Humorous Horror

It’s bad enough that its venom-dripping chelicerae can slice through flesh like warm butter. Worse? It’s right there under the bunk. It’s a fact now. To make it through the night, the children must obey the rules: don’t get out of bed, stay out of the shadows, and don’t wake the beast. But as the threats multiply, so do the rules of survival. And with the safety of dawn still hours away, the fun is just beginning.

In this clever and quirky follow-up to The Gates and The Infernals, Samuel Johnson's life seems to have finally settled down - after all, he's still got the company of his faithful dachshund Boswell and his bumbling demon friend Nurd; he has foiled the dreaded forces of darkness not once but twice; and he's now dating the lovely Lucy Highmore.

Nate Temple has gotten away with a lot in recent years: cow-tipping the Minotaur, decimating a gang of weredragons, sucker punching angels, and eating pancakes with the Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse. He’s kidnapped one of the most powerful wizards on the planet and slaughtered the Brothers Grimm. Lady Luck has been very good to Nate Temple…until now. Nate's good fortune has turned, catching the attention of a recruiter - the kind of person who offers jobs that can’t be refused.

I wanted my BFF’s hot brother to be my first... And my best friend’s brother became my first… just like I wanted, but he would come into my life later… for another first… a visit from a stranger that leads to an unexpected threesome Years later I met up with him with a stranger, his best friend, and that led to another first: My First Threesome! By then, I was with Paul, and things were complicated in a whole new way… Full version of the story published in its entirety for the first time. Includes: First Time… Untouched… Threesome… MFM...Oral… Backdoor… More!

Special Price! For a Limited Time: Only .99 cents - Regular Price $2.99 - Save two bucks while offer lasts! Bryce’s girlfriend’s best friend makes him an offer he can’t refuse… Now all he has to do is find a way to accept her offer - and not get caught! What can when the LAST thing he wants to happen HAPPENS? The Offer: excerpt: Bryce gets an offer he can’t refuse - “Ahhh, I must’ve fallen asleep,” she said drowsily, suppressing a little yawn. “Why didn’t you wake me?” “You were sleeping so peacefully, I thought you could use the rest after your hard day,” I lied. ...

Anatole France (1844-1924) was a French poet, journalist, and novelist who wrote several best sellers. The Revolt of the Angels is a mischievous take on the theology of modern society; it chronicles the thoughts of Arcade, a lowly guardian angel, as he discovers the ugly truths of his divine master in the library of his human charge As Maurice, the young man abandoned by Arcade, struggles to get his guardian back, one gets a view of a wide variety of the author’s artistic personalities, most of whom are fallen angels.

Finally available as an audiobook, Joyce Carol Oates' lost classic: a satirical, often surreal, and beautifully plotted Gothic romance that follows the exploits of the audacious Zinn sisters, whose 19th-century pursuit of adventurous lives turns a lens on contemporary American culture.

Fed up with her wild behavior, 16-year-old Lex’s parents ship her off to upstate New York to live with her Uncle Mort for the summer, hoping that a few months of dirty farm work will whip her back into shape. But Uncle Mort’s true occupation is much dirtier than shoveling manure. He’s a Grim Reaper. And he’s going to teach Lex the family business. She quickly assimilates into the peculiar world of Croak, a town populated by reapers who deliver souls from this life to the next.

Jaunty the Clown just wants to entertain families with lighthearted slapstick antics, but people think of clowns as terrifying, nightmarish creatures who hide in closets or under beds. When Jaunty, along with his fellow performers, are fired from the circus, they're told that the world just doesn't like clowns anymore. Still, clowns have to eat. And since these clowns don't eat children, to make ends meet they're eventually forced to take a job in a popular haunted attraction, the Mountain of Terror. But millions of oversized spiders are about to invade....

My name is Frank Moon, and I’m in way over my head. We’ve settled in Sanctuary, a neighborhood on the edge of Gatlinburg, Tennessee. Having endured gut-wrenching emotional trials and hordes of inhuman enemies, I’ve rapidly become the leader of a small, yet ever-growing, community of survivors. With supplies thinning, I reluctantly agree to return to town for the first time in weeks. My wife and I run into more than just a multitude of murderous monsters. We’re forced into a war between two well-armed human factions. One of the parties is hellbent on claiming Gatlinburg for ...

When her daughter Lotte was born, Dani had welcomed the chance to be a stay-at-home mother. To be good at something, for once. But now Dani can’t stop thinking about her seemingly healthy husband, Clark, dropping dead. Not because she hates him (not right now, anyway) but because it’s become abundantly clear to Dani that if he dies, she and Lotte will be left destitute. And then Dani discovers The Temple.

Nobody likes getting bullied, and Donny has had enough. Deciding to take matters into his own hands, he solicits the help of the old Asian man at the end of his street to teach him Karate. During a grueling two days of training, Donny earns belt after belt, until he finally becomes a Karate Master.

Meet the new, improved Andrew Mayhem. He has a real job. He’s a better father and husband. And he’s vowed to quit accepting money from strange women in coffee shops to perform tasks that go terribly, terribly wrong. This time, he’s just taking a relaxing camping trip with his family and best friend. No shortcuts. The gas tank is full. The sinister warning of the crazy old man is taken seriously. Unfortunately, when you’re Andrew Mayhem, you just can’t help being attacked by a group of savage killers bent on inflicting ghastly torture and bringing horrific death.

In this gloriously over-the-top tale, Aoyama, a widower who has lived alone with his son ever since his wife died seven years before, finally decides it is time to remarry. Since Aoyama is a bit rusty when it comes to dating, a filmmaker friend proposes that, in order to attract the perfect wife, they do a casting call for a movie they don't intend to produce. As the resumes pile up, only one of the applicants catches Aoyama's attention - Yamasaki Asami - a striking young former ballerina with a mysterious past. But she is a far cry from the innocent young woman he imagines her to be.

OMG! What have I done?! A young conservative wife does something she never dreamed she'd do in a million years: She sleeps with her husband's best friend! A hot soldier teaches her a few new tricks . . . But it goes way beyond that . . . When her husband's best friend stays over while her husband is away ... Kim cannot believe what happens next! Apprx. 12,000 words Previously published in two volumes as Stretched By My Husband's Best Friend. Includes: vaginal / oral / backdoor / fisiting

All Nick wants to do is take his dying father for a perfect father-son weekend in the Scottish Highlands. It’s not much to ask, is it? A log cabin, a roaring fire, a bottle of fine whiskey, and two days to paper over the cracks in their relationship. However, Nick didn’t plan on making the trip with a dead neighbour in the back of his car. Or the neighbour’s dog. He really didn’t plan on being pursued by a psychotic female assassin intent on collecting body parts.

After discovering and embracing her role in the story, Sunny works as a professional final girl for the Giallo Project taking down maniac slashers so they can be shipped away to Psycho Island. While the work is bloody and often painful, Sunny is good at it, and she rests easy knowing that, as the major character, she is in relatively little danger. Her biggest worry is that her story is growing stale. That all changes, however, when a new character is introduced; Dakota Bleu is everything Sunny is not, and when the two are paired up for a challenging mission, Sunny wonders if her time in ...

Northelm Boarding School on Lake Placid has the worst bully of all - a demon by the name of Hatchet Jack. M.J. Holliday, along with her partners Gilley and the handsome Dr. Steven Sable, are ready to send him back to the portal from whence he came. The school's summer construction, an uncooperative dean, and the very tempting Dr. Delicious are all trying to distract M.J. from her ghost hunting.

A collection of stories: The Possessed Printer Blues: A woman buys a printer at a yard sale. The Long Day Sun: A photography student helps out a friend. Savory Taro Pudding: A short nightmare based on true events. Billionaire Babies: It turns out you can't trust billionaires. Bath Salts Vampire: Teen girls with low self-esteem + a drug dealer who thinks he's an ancient vampire. What could go wrong?

An old Gypsy warns a farmer that he has the mark of the wolf. The Baron allows his son to take a holiday and then invites the wrong person into his giant castle. Nothing ever goes right for the Count, and he gets no respect. Eric fears werewolves, but it's his father he should fear. When classic horror meets tongue-in-cheek parody, the result is The Wood Chucker, a tale full of fond digs at the horror genre. Young heroes Woody, Sean, and Nellie span continents to team up with each other, and Karen, a reluctant Vampire set on revenge against the inept Vampire who turned her. Along the way, ...