Humor Funny

When the Supreme Being and his son decide that being supreme isn't for them anymore, it's inevitable that things get a bit of a shake-up. It soon becomes apparent that our new owners, the Venturi brothers, have a very different perspective on all sorts of things. Take good and evil, for example. For them, it's an outdated concept that never worked particularly well in the first place.

The Porridge Eaters of Strathclyde A Highland Romance Like No Other! For generations, the McSporrans and the Oatbanes have been at war over the one true way to eat porridge—thick and salted or smooth and honeyed. The feud has raged for centuries, with oatcakes used as weapons and spurtles wielded like swords. But when Fenella McSporran, a fiery lass with a stirring arm strong enough to take down a charging bull, finds herself falling for the enemy, scandal erupts like a pot left to boil over. Hamish Oatbane, a rogueishly handsome warrior with biceps carved from years of porridge-stirring,...

The Boomer Crew's biggest gamble yet! The lads go to Monaco to make their fortune in the casinos; what’s the worst that could happen? Well, Blakey’s car might get trashed, Finley might lose all his money, Geoff and Daisy might break up and Johnny might not make it back to Blighty. Will their wildest gamble yet pay off – or leave them broke and broken? Double Up or Quit is the third laugh-out-loud installment in Peter Seddon’s cozy crime series, packed with his signature wit and the misadventures of the Boomer Crew – Britain’s unlikeliest criminals. Perfect for fans of The ...

Funny quotes are great; they allow us to take a quick break, relax, and take life a bit easier. And who doesn’t need those in today’s hectic life? Whether you are looking for an innovative way to cheer yourself up and deal with the daily stresses, stay focused and motivated, or simply trying to find a fantastic gift for a friend or a loved one, 500 Funny Quotes for Women could be a perfect choice!

Sunday Times bestselling author Vernon Coleman travels through England, from Sidmouth in the south, to Buxton in the north. In this offbeat travel book with a difference the author is looking for evidence that England and the English are still alive, kicking and eccentric. He travels to Taunton, Wells, Lacock, Cheltenham, Hereford, Stratford upon Avon, Bakewell and Buxton. He visits Stroud, Gloucester and Eyam and meets some extraordinary characters. On the way he investigates cheese rolling and shin kicking and discovers the difference between a city and a town. He reveals the surprising ...

What can you do when an enemy claims sanctuary in your home? Hester Johnson is no one's favorite person, but when she arrives at Proctor House begging to be hidden, the Proctor family takes her in. When something spooks Hester, she runs away - straight into her killer. Is it coincidence she's left on Isabella's door? The danger has never been greater for Detective Palmer and Isabella needs to protect him, find the murderer, and keep her family's secrets. For fans of Samantha Silver, Amanda M. Lee, and Leighann Dobbs, On a Larkspur is a clever, fast-paced cozy mystery that will keep you ...

Something is up with Lorcan. And I’m fairly sure I’m not just imagining things—he’s been distracted, working later than usual, appears exhausted, and was that vanilla perfume I smelled on him? Regardless of what’s going on with the undead nuisance, I’ve got my own problems to deal with. Namely, I’ve been pinpointed as the main suspect in a murder! I know—as if I have the time or the interest to kill someone. Ridiculous. Anyway, before this situation gets any worse, I need to prove my innocence, stat. Just how am I going to do that? Stick around and find out…

Everyone remembers the fabulous rhyming stories of old Mother Goose from their childhood, but did you know that she's kept a dark, haunting secret for many long years? Mother Goose is not all she seems to be. Oh, sure, during the daylight hours when the birds are singing and children are laughing, Mother Goose is friendly and wonderful and proper. But when the darkness falls and the coyote calls, that old goose turns into something much less loveable…much more sinister…forever known to the world as Granny Gruesome!

After being together for 10 years, Sylvie and Dan have all the trimmings of a happy life and marriage; they have a comfortable home, fulfilling jobs, and beautiful twin girls and communicate so seamlessly, they finish each other's sentences. However, a trip to the doctor projects they will live another 68 years together, and panic sets in. They never expected "until death do us part" to mean seven decades. In the name of marriage survival, they quickly concoct a plan to keep their relationship fresh and exciting.

An all-new collection of eight "Vampire for Hire" short stories featuring everyone's favorite vampire detective, Samantha Moon! It’s all inside, including: Vampire Requiem - Samantha Moon gets up close and personal with her dead ex-husband’s mistress, Nancy, who might be a woman who knows too much. Moon Love - Sam and Kingsley Fulcrum set their sights on a romantic weekend getaway to Big Bear, California, only to find themselves on the hunt for a runaway boy. Moon Musings - Sam is back and... blogging? Turns out the vampire mama has a lot to say on the subject of life, death, and ...

Someone just threatened my life— And I couldn't be happier. Miles Cross is my boss—and my temporary body guard. Gruff, stoic, and stern, he’s also the man of my dreams. I’ve saved all of my firsts for the day he makes a move. Everyone knows how much I love him. Everyone except Miles. But nobody understands the Cross brothers like I do. I’ll wait as long as it takes to crack that rough and stony exterior. Now a mystery stalker is leaving me threatening notes. I should be terrified. Instead, I’ve never been more excited. Because Miles has vowed to keep me safe— And I’m not ...

The problem with books on how to raise kids is that all those other authors have PhDs, MDs, or kids. Luckily this author has none of those limiting factors. Instead, you get hilarious advice based on observations and assumptions with zero evidence. It’s advice that will help you be the best parent you can be whether you have a real job, a fancy job, or a trust fund. Learn the secrets to: Picking a Favorite Winning Kindergarten How to Hide from the Kids Sharing Aggressive Driving for Teens ...and much more terrible advice

The stories in this work include parodies of long-standing genres and original tales of irreverent occurrence. Each story involves humor that neither conforms to political correctness or social standards of good taste. These stories are not for the weak-hearted. These stories are for adults and include profanity, violence, sex, degenerate behavior, and spectacular drama and action. You may even find a moral or two thrown in somewhere amongst them. If you do, it was completely accidental. Found in this esteemed collection are these gems: Lust For Luscious Sherlock Jerkweed and the Case of ...

Funny Business is based around the theme of - what else? - humor, and if you’re familiar with Jon and the Guys Read Library, you already know what you’re in store for: 10 hilarious stories from some of the funniest writers around. Before you’re through, you’ll meet a teenage mummy; a kid desperate to take a dip in the world’s largest pool of chocolate milk; a homicidal turkey; parents who hand over their son’s room to a biker; and more.

Read all of Cindy Blackburn's Cozy Mysteries for FREE with Kindle Unlimited! Small sleuth, tiny town, unfailing fun. Welcome to Lake Elizabeth, Vermont, where the water is blue, the mountains are green, and Cassie Baxter is going nuts. Who wouldn’t go nuts in a town this size? What possessed Cassie to move in with her father? And why do they have to live next door to a mad scientist? A sexy mad scientist. Does such a thing even exist? And speaking of existing, what happened to the dead redhead? You know, the one Cassie found, and then lost? What’s up with that? Cassie Baxter intends to ...

Izzy, her boyfriend, and her holiday-crashing neighbor, Etta, are off to the driest, flattest, and most infertile inhabited continent on earth - where even the cutest of creatures might try to kill you. But that’s only the beginning of their problems. A Taste Society courier goes missing. And 26 hours after Izzy lands in Australia, a crocodile is found dead. With a human corpse inside. Not quite the start to her relaxing holiday she’d been hoping for.

She pretends to be pious, but she’s about to be corrupted. Hank: Maribel Andrews, aka “The Church Lady”, has fascinated me for as long as I can remember. I’ve always wondered if those prim outfits and severe hairstyles hid a secret passion. Little did I know that Maribel had a kinky side, one I longed to dominate… Maribel: For years I was the “good girl”, doing what was expected of me. I saved myself for marriage, turned a blind eye to my husband’s cheating, and faithfully went to church every week to pray for my salvation. But following the rules didn’t keep me from ...

Paranormal Women’s Fiction from #1 Amazon bestseller, J.R. Rain, and New York Times bestseller, H.P. Mallory! When Poppy accidentally breaks her bedroom mirror, she has no idea the bad luck she’s in for! With just about everything going wrong, Poppy’s first order of business is to reverse the curse of the broken mirror ASAP! Unfortunately for her, though, that’s not quite how the cosmos work. Saddled with a serious case of misfortune, imagine Poppy’s surprise when one of her clients walks into her store with yet another mirror! This one isn’t cursed, though. It’s haunted. The ...

When a friend needs help... you drop everything for them. Isabella's apartment building has suffered because she lives there. In one year, her landlord has put up iron railings on the windows, revamped the entire security system, and refurbished the entire inside because someone tried to burn her out of the building. When he needed her to prove his son was innocent she agreed without needing to know any of the details. Once she started digging into the case, she started to have second thoughts. Add in the tensions between the witches in the Sorority of Brigid all aimed at her, and she's got...

"I have seen people swarm around you like bees on a honeycomb", says martin to his old friend Jimmy, "what is it that you give them, which makes them like you so much? There certainly must be something interesting they are getting from you, can I get a piece of that too? Please tell me something funny, it could be anything, a story, a joke, a riddle, a phrase, just anything," pleads martin with now reluctant Jimmy, "all right then", replies the latter, just remember that I am no Comedian, hold your ears wide open, and be ready to laugh at anything I do or say, deal or no deal?" "yeah you ...