Funny Southern

Do you want to join the ranks of the Intergalactic Diplomatic Corp. but don't know what to do? This book is for you. Learn all the tips and tricks for dealing with aliens across the universe. Start your new career now in the intergalactic diplomatic corp.

Come on in to the Breezy Spoon Diner, where murder is the special of the day! When Dani O'Shea returns to her sleepy little hometown of East Spoon Creek City after a tour in Afghanistan and buys The Breezy Spoon Diner, she plans to live peacefully, serving up great food, great conversation and down-home hospitality to the friendly locals. The Breezy Spoon is a big success, and when hunky and flirtatious fireman Mark Adams offers to rent Dani his downstairs apartment, things are really looking up.... until a dead body with a chocolate pie smashed in his face shows up in the dumpster behind ...

They’ve dedicated their lives to saving others, but can they save themselves? Seventeen years ago, they met while doing emergency response work following Hurricane Rita. Maybe it was adrenaline that brought them together, maybe it was love, but it didn’t matter. It wasn’t meant to be. They lived in different parts of the world. They agreed to share one night, then went their separate ways. Dr. Clara Bownton has spent her entire medical career saving people’s lives and she’s always had a soft spot for Texas. But the years of traveling to disaster sites and war zones have worn her ...

Can this swoon-worthy hero turn Dani's dreams into reality? Sure, Wade Spencer is easy on the eyes, has that Southern charm, and comes from a good family, but Dani has been burned by the like before and she’s not fool enough to try it again. But her little girl sees a potential daddy. Seeing how Wade showers her daughter with all the love the girl’s father has denied her, Dani can’t help but warm up to the idea of giving love another try. Wade has a lot going on—a mother with a life-threatening illness to look after, four younger siblings to keep in line, and a farm to run. That ...

A wedding and a murder...Star football player and NFL hopeful, Michael “Bumper” Hackett is getting married. Word’s going around that it’s a shotgun wedding, and there just might be some truth to it, seeing that the bride-to-be is showing a baby bump. But before the ceremony can even get started, the poor groom collapses from what appears to be an asthma attack. Unfortunately, things aren’t always what they seem. Romaine knew it was a bad idea to have a wedding at the funeral home, but newly elected justice of the peace and sole proprietor of the Ball Funeral Home & Crematorium, ...

Sheriff Gus knows it’s going to be a bad week when he sees Sedric Hedgecock’s breathalyzer score. With a blood alcohol level of 0.62 percent, Hedgecock should be dead. If the breathalyzer’s isn’t on the fritz, Hedgecock’s superhuman. Either way, he’s blind drunk, so off to the county jail he goes. Joining the wannabe Bacchus in Gus’s cells is Jennifer Louis Bachman, awaiting extradition to Kansas on a murder charge. The victim in question is Jennifer’s unborn child, and the murder weapon is an illegal Mexican abortion. With the governor vacillating on whether to extradite, ...

The Sweet Potato Queens like men. They like them so much that they have devoted an absolutely inordinate amount of time to the pursuit of men, marriage, and great sex. And then, when that doesn't work out, they've devoted an inordinate amount of time to divorce, gittin another one and having great sex with him instead. The Sweet Potato Queens' Field Guide to Men is the Queens manifesto on all matters of the heart, featuring tales from Queens around the world, plus the continuing adventures of the women you've come to know and love (and envy just a little bit).

Kate and her best friend Marlene are attending the Palmetto Beach Flea Market in hopes of selling Marlene’s collection of 1950s memorabilia. Fortunately, a table has become available in the busy corridor just outside the circus tent. Unfortunately, the vacant table’s previous occupant died from electrocution when a television set took a dive into his bathtub. The police suspect foul play. And Kate suspects nearly every seller who had a table near the victim—and a motive to put him out of business. - - - - - - - - - - - - - DEATH IS A BARGAIN by Noreen Wald A Henery Press Mystery. If ...

Amy Kate Anderson is Southern trouble in high heels. A Fire— A Murder— What’s happened to her quiet little town of Pine Lake? Book shop owner, Amy Kate Anderson, thought she was having the worse day ever … until they wheeled a body out of the coffee shop next door and her friend, Matt Murphy, co-owner of the Beans and Leaves, became the number one suspect for the DA. Can Amy Kate find a way to help her friend and keep her dreams for her bookshop from going up in smoke? Or will the handsome Lieutenant Gabe Cooper have his way and leave Amy Kate fishing for clues among the ashes? In ...

Birtha Blacktail isn’t your average hunting dog. In fact, she’s not much of a hunting dog at all—unless snoring in the sun and philosophizing from the porch count as skills. She’s big, she’s loyal, and she’s got just enough brainpower to wag when necessary. Alongside her 14-year-old human, Jason, Birtha proves that life doesn’t have to be fast-paced or fancy to be downright extraordinary. Set in the quiet rhythms of rural life, this heartwarming and hilarious tale explores friendship, loyalty, lazy afternoons, and the occasional wild adventure (reluctantly participated in, of ...

This is a two-volume ebook edition of Doreen and Ken Tonks’ amusing, down-to-earth books about their life in southern Spain. Please see individual titles for descriptions and reviews.

He forecasts the weather on TV to the delight of his many fans. But the residents of Ocean Vista Condominiums are less fond of Uncle Weatherwise—the newest arrival at the condo—especially when a hurricane that he predicted would bypass Palmetto Beach instead heads straight for their town. The morning after a frantic evacuation, Kate Kennedy is blown away when she stumbles upon the corpse of Uncle Weatherwise, with a sharpened weather vane pointed in the direction of his heart. Suddenly Kate’s neighbors are her suspects, from a retired Rockette to a former federal prosecutor to a man ...

From Publishers Weekly In his third installment (after A Short History of a Small Place and Off for the Sweet Hereafter of hilarious adventures narrated by young Louis Benfield of Neely, N.C., Pearson again spins a rollicking yarn with somber undertones and reveals himself to be a shrewd social commentator. Essentially the chronicle of the pursuit of a stolen Chevrolet that ends with the murder of a black man, the kernel of the story is embroidered on, digressed from, told and retold with deepening significance each time. Everything that goes on in the real worldincluding the sordid and the...

Zara Bloom’s got 230K followers, a scruffy bay rescue horse named Chaos Theory, and a knack for turning dressage into a millennial TikTok empire—until her bourbon-soaked train wreck of a mom, Darla, crashes the Barn Burners Gala with a thermos of “tea” and a pyrotechnic disaster that’d make a gator blush. Southern Grace Stables was supposed to woo investors with classy demos and a fake fire, not erupt into a glitter-gargling, swamp-siren shitshow featuring Darla’s line-dancing chaos, a rogue chopper pilot named Remy, and a kid who thinks “Auntie Darla” is a superhero. Now ...

At a dinner for Swami Schwartz, the founder of the Palmetto Beach Yoga Institute, the food is fabulous and the dancing is delightful. That is, until Swami two-steps all over Kate Kennedy’s new shoes and then keels over dead after someone spikes his double espresso with cyanide. Who could have poisoned the yogi? Now Kate has to team up with her best friend Marlene to sort through suspects, including a shady business partner and a pretty yoga student—who may have shared more than a lotus position with Swami. - - - - - - - - - - - - - DEATH OF THE SWAMI SCHWARTZ by Noreen Wald A Henery ...

Tired of college, Kate Kennedy’s granddaughter, Katharine, drops out and heads for Florida, landing in the apartment of Kate’s best friend. In her quest for a new life, she takes up with a gang of surfers that go by the name “The Four Boardsmen of the Apocalypse.” But catching waves can be a dangerous pastime. When Katharine’s surfer crush is killed in a shark attack, foul play is suspected, especially by the police. Fingers are pointing at Katharine—including, to Kate’s disappointment, those of her friend Detective Nick Carbone. It’s up to Kate to prove her beloved ...

Hot men, sweet tea, juicy gossip, and good friends. That’s what you’ll find in Willowdale, North Carolina. This box set includes the first three Willowdale short stories that preclude No Foolin’, the first novel in the Willowdale series. Stories include: “A Fine How-De-Do,” “A Little Hanky-Panky,” and “A Perfect Setup.” “A Fine How-De-Do” Short story #1. 17,000 words. It’s been a bad month for Tonya Garcia. After her beloved nonna died, her boyfriend's only sympathy involved big plans for spending her inheritance. Now that he’s out of the picture, Tonya needs a new...

Cassie and Elvis have Magnolia Bay's boardwalk purring like a kitten with fresh cream. With her bookstore thriving and friends by her side, Cassie's newest pride and joy are a pair of fall boots that don't just make folks green with envy—they're brimming with a magic only she knows about. Will they be enough to help her solve the latest murder in Magnolia Bay? The holiday weekend takes a dark turn when a local mom is found murdered. With secrets buried deeper than treasure and an investigation ally spilling them recklessly, danger's now tailing Cassie and her crew like a shadow on a hot ...

Murder’s brewing at Purrs & Puzzles Cat Café—and Purrlock Holmes is on the prowl. Emma Clark traded corporate burnout for sweet tea and cat cuddles, transforming her Great Aunt Josephine’s coffee shop into a cozy Savannah haven. But when socialite Meredith Halloway is found bludgeoned on the café floor, a candlestick nearby, Emma’s dream unravels fast. Whispers of scandal threaten to shutter her doors—until Purrlock, a silver-gray British Shorthair with a Sherlock-sharp nose, sniffs out deceit. With a locket engraved “Truth Endures” as her clue, Emma leads a sleuthing squad ...

A small-town bachelor. A big-city therapist. A second chance at love in the most unexpected place. John “Tater” Davidson is Dent County’s favorite loudmouth. Known for fixing cars, quoting scripture between swear words, and making people laugh until they cry, he hides a bruised heart behind every joke. After being cheated on and divorced not even 90 days after getting hitched, Tater's done with love—and no one blames him. So when a mental health clinic opens just outside town, and the woman leading it turns out to be his ex-girlfriend from years ago—the one who left without saying...