Humorous Noir

Shirley Lyle hooks for a living. She’s a big girl who keeps her profile low. But when a drug lord and his son toss her trailer, she adds a couple letters to her name. Now, she’s killed the drug lord’s son and two meth zombies. Fed up, ready to set fire to her past, her job - and her trailer - she’s dragged back into the role she’s forsworn by a man who presses her buttons with a hammer. Shirley realizes she’ll never be more than a 400-pound hooker. But when her partner-in-revolution, Ulyana the Ukrainian stripper, disappears, Shirley puts flame to fuse.

Gorn Nagurski is a retired cop, he married into money, and he is pretty sure everybody is out to kill him. His position as a security consultant takes him to Kingston, Jamaica. Life is good. Until he discovers terrorists are skulking around his island. Gorn is not happy. He calls on a secret network of retired and active duty police, military, and intelligence officers to step in and help thwart a potential terrorist attack. The result is gunfights in the streets, shoot-outs in the Caribbean Sea, and a full scale war in California. Good times, except... everybody is trying to kill him.

A PRIVATE EYE IS WARNED OFF A CASE HE DOESN'T KNOW ABOUT! Alton Rhode was sitting in his office minding his business when a gunman walked in and shot up the place. He told the private eye he would come back and kill him, if he pursued the Frank Pace case. Since Rhode didn't know anyone named Frank Pace, and in fact had no clients at the time, he wasn't really worried about what was an obvious case of mistaken Identity. But later, a nun walked in and said she was looking for her brother, Frank Pace. He was about to hire Rhode but had been murdered, and his body misplaced. Then, things really...

Resourceful Bingo Riggs and his partner, Handsome Kusak, are in the sucker-bait business, snapping candid pics of tourists off Central Park. Their fly-by-night enterprise can be irresistible to souvenir lovers, but with one camera in a pawnshop and their developing room in the bathtub of a two-room dump near Hell’s Kitchen, their venture is wretchedly underexposed - until they stumble upon an insurance fraud scheme between the allegedly dead eccentric Mr. S. S. Pigeon and his business partner and beneficiary.

A team of con artists travel the country, marrying rich, unsought women, only to clean them out on their wedding night. The only problem is their last mark's father happens to be a secret underworld kingpin now bent on avenging his homely daughter's broken heart. After Angie Robertson’s new husband disappears with over $200,000 in wedding gifts and a brand new 911 Porsche convertible, her gangster father makes it his mission to seek retribution. Alongside him is Angie’s brother and heir to the Robertson empire, Sebastian, who, like his father, is eager to enact a swift revenge. ...

Rock star Castor Greaves and his model girlfriend vanished twenty years ago after an infamous gig in Soho. According to urban myth they’re still alive - holed up somewhere by the Golden Road, a fabled music-industry 'disappearing' service - so when PI Kenny Gabriel is hired to solve the notorious case, he knows he’ll need to watch his back. But Kenny’s life is in danger already: a brain tumour is messing with his mind, and he may well have nothing to lose. Stalking the seedy clubs and backstreets of Soho, he makes a gruesome discovery....

Is someone systematically killing the judges called to the British Columbian bar? At least one has been murdered and several have disappeared. Arthur Beauchamp returns from retirement once again to take on the case, this time defending his former nemesis, backwoods poet Cudworth Brown. He finds himself chasing all kinds of leads, including tracking down a mystery novel that Brown’s unreliable former lawyer has been writing, just as Beauchamp’s own wife, Margaret, has announced her candidacy for the Green Party.

Wisecracking private detective Sam Rockwell is running for his life, but that doesn't keep him from taking the case of a Return who's slipped past Heaven's radar and overstayed his time on Earth. Together with his fiance, Amelia, Sam brawls and dances his way through San Francisco to unravel a zany mystery where nothing is what it seems at first blush.

Noir contains three classic thrillers by Richard Matheson, the grand master of suspense. Originally published in the 1950s, at the very beginning of Matheson’s distinguished career, these page-turning classics are finally on audio for your listening pleasure. Now listeners everywhere can savor three unforgettable tales of crime, corruption, and cold-blooded murder.

San Francisco 1947: Es kommt nicht jeden Tag vor, dass eine rätselhafte, anmutige Blondine namens Stilton (ja, wie der Käse) in den verlotterten Laden kommt, in dem Sammy "Two Toes" Tiffin Gin ausschenkt. Es ist Liebe auf den ersten Blick. Aber bevor Sammy den ersten Schritt machen kann, betritt ein Air Force General mit einem eiligen Auftrag für ihn den Saloon. Doch Sammy hat eigentlich besseres zu tun: Er arbeitet an einer eigenen Geschäftsidee. Als aber an der Pazifikküste ein unbekanntes Flugobjekt gesichtet wird und Stilton plötzlich spurlos verschwindet, muss er sich seinen dunkelsten Geheimnissen stellen, um seinen Käse zu retten.

Scarlet Accordions of Doom Step into the gritty world of Max Noir, a hard-boiled detective with a penchant for trouble and a cynical heart. When the enigmatic Lana Legs, her scarlet stilettos echoing through his smoke-filled office, presents a birth certificate with no parental names, Max is drawn into a labyrinth of secrets and danger. Lana's quest for her true identity plunges Max into a case that unravels hidden pasts and dangerous liaisons, from mob lawyer Daniel "DNA" Arundel's sinister warnings to the tragic love story of Boca Loca and Horatio Norris. Max navigates a city where ...

Mary Shields is a moody, acerbic probation officer dealing with some of Glasgow’s worst cases, and her job is on the line. Liam Macdowall was imprisoned for murdering his wife, and he’s published a series of letters to the dead woman, in a book that makes him an unlikely hero - and a poster boy for Men’s Rights activists. Liam is released on licence into Mary’s care, but things are far from simple. Mary develops a poisonous obsession with Liam and his world, and when her son and Liam’s daughter form a relationship, Mary will stop at nothing to impose her own brand of justice.

Henry, a New Yorker left destitute by circumstance and obsession, is plucked from vagrancy by a shadowy outfit whose primary business is arranging for staged murders of anxiety-ridden clients unhinged by the “events downtown” and seeking to experience - and live through - their own carefully executed assassinations. When Henry joins this nefarious crew, which includes a beautiful blonde tattooist named Tulip, contortionist twins, and a woman referred to only as “the knockout”, he becomes inextricably linked to its ringleader, the mysterious herring connoisseur Mr. Kindt.

Matthew Cooke is a successful Los Angeles attorney. Until his A-list actor client blackmails him into exile. Now he’s back in his hometown. Ventura. Ninety miles up the coast but a lifetime away from the Hollywood bubble. He’s searching for a lifeline when an old high school acquaintance throws him one. Kevin Leary is a pot store owner, awash in cash and no way to spend it. He convinces Matthew to help him launder his money into the banking system. Along the way Matthew must contend with the appearance of his high school dream girl, Lola, and her father, the head of the Los Angeles mob....

Existential noir meets absurd comedy when a young man reluctantly enlists as source material for an art project. Stanley had known it was a mistake to accept his uncle Lech's offer to apartment-sit in Prague - he'd known it was one of Lech's proposals, a thinly veiled setup for some invasive, potentially dangerous performance art project. But whatever Lech had planned for Stanley, it would get him to Prague and maybe offer a chance to make things right with T after his failed attempt to propose.

Hero of a best-selling mystery series ... and his author wants him dead. Frank Miller, hero of the best-selling mystery novels written by The Man Upstairs, works the weird streets of Chapeltown as a private detective. During the legendary case of the Black Widow everything changed, Frank becoming aware of his fictional existence. Proclaimed at the time as a work of genius, Frank believes it was the first sign The Man Upstairs was sick. This latest case, involving the death of a care worker, and coinciding with the appointment of Chapeltown’s first elected mayor, has Frank baffled. The Man...

It’s the hottest heat wave of the summer and Gus’s air conditioner has decided to give up the ghost. It’s not the heat keeping Gus awake at night, though, but a nighttime visit from Father Xavier. He couldn’t sleep either due to the heat and decided it would be best that they didn’t sleep together. While the father was bothering Gus by telling him all about his recent visit to Italy, a welcome phone call came. Someone is going to be murdered at Deimos Technology. It doesn’t matter that the someone that is about to die is only an AI computer infected with a fatal computer virus. ...

Summer 1989: Gunther Fahnstiel, once a tough cop who wasn't averse to taking a little side money from a certain madam, has just escaped the dementia ward of his Wichita nursing home. He's not exactly sure where he wants to go, but wherever it is, it has to do with the bag full of cash belonging to the man he accidentally backed over with his RV in 1979. During his search, Gunther begins to relive the violent fallout of that madam's sex lottery 40 years ago. As Gunther's memories unravel, his past and present will collide in a devastating reckoning.

Private Detective Kaiser Wrench is a dangerous tiger to have as a friend, but he will avenge your death. Follow Kaiser as he prowls the streets of New York in the first five volumes of this series: I, the Tribunal; My Claws Are Quick; Retribution Is Mine!; A Solitary Evening; and The Great Slay.

A darkly comic noir about a chicken living in a world of anthropomorphic eggs who's wanted for a murder he didn't commit. Life is tough for an embry. Considered a vestigial organ at best and a parasite at worst, chicken embryos are usually aborted by the egg folk early in life. Once in a while, one survives and slips through, hatching into an embry, an ostracized, lower caste anthropomorphic chicken. They have their own ghettos, and are barely tolerated by polite society.