Humorous Horror

OMG! What have I done?! A young conservative wife does something she never dreamed she'd do in a million years: She sleeps with her husband's best friend! A hot soldier teaches her a few new tricks . . . But it goes way beyond that . . . When her husband's best friend stays over while her husband is away ... Kim cannot believe what happens next! Apprx. 12,000 words Previously published in two volumes as Stretched By My Husband's Best Friend. Includes: vaginal / oral / backdoor / fisiting

All Cadence wanted was a one-night sleep, but when he slept, he fought demons in his dreams. They were demons that terrorized the human world. In his battles, he would use his sword called Ethereal to send them back to hell, where they had escaped from. But now the demons were quiet. They were no longer in his dreams. The demons are now attacking him on earth, letting him know the blue-purple flame is coming for him. Cadence stumbles on an ancient three-headed dagger from his past. The three witches are using the dagger to kill young women, collecting their blood. Why do they need the blood...

Der Kleinkriminelle Sascha Nebel hat sich zur falschen Zeit am falschen Ort das falsche Auto für einen Diebstahl ausgesucht. Kaum, dass er hinter dem Steuer eines Geländewagens Platz genommen hat, zieht eine Horde demonstrierender Klimaaktivisten durch die Straße. Allen voran eine junge Frau, die den SUV mit einer Baseballkeule demoliert. Als die Polizei auf der Bildfläche erscheint, ergreifen Sascha und die Unbekannte die Flucht und platzen in den Elternabend einer 5. Klasse. Um die Nacht nicht in Polizeigewahrsam zu verbringen, bleibt ihnen keine andere Wahl.

Stories contained in this volume: "The Enterprising Necromancer":In the town of Name Pending, Wyoming, Elijah Potbury does brisk business as the territory's only practicing necromancer. For a reasonable fee, he'll raise any friend or family member. When a local rancher complains of his newly resurrected ranch hand being defective and demands a full refund, Potbury refuses to comply. The incident is reported to the town marshal, who investigates. "Low Noon": Potbury the necromancer sends out an invitation to out-of-town gunfighters to challenge his own shootist, the late Nat McGrue. McGrue ...

Messina, Noah, and I headed off to Chicago for a little TLC involving "stumping" some vampires. While in the Windy City, the cannibals blew back into our path, and everything started going downhill from there. A rest-stop massacre, Stacks' penchant for getting his ass in a sling, a drunk witch armed with a tube of cookie dough, firebombing explosions, Tom Waits, a hunter dive bar, demonic kid hitchhikers, throwing bodies in dumpsters, and run-ins with two of my exes.

The time is the early '80s. The characters go to the same schools and eat at the same restaurants. Their voices enfold us as seamlessly as those of DJs heard over a car radio. They have sex with the same boys and girls and buy from the same dealers. In short, they are connected in the only way people can be in that city.

Matteo, an aerospace engineer, returns home after working on a recovered spacecraft, expecting a sense of accomplishment. However, an unsettling feeling gnaws at him, and he can't shake the sense that something is amiss. Despite a reassuring doctor's report declaring his health normal, Matteo's unease persists. As he succumbs to exhaustion and drifts into sleep, Matteo awakens to a reality beyond comprehension. No longer in his own body, he finds himself inhabiting the unfamiliar form of another being. Bewildered and disoriented, he discovers the shocking truth: his body has been hijacked ...

Meet Andy Warner, a recently deceased everyman and newly minted zombie. Resented by his parents, abandoned by his friends, and reviled by a society that no longer considers him human, Andy is having a bit of trouble adjusting to his new existence. But all that changes when he goes to an Undead Anonymous meeting and finds a kindred soul in Rita, an impossibly sexy recent suicide with a taste for the formaldehyde in cosmetic products.

A provocative collection of intriguing, sexy, disturbing and original stories, wide-ranging in scope and theme. Cosmic countdown to oblivion. Quirky sexual hang-ups. Disturbed, obsessive characters unable to cope with life, and living in worlds of their own. Romantic, heart-breaking tales. Stories of madness and murder. Introspective, unashamed dissection of the human mind and spirit. More than enough variety to engage you, excite you, scare you, intrigue you, torment you…

In the town of Name Pending, Wyoming, Elijah Potbury does brisk business as the territory's only practicing necromancer. For a reasonable fee, he'll raise any friend or family member. Stories contained in this volume: "The Automatons Who Ate Lead": After convincing Potbury to resurrect two disembodied brains that are to be transplanted into automatons, the diabolical Mr. Seven uses them to kidnap Miss Henrietta. Potbury, with the help of his faithful gun hand, the late Nat McGrue, does everything in his power to thwart the scheming airship owner. "The Hatching of the Wolf Spider": The Wolf ...

Finally available as an audiobook, Joyce Carol Oates' lost classic: a satirical, often surreal, and beautifully plotted Gothic romance that follows the exploits of the audacious Zinn sisters, whose 19th-century pursuit of adventurous lives turns a lens on contemporary American culture.

In this story from the novel, “SuperHero – Retirement”, retired SuperHeroes discover a teen with Super abilities, who for secretive family reasons is unable to attend the SuperCharterSchool. So, they decide to train him.

From the publisher of Pride and Prejudice and Zombies comes a new tale of romance, heartbreak, and tentacled mayhem. Sense and Sensibility and Sea Monsters expands the original text of the beloved Jane Austen novel with all-new scenes of giant lobsters, rampaging octopi, two-headed sea serpents, and other biological monstrosities.

Jaunty the Clown just wants to entertain families with lighthearted slapstick antics, but people think of clowns as terrifying, nightmarish creatures who hide in closets or under beds. When Jaunty, along with his fellow performers, are fired from the circus, they're told that the world just doesn't like clowns anymore. Still, clowns have to eat. And since these clowns don't eat children, to make ends meet they're eventually forced to take a job in a popular haunted attraction, the Mountain of Terror. But millions of oversized spiders are about to invade....

-Extraordinary encounters. Unexpected humor. Endless challenges. Life-threatening diseases. Unthinkable trauma.- Welcome to STAT: Crazy Medical Stories as told by the healthcare professionals themselves. From peculiar conditions and mysterious ailments to remarkable recoveries and perplexing medical mysteries, Stat: Crazy Medical Stories, draws from real-life accounts. Each chapter unveils crazy medical cases as narrated by the healthcare professionals themselves. The stories take you on a captivating journey across various disciplines, including general medicine, surgery, psychiatry, and ...

On the outside, luxury real estate agent Sarah Nelson looks like every other mom in the suburb. But she has an edge that others don’t: She’s a witch. And no one knows . . . except her estranged ex-coven and college friends, Katrina and Alicia. One terrible night during their freshman year, the trio accidentally burned down their dorm, and soon after they scattered. Their secret had been safe, until Sarah learns they’ve been invited back to commemorate the anniversary of the fire.

Dustin Graves has three days to live. The darkling mage has found himself in the company of scoundrels. Maybe that’s what Dustin deserves: a werewolf, a vampire, and a talking sword for teammates, and a rogue sorcerer as his mentor and master. But a doomsday cult has surfaced. Twelve mutilated bodies are found drowned in blood and in wine. The massacre stinks of both the divine and the supernatural. Worst of all, an ancient god sends Dust on a lethal mission, one he must complete in three days. The reward? He gets to live. Well...maybe.

In this dark and hilarious new adventure, Andrew has started up a private investigation business with his best friend Roger (slogan: "We Solve Weird Problems"). Since his options in life will become somewhat more limited after his wife Helen gives birth to triplets, it's his last-ditch effort to get out of being stuck with a corporate day job. One of their first clients is an attractive woman named Shirley. Keeping with the kind of luck Andrew has had his entire life, her problem is: "I think I may be a serial killer".

Why would a mother murder her four children with a smile on her face? What sinister end awaits the regulars of the local watering hole? When Beverly Havermore rubs elbows with other members of high society, what ghosts from her past come to haunt her? Could a curse be behind the mysterious speech problems plaguing an otherwise healthy Benjamin Anatole? The answers to these alarming questions can be found in this collection of seventeen nerve-racking, and at times darkly humorous, short stories that are guaranteed to chill the bones of even the most sensible reader. From a man choosing ...

The ancient pact between mankind, heaven, and hell has been broken, and Nate Temple’s quest for vengeance may have just kicked off Armageddon. So, time to grab a stiff drink…or maybe four. Already plagued with night terrors that could qualify him as a card-carrying insomniac, Nate can barely even manage to put on his pants in the morning, let alone pick teams for the Apocalypse. But when he’s framed as a demon sympathizer, condemned by the Armies of Heaven, and hunted down by both his allies and the Four Horsemen, this wizard doesn’t think it can get any worse.