Kids Humor

Fact: Robots are awesome. They have lasers for eyes, rockets for feet, and supercomputers for brains! Plus, robots never have to eat steamed beans or take baths, or go to bed. If only there were some sort of magical “Robo-Sauce” that turned squishy little humans into giant awesome robots.... Well, now there is.

Do you want to give the best gift ever? If so, then give the gift of laughter. This book is full of clean jokes the little ones will absolutely love. Let them listen to this kid friendly book and watch their confidence soar like an eagle as they get the whole family laughing with well over 400 great jokes! Your child will have tons of hilarious jokes about animals, math, space, music, and so much more!

Whatever you do, don't ask Greg Heffley how he spent his summer holidays, because he definitely doesn't want to talk about it. As Greg enters the new school year, he's eager to put the past three months behind him...and one event in particular. Unfortunately for Greg, his older brother, Rodrick, knows all about the incident. And secrets have a way of getting out...especially when a diary is involved.

Amelia Bedelia's friend Rose is having a slumber party. It's Amelia Bedelia's first sleepover, and she's confused. Isn't sleeping boring? Luckily, all the girls in Amelia Bedelia's class are there, and the party is the exact opposite of boring. There are pizzas to eat, games to play, and fingernail polish in all the colors of the rainbow to admire. And when it is time to go to sleep, well, something unexpected happens then, too.

A giant turkey is on the loose! Nate, the great detective, and his dog, Sludge, hear the news on the radio. But Nate doesn't want to take a case that everyone in town is on. Not even when Claude claims that he saw the turkey, then lost him in the woods. He holds up a turkey feather to prove it. Now Sludge wants the case. Claude wants Sludge, and off they go. Miles away...Nate's cousin Olivia Sharp - herself a detective - hears about the missing turkey on TV. Before he can say gobble, gobble, Olivia appears on Nate's doorstep.

"Doctor De Soto, the dentist, did very good work." With the aid of his able assistant, Mrs. De Soto, he copes with the toothaches of animals large and small. His expertise is so great that his fortunate patients never feel any pain. Since he's a mouse, Doctor De Soto refuses to treat "dangerous" animals--that is, animals who have a taste for mice. But one day a fox shows up and begs for relief from the tooth that's killing him. How can the kindhearted De Sotos turn him away? But how can they make sure that the fox doesn't give in to his baser instincts once his tooth is fixed?

There are rules about owning a dragon. Don’t tell your parents. Don’t feed it cereal. And definitely don’t take it to Show-and-Tell. When a sarcastic, snack-loving kid finds a fire-breathing best friend named Flamey in his backyard, his life gets toasted—in the best possible way. But when Flamey mysteriously vanishes, what follows is a laugh-out-loud, marshmallow-melting mystery across secret tunnels, donut guilds, sewer traps, and a town that just doesn’t believe in dragons. Yet. Packed with heart, humor, friendship, and more flaming burps than anyone requested, Hey, Who Stole My...

Get ready for a wild and wacky adventure in "The Brown Note: The Epic Poop-tastic Quest!" Meet Tommy, a young inventor with big dreams of winning "The Young Inventor of the Year Competition." But there's just one problem – all his inventions are total duds! Tommy's quest for a winning idea takes a hilarious twist when he stumbles upon something unexpected. On his way home from school one day, Tommy discovers an old keyboard hidden in a pile of junk. But this isn't your ordinary keyboard – it's contains the legendary Brown Note! And this note has some seriously stinky surprises in store....

Something's up with Brother Bear. He's talking tough, he's walking tough, and he has a new hobby: shooting hoops with Too-Tall and his trouble-making team. And basketball isn't the only new pastime Brother takes up when he falls in the wrong crowd. Will Brother realize who his true friends are before it's too late?

Kids of all ages love silly jokes and puns. This massive collection of original and classic knock-knock jokes makes a perfect gift for all children!

From Iggy's point of view, his plan was genius, pure genius. From Iggy's point of view, he's saved (a) his candy, (b) his family, and (c) the toaster. From Iggy's point of view, he should get a trophy. And respect. And more candy. So what if Rudy Heckie disagrees? Rudy Heckie has been wrong before and he'll be wrong again. Rudy has a scar now, and scars are cool! He should be happy. So should Mr. Heckie. So should Iggy's mom and dad. Everyone should be happy. Specifically, everyone should be happy with Iggy.

Which of the following short stories would you read first? A.) A stubborn donkey challenges a Tennessee race horse. B.) A chess match ends in bloodshed. C.) Two sisters beg a funeral director to play their daddy's favorite Johnny Cash song. D.) A shooter takes aim from a church baptistry. E.) Two astronauts survive a horrific spinout only to return to earth and find everybody else walking around in super slow motion. Why not read them all? They're all in this far-flung collection of short stories and more. Scroll up and get them now with just one click.

Even as Julie worries about how her children are coping with the loss of their father and the recent move to their new ghost-town home in Mae’s Second Chance, her youngest son is quietly searching through one of the centuries-old buildings for a treasure he believes that his father means for him to find. But what he eventually discovers is not at all what he expects.Julie Engstrom has brought her family to the deserted ghost town of Mae’s Second Chance. She knew that her family needed something different as they struggled to deal with the loss that has changed their lives forever. Her ...

Kids, a Primer is a collection of a grandfather's musings on the way his (now grown) children are raising their children and being glad about being a grandparent rather than a new parent with young children (again). While Ungar is convinced that grandparents could do a better job raising children if they had the energy, he is grateful that he, in fact, no longer has the energy.

Greg Heffley will never change his wimpy ways...somebody just better tell Greg's dad that. Frank Heffley actually thinks he can get his son to toughen up and he enlists Greg in organised sports and other 'manly' endeavours. Thus far, Greg manages to sidestep his father's efforts, then comes the threat of military school, and Greg realises he has to shape up or ship out!

Although his work is technically illegal, Hubie Schuze has no qualms with digging up ancient Native American artifacts. The government calls him a thief, but Hubie thinks of himself as a treasure hunter - and his latest quest could be his last. After lowering himself into a cave in search of Anasazi pottery, Hubie uncovers a long-dead corpse, buried where the Anasazi would never have left a body. As he puzzles over this discovery, he hears a chilling sound: his truck, left behind on the cliff face, being driven away.

Grownups make no sense at all. They’re nuts about babies, but they tell their 9-year-olds to be more mature. They complain constantly about how old they are, and then they tell their kids to grow up. So when Iggy’s mom and dad say he can’t have a puppy because he’s not mature and responsible, Iggy develops an excellent plan to prove them wrong. Like any great plan, it involves secrecy, strategy, and a chinchilla. There’s also some screaming, but that’s not Iggy’s fault.

Omar is going on his biggest adventure yet - a trip to Pakistan! But his excitement about the trip is interrupted by some shocking news: his amazing teacher is not coming back to school, and no one will say why. When Omar and his friends start investigating, the hints they overhear and clues they find lead them to an alarming conclusion - it must be aliens!

THE BEST NEST ******************** At night when Mom said to take a bath, And wash his hair with shampoo. He’d only wet his hair with water, And his mother never knew.

Greg Heffley is in big trouble. School property has been damaged, and Greg is the prime suspect. But the crazy thing is, he's innocent. Or at least sort of. The authorities are closing in, but when a surprise blizzard hits, the Heffley family is trapped indoors. Greg knows that when the snow melts he's going to have to face the music, but could any punishment be worse than being stuck inside with your family for the holidays?