Kids Humor

A town is overrun by road weenies - a.k.a. joggers - who never smile. A girl thinks she's too old for Halloween...until she finds a special pair of gloves. A boy takes a shortcut to an unexpected place. A mummy takes his revenge, one little piece at a time.... These 35 tales ranging from the silly and offbeat to flat-out horrifying are just right for listening alone in the dark.

Mac must crack a secret code that has been recovered from a double agent. A series of clues leads Mac to France and then to Japan, where he comes face-to-face with his arch-nemesis, the KGB man...and the world headquarters of Nintendo! Is the KGB Man secretly behind all of this? And are Mac's video-game skills good enough to face down his enemy at the Video Game World Championships?

Every parent has stories about their kids’ antics. The kind of stories that result in fall-on-the-floor laughter. The vignettes in this book will appeal to anyone who has had, or is planning to have, children. It’s a compilation of the best of the authors’ child-rearing experiences from topics like toilet training and selective deafness to traveling with our cherubs. But Honey, He Has Purple Hair is written in Erma Bombeck’s tongue-in-cheek style with sometimes differing perspectives from the authors. Sure, raising kids is a challenge. But what’s to stop you from doing it with ...

If Howard Morton and Freddie the Frog Killer were trying to hold you down so that Mary Lou Hutton could kiss you, you might run as fast as Jeremy Thatcher did the day he stumbled into Mr. Elives' Magic Shop. And if you stumbled into that strange shop, you, too, might be asked to make a choice. What would you buy? The Chinese rings? The Skull of Truth? Or the dragon's egg?

Twelve year old Jake's middle school is about to be shut down—unless Jake and his friends can figure out how to save it. When Jake spies a bowl of jellybeans at the hotel where his mom works, he eats them. But those weren't just jellybeans. One of the scientists at his mom's conference is developing the world's first ingestible information pills. And that's what Jake ate.

When the Crown Jewels go missing from inside a locked room, Mac's spy skills are put to the test. How did the thief break in? Where did the jewels go? And will Mac be able to solve this locked-room mystery before the thief escapes? This mystery isn't just a whodunit...it's a howdunit! The action in this adventure is nonstop as Mac travels to an ancient Irish castle to solve the mystery. There, he encounters everything from killer king cobras to bizarre ice sculptures...and even a revenge plot dating back hundreds of years! Will you be able to solve the mystery before Mac does?

The Bailey School kids wonder if the new dentist in town, Dr. Herb, who has huge, bulging muscles and wears a shirt that reads, "Champion of the World," is really the Greek god, Hercules.

Picking up after Quint and Dirk's Hero Quest, the Last Kids are happily reunited—but quickly faced with a monstrous new mission. Inside an other-dimensional fortress, the evil Thrull, alongside a vile new villain, is carrying out a sinister plan. Jack, Quint, June and Dirk must make their own plans to infiltrate the stronghold before Thrull gets any closer to completing the mysterious Tower, a structure that could ultimately spell doom for this dimension.

The fifth book of the New York Times best-selling series! Surviving their first winter after the Monster Apocalypse was no easy feat, yet Jack and his buddies waste no time springing to action against some of the nastiest, most evil monsters around. When Jack discovers his Louisville Slicer has new, otherworldly powers, he's thrown into epic training to find out what kind of destruction the blade can wield.

Rafe Khatchadorian has enough problems at home without throwing his first year of middle school into the mix. Luckily, he's got an ace plan for the best year ever, if only he can pull it off: With his best friend Leonardo the Silent awarding him points, Rafe tries to break every rule in his school's oppressive Code of Conduct. Chewing gum in class - 5,000 points! Running in the hallway = 10,000 points! Pulling the fire alarm - 50,000 points! But when Rafe's game starts to catch up with him, he'll have to decide if winning is all that matters.

In this infectious rhyming book, Baby Llama turns bedtime into an all-out llama drama! Tucked into bed by his mama, Baby Llama immediately starts worrying when she goes downstairs, and his soft whimpers turn to hollers when she doesn't come right back. But just in time, Mama returns to set things right. Children will relate to Baby Llama's need for comfort, as much as parents will appreciate Mama Llama's reassuring message.

Sticking their noses where they are most definitely not wanted. Despairing of their humans, these pets take it upon themselves to solve the cases they see as only cats and dogs can. Whether they sniff out the clues or fool the criminals into thinking they are harmless pets to be ignored, Rex, Amber, Buster, and more enjoy escapades a plenty in this fun collection of short stories. Grab your copy and be ready for the fur to fly! Includes: Police Dog - Day One Amber's Bust The Little Lost Dachshund Hell Cat Hell Hounds The Clown, the Witch, and the Cat The Case of the Missing Pasty

There are 1.371 million animal species on Earth, each with their own quirky characteristics. Keep listening to learn some bonkers and hysterical facts about a few of them! People won't protect things they don't love. People won't love things they don't know. Here's your kid's chance to get to know some awesome, amazing, and amusing animals! The world around us is fascinating, as is the wildlife in it. My goal is to inspire a love and respect for this planet that'll make the next generation socially and environmentally conscious and motivate them to protect the earth.

WINNER OF THE FLORIDA AUTHORS AND PUBLISHERS ASSOCIATION PRESIDENT'S BOOK AWARD Kitty is proud of her adventurous life, having lived and traveled for several years on a sailboat. She's also tired of cramped quarters, seasickness, and angry seagulls. She wishes she could get off the boat and stretch her legs. Her wish comes true when Sue gives her a land-based home in Key West, in a book-filled apartment surrounded by tropical shrubbery and palm trees. But as soon as she steps outside the front door, Kitty finds herself embroiled in the mysterious dealings of the cats and chickens who live ...

With his zombie-controlling powers growing stronger, Jack Sullivan and his buddies are road-tripping toward the mysterious Tower, where they must once and for all stop Rezzoch the Ancient, Destructor of Worlds, from descending upon our dimension. But their journey is sidetracked when they are swept up by the Mallusk, an enormous centipede monster carrying the world's largest shopping mall on its back.

Valdez Jones VIII calls himself Wrecker because his great-great-great-great-great-grandfather salvaged shipwrecks for a living. So is it destiny, irony, or just bad luck when Wrecker comes across a speedboat that has run hard aground on a sand flat? The men in the boat don't want Wrecker to call for help—in fact, they'll pay him to forget he ever saw them. Wrecker would be happy to forget, but he keeps seeing these men all over Key West—at the marina, even in the cemetery. And now they want more than his silence—they want a lookout.

Get the Poop: The Diary of a Dung Beetle Dookie is a friendly but hungry young dung beetle whose life revolves around poop. He eats poop, drinks poop, and even bathes in poop. At the end of the day, Dookie loves nothing more than to wash his hair with seagull poo in a nice warm bubble dung bath. Dookie and his best friend Turdy aren't fussy when it comes to eating poop. They'll devour unhealthy fast-poop from McDumps or fresh seapoo from Poopie Joe's Seapoo Shack. These poop-eating beetles will get poop however it's served! Dookie's mom needs an elephant pooball to lay her eggs, so she asks...

Fun and Silly Jokes for Kids and Family! is a fun joke audiobook that contains 500 jokes that will tickle your funny bone! It’s perfect for families, parties, or even youth-group events!

Whatever you do, don't ask Greg about his summer vacation because he definitely doesn't want to talk about it.... It's a brand new year and a brand new journal and Greg is keen to put the humiliating (and secret!) events of last summer firmly behind him. But someone knows everything - someone whose job it is to most definitely not keep anything embarrassing of Greg's private - his big brother, Rodrick. How can Greg make it through this new school year with his not-quite-cool reputation intact?

Who cut off Medusa's head? Who was raised by a she-bear? Who tamed Pegasus? And whatever happened to that Golden Fleece? It takes a demigod to know the answers, and Percy Jackson can fill you in on all the daring deeds of Perseus, Atalanta, Bellerophon, and the rest of the major Greek heroes.