Humor Funny

Have you ever wondered why we say, “It’s raining cats and dogs” and other funny old sayings like, “Don’t look a gift horse in the mouth”? Often we know what they mean, but do we know where they originated? Well in this book, you are about to find out! For example, when we want to wish someone a good nights sleep, people often say, “Night night, sleep tight.” Who would have thought that this dates back to Shakespeare’s time, when mattresses were secured onto a bed frame by ropes. In order to make the bed firmer and more comfortable, people would have to pull on the ropes to...

The last thing I expected during Bramble Dale’s big debut cook-off was a dead food critic face-first in a plate of my best friends winning but fatal almond chicken. It was an and accident because she wouldn’t poison him on purpose. Really? Now I’m knee-deep in flour, lies, and a whole lot of bad alibis, trying to figure out who really wanted this foodie dead. Between his baking co-star girlfriend stealing the show and a rival food critic cutting into his review columns this harsh baking judge had more enemies than a guy could choke on. With my pet detective yellow Lab, Peanut, and my ...

Stephanie Plum is thinking her career as a fugitive apprehension agent has run its course. She's been shot at, spat at, cussed at, fire-bombed, mooned, and attacked by dogs. Time for a change, Stephanie thinks. Time to find the kind of job her mother can tell her friends about without making the sign of the cross. So Stephanie Plum quits. Resigns. No looking back. No changing her mind. She wants something safe and normal. As it turns out, jobs that are safe and normal for most people aren't necessarily safe and normal for Stephanie Plum.

What’s worse than a self-centered beauty queen? A cruise chock full of them! “Winters will have you giggling into your book!” But what if the self-centred beauty queen is also a murderer? When the Swan of the Seas hosts a beauty pageant, Adrienne is forced to spend her time dealing with narcissistic judges, oblivious contestants and a feminist protest. The event seems hectic enough, when Diana Penn, the esteemed beauty queen and headlining judge, is found murdered! Now, it’s up to Adrienne and her friends Cece, Sam, and First Officer Hot Stuff—er, First Officer Ethan Lee—to sort...

Brooklyn: This is not how I envisioned meeting Beauregard Addison Jr. I’ve been obsessed with him for as long as I can remember. There are so many rumors about him that it’s hard to distinguish fact from fiction. He only sleeps four hours a night. He spends more time on the company jet than he does on the ground. His work ethic is almost as big as his…endowment. I’ve clawed, scrimped, and saved up enough to get an interview as an intern at his company: Someday Came. But I’m having the worst morning of my life. Almost got run over. Spilled my Starbucks. Running late for the chance ...

This fun paranormal cozy mystery collection contains all three novella episodes in the Mail-Order Witch series. "A Little Romantic Charmer." -- Kindle Reviewer The town's children are turning into foxes. And the magic shop is infested with hamsters. But that’s just a normal day at Ettie’s Enchanted Effects. When Ettie agreed to be a mail-order witch and move to Watersedge, she dreamt of a loving husband, a supportive family, and a cute town. Instead, she got a secretive father-in-law and a city who clearly doesn’t want witches in their community. Luckily, she did get that loving ...

Four children's Great books, all rolled into one. best for bedtime stories beginner / early reader poetry for kids. best animals stories, value tales

When pets investigate, you can be sure the fur will fly. When two kids go missing on Hallowe’en, the task of finding them provokes a Buster versus Amber challenge. The dog can follow the scent, but the cat will use her brains. Who will find the children first? And where are they anyway? But Felicity’s pets aren’t the only ones trying to solve this case. Her niece, Mindy, is out in the dark too. There’s a mob forming outside a suspiciously derelict and overgrown house, but is the lady inside really a witch? In the ultimate test of feline against canine and pets against humans, who ...

In a new addition to the New York Times best-selling series that's as popular as it is dorky, Nikki Maxwell is determined to help out her crush! Nikki Maxwell isn't at all surprised to find out that her crush, Brandon, volunteers at a local animal shelter. He's such a sweet guy - of course he wants to help those adorable puppies! Then Brandon tells her that the shelter is in danger of closing, and Nikki knows she can't let that happen. Especially when she discovers a shocking secret about Brandon that makes keeping that shelter open more important than ever.

Nikki’s juggling a lot this month. A reality TV crew is following Nikki and her friends as they record their hit song together, plus there are voice lessons, dance practice, and little sister Brianna’s latest wacky hijinks. Nikki’s sure she can handle everything, but will all the excitement cause new problems for Nikki and Brandon, now that cameras are everywhere Nikki goes?

Twelve-year-old Norman Foreman and his best friend, Jax, are a legendary comedic duo in waiting, with a plan to take their act all the way to the Edinburgh Fringe. But when Jax dies, Norman decides the only fitting tribute is to perform at the festival himself. The problem is, Norman’s not the funny one. Jax was.

It’s not forever. It’s not freaking forever. 5 Stars - "Laughs galore, love in the air, crazy ghosts, and a diabolical mom add up to a great read! Welcome back to Knotty the only singles town in America. Seeing ghosts, talking houses, witches, and kooky old ladies make for a fun, quick read." What’s a witch to do when her magic’s been hacked and her tongue wickedly cursed! No matter how hard Eloise Redd concentrates on keeping her thoughts to herself, she blurts them. The only option is to lie low and wait for the hacker’s ransom note —and hope the demands aren’t too steep. In...

This short satirical book takes a brief and satirical look at lesbian history and culture, from fashion to queer celebrities and from coming out to how lesbians have sex, this guide will not only educate you on the ways of LGBT women, but it will also have you laughing with every page. "Such a funny read - literally belly laughed through it. Raw, real and hilarious insight into the world of coming out and living your life as a lady lover" For more funny lesbian and feminist blogs visit www.jennawimshurst.com

Corrected and updated edition - November 5, 2024 Previously published as Caught by the Pitcher: The steamy and hilarious new runaway bride sports romcom by Biki Ash The spicy and hilarious new runaway bride sports romcom with a hunky sports star, curvy girl, age gap, and guaranteed HEA ending. Perfect for fans of Stephanie Archer and Elle Kennedy! If a hunky baseball star offered to give you anything you desired, what would you ask for? Jenny Mom told me I should accept my boyfriend’s proposal and settle down, raise a family, have a good life. She didn’t say anything about him cheating ...

While he's not quite a household name, most people would consider H. Jon Benjamin, the voice-actor star of Archer and Bob's Burgers (and a sentient can of mixed vegetables in 2015's Wet Hot American Summer) a comedy show business success. But he'd like to remind everyone that as great as success can be, failure is also an option. In a hilarious, self-deprecating memoir, Jon lays out some of his many failures in all areas of life, from Work ("wherein I'm unable to deliver a sizzling fajita") to Family ("wherein a trip to PF Chang's fractures a family").

Sometimes, you have to get lost to find what you're looking for. When Carmela 'CJ' Jones's love life goes from "I do" to "I don't think so," she swaps wedding bells for seashells and heads to Cocoa Reef Resort for some soul-searching. But instead of finding inner peace, she finds Keston Kips—the infuriatingly handsome mixologist who seems to have a PhD in getting under her skin. Their tropical tango includes a series of hilarious mix-ups, leading them to an unexpected adventure on a deserted island. Stranded with nothing but their wits and a growing attraction they can't ignore, CJ and ...

Are you fed up of reading the same old tired jokes? One-liners that bore you to death? Then here is a set of jokes that are fresh and hilarious. We have tried to avoid one-liners and present only substantial jokes that makes one to laugh. They are also good to illustrate a point in public speeches and classroom situations. [This 3rd edition is almost 80 kindle pages long. It is wrongly auto-listed by Amazon as 56 pages] Here are a few salient points: *** We have tried to select jokes that are mostly uncommon *** We have evaluated each joke by narrating it to our friends *** We have tried to...

A small town, shy curvy girl romantic comedy. Violet I’m happy living alone with my cat and my romance novels until I meet Sean. He unlocks something inside of me, a longing, a craving that I need to satisfy. I think I can spend one night with him and then walk away. It’s the fairest thing to do, no matter how wrong it feels. Because once he knows the truth about me, he won’t want to stick around. Sean I’ve always wanted to be a father, and when I meet the sweet librarian with the killer curves, I think I’ve found the perfect woman to start my life with. We have one night together...

A Cupcakes-And-Crime Caper Roger Owen’s business isn’t doing well, and when he takes his wife and son to glitzy, glamorous Las Vegas for some quality family vacation time, he brings along a surprising +1: his mistress! "Winters will have you giggling into your book!" Life seems to pick up for Roger when he wins a huge jackpot… until someone gleefully kills him on the casino floor. Caught in the hot seat as suspect number one, Roger’s wife Wendy hires Tiffany and Ian to clear her name and to solve the mystery of who really killed Roger Owen—even though it may very well be black ...

I fell in love with Mr. Darcy on a reality TV show. Cue the happily ever after. Can you believe it? Me, Emma Brady, the girl who managed to turn reality TV humiliation into a real-life fairy tale, has fallen head over heels for my own Mr. Darcy while the entire nation watched. Yep, I'm the living proof that even the most unlikely of matches can light up the screen. And guess what? Hold onto your tiaras because now my Mr. Darcy has gone and proposed, complete with a promise of happily ever after in his posh English manor. Cue the confetti cannons and unicorns, right? Not so fast. Life ...