone, after all these years, in the flesh. The way he fills out his jeans should be illegal. Her heart palpitates in places it shouldn’t palpitate and her husband knows it. With one look, she gives away a secret she’s been hiding for years, a desire to sleep with her high school crush. Eden is the love of JD’s life, she just so happens to also be the love of Tyler’s. JD never thought he’d get the chance to have her until he saw her at the mall this Christmas, the day before Birthmas, her Christmas Eve birthday. He couldn’t believe his luck when...

Slim Gobbelgonne owned the largest turkey farm in America, but when the gobbling finally penetrated his psyche it sent everybody in the United States down a path of horror that ultimately became the greatest Thanksgiving Day in history. Brace yourself for the impact. ~ A Thanksgiving Short Story

Annie is the bane of my existence. The worst neighbor in the universe. A busty bombshell. And she lives right next door. When Annie comes knocking, getting on my case and making demands, I do what I've been wanting to do for ages. Hint: It involves a certain individual's rear end. Maybe this time we can put the hostility behind us. This explosive, untamed tale will burn up your device. Joel and Annie are two hot-for-each-other neighbors who can't stand each other. As the sexy tension mounts, so do the explicit encounters! Getting Behind My Horny Neighbor is Book 2 in the enemies-and-lovers ...

Once. Twice. Three times the fun on St. Patrick’s Day. With her shocking red hair and creamy, pale skin, Rhiannon Kelly is every man’s St. Patrick’s Day fantasy. Dressed to kill in a green strapless dress, Sean can’t help but undress his wife before they’ve even left the house. When he leaves her wanting though, it awakens something in her that neither of them will soon forget. Enter a sexy stranger, an ex-boyfriend and his friend and it becomes a St. Paddy’s Day to remember. Transpiring in a hotel room downtown, Rhiannon opens up a whole new world for her husband as she’s ...

It’s the tropical getaway they’ve all been wet dreaming about. After Jackson got his absurd wish, watching his wife with his best friend, his desire to see her with another man has only intensified. But his desire to see her with a woman, not just any woman, her best friend, it has him ready to rip through his swimsuit. Emmie still can’t believe she slept with her ex, in front of her husband. It’s awoken something in her, a longing for more. A longing for her gorgeous best friend, Jessa. It’s so out of character for tame little Emmie, she’s not convinced it’s really her doing ...

Frauen lieben Männer mit Sinn für Humor. Der Mann ist die Stimmungskanone, der im richtigen Moment das Richtige sagt, doch das Problem ist: Wo sind die guten Einzeiler, wenn man sie mal braucht? Dieses Buch bietet den Englischlernenden auf allen Niveaus die Möglichkeit, eine große Auswahl an kurzen, sexy One-Liner-Witzen zu genießen, ohne ständig auf ein Wörterbuch zurückgreifen zu müssen. Das macht Spaß beim Lernen! Und die finden Sie hier. Die besten Einzeiler zum Angeben in der Öffentlichkeit und privat. Alle Einzeiler beziehen sich auf Sex, Frauen und Liebesbeziehungen – das, was jeder hören will. Halten Sie die Sprüche auf Ihrem Kindle, Handy oder Tablet parat und werden Sie zur besten Stimmungskanone. Ihre Dates werden nie wieder wie vorher sein. Auf der Party werden sich sich alle um dich scharen, um die besten Witze nicht zu verpassen. Laden Sie jetzt Ihre Kopie herunter und fangen Sie an zu lachen und Englisch zu lernen!

Whiskey makes her frisky. Everyone's favorite couple, Brooke and Elliot, head to the bar on St Patrick's Day to find her a plaything. Ugh, the life of a hotwife. When she takes the Irishman's 'kiss me I'm Irish' shirt too literally, Brooke finds herself simulating sex in the middle of a crowded bar. Until she's no longer simulating. Taking their encounter to a more private location, Brooke ends the night the way she likes it, covered in the march madness of two men who couldn't be more different than each other. Shamrock surprise! The Irishman: Naughty To Do List is a standalone hotwife ...

Annie is the bane of my existence. The reason why I'm ready to move out of the building. She's that woman. The one you can't stand who you just want to spank and do naughty things to until she repents. So I propose a compromise. Hint - it involves a certain individual getting naked and down on her knees. Turns out Annie's temper isn't the only thing that's hot about her. Just when I think we might be getting along, I learn that Annie doesn't do compromise. But then, neither do I. This explosive, untamed tale will burn up your device. Joel and Annie are two hot-for-each-other neighbors who ...

An artist takes us through his day, from his own particular perspective. A short story from Guys Read: Other Worlds, edited by Jon Scieszka.

“I even got to knock one thing off my bucket list when I traveled to Svalbard and drove a snowmobile over glaciers to an abandoned mining town, all in the name of love.” Business is booming for Tommy, the Norwegian “Viking PI”. Yes, it may be hard to believe, but people are actually choosing to hire this failed crime writer-turned private investigator. And his cases are getting even bigger… and darker. From mysterious buried bodies in unmarked graves, to bare-knuckle brawls and knife fights… Tommy really is finally seeing all that the ‘dark’ underworld of private ...

“I had driven past the second-hand store every day but never been inside. That was a mistake. The moment I crossed the doorstep I knew the shop would be relieving me of my money and time.” Tommy is back again! The failed Norwegian crime author, or “Viking PI” as his clients know him, is (sort of) getting the hang of this whole private investigator thing. “Sort of” being the important part. He’s now getting some ‘real’ cases… if you call missing dogs and cheatings spouses ‘real’. In fact, his most high-profile client so far has been his own daughter and her lost ...

Save 10 lives with a paperclip, discover how a big banana can ruin your sister's holiday, make a new friend with a garbage bin, develop a taste for sheep's spleen and chips, bounce on a vampire's bed, rescue your dad from a dog and a spider, use a toilet roll to get justice, upset the neighbours with a pickaxe, eat a pizza that makes you fearless and imagine a world where teachers earn more money than a rock star.

Mum and Dad are going away on Important Business, so Uncle Ted comes to stay. Before long there's a guinea pig on the loose, Grandad's gone missing and her little brother is stuck in the railings like a giant squeaking tomato! Luckily Uncle Ted's around. He'll come to the rescue...won't he?

Travis: There’s nothing I want more than to please my wife. When she doesn’t hold back from asking for what she wants, I take her arousal in my hands as we fly into Atlanta for yet another friend’s wedding. What she doesn’t know is that I’d rather watch her finish what we started with my best friend. Until I have the guts to tell her. As a plane full of strangers sleep on their early morning flight, I ask Macy to fulfill my biggest fantasy, to sleep with another man while I watch. Not just any man, my best friend, Alan. Macy: I want to make all my husband’s dreams come true, ...

This is the best day of my life, hand’s down. My wife, Violet, and my trainer. The way he looks at her, I knew he had to be the one. I brought up how I wanted to share her, and, to my surprise, she was into it. The things she did to me that night, only showed how interested my wife was in being shared. Dave’s the exact opposite of me, jacked, rugged, confident with a cocky grin to go along with it. She wants to make him submit to her every desire. Dave’s all for it if it means that he can have a night with my wife, beautiful, slim with an ass that just won’t quit. We don’t even ...

From USA Today Bestselling Author May McGoldrick, a heartwarming holiday tale of second chances at love... THANKSGIVING IN CONNECTICUT Talented photographer Paige Coleman has stayed away from her beloved seaside Connecticut village of Stonington ever since being mortified by ‘viral’ YouTube video that captured her in the buff at the top of a whaling ship at Mystic Seaport. Now, four years later, Paige decides that the time has come to face up to her past when her quirky, eighty-six year old grandmother throws the mother of all Thanksgivings to celebrate her recent marriage to ‘...

When Dr. Cline offers Dr. Morrison a large sum of money to take a patient off his hands, it should have been a red flag… but Dr. Morrison disregards it. After all, the patient’s condition is nothing out of the ordinary. How difficult can she be?...