Space Humor

Joining the Space Troopers was my ticket off of the poor planet I grew up on. I believed the recruiter hype about being setup for life financially after my term of enlistment. Yeah, I was an ignorant soul. I didn't know about the tinkering the Space Trooper doctors would do with my brain and body. Nor did I know about the different alien species the United Planets was fighting on multiple fronts across the galaxy. Ignorance was bliss. Sometimes I miss it. My name is JT Jones. I've forgotten about being setup for life after my enlistment. I'm just trying to stay alive.

Marcus Aimond, untrained tag-along aboard humanity's first intergalactic exploratory commerce vessel, has a singular mission: sell off-brand misprinted merchandise. When the rookie and his crew encounter the Nerelkor, a frog-like civilization, he is thrust head-first into an alien civil war. The opposing factions, Rejault and Dinasc, are stuck in an ill-fated feud driven by deep-rooted ineptitude.

Archie Morningstar learns a big family secret and helps save the universe. All before breakfast! up at midnight. But today is Take Your Kid to Work Day, and Archie is finally allowed to ride along in his dad's taxi cab. He has been waiting eight years, eight months, and eight days for this moment to arrive. But he's about to discover his dad is no ordinary cab driver.... In fact, he drives an intergalactic space taxi!

The Wanderers have just moved on from Union Station, and the ambassador is ready to take her first vacation in 15 years. Unfortunately, the rules on paid vacation for EarthCent employees have changed for the worse, retroactively. Libby suggests spending some time exploring the station as an alternative, and Kelly cautiously goes along with it. Back at the embassy, while the cat's away, the mice will play.

In Soul to Soul, Jon, Simon and Lyn continue to trip and stumble across the universe in search of the ultimate margarita and a possible date for their friend Gilbert. As usual, they become tangled up with the universal forces of confusion, female androids are added into the mix, abstract consciousness is discovered in soup bowl, late night cable movies are discussed, insane theories win out and, as always, an ample amount of alcohol is consumed along the way. All this for your reading entertainment. This novel supports Amazon’s ‘look inside’ feature so if you like witty dialogue and ...

There are shootings in space, fighting in the streets, and Nadine is being friendly. It's the middle of a revolution but Jose is buying welding equipment, Dashi's diverted him to look for a lost ship, and Nadine has volunteered to help. Strange, but Dashi always knows what he's doing. But with alliances failing and allies fighting each other, what is really going on? Whose side is he on? The good guys? Or the bad?

Adam Cain had had worse days, but at the moment, he couldn't remember when. And when the native judge slammed an oblong stone on the podium before him, signaling an end to the fifteen-minute trial and sentencing, Adam felt a tingle run down his spine. It was going to take all his skill, experience—and luck—to get out of this one. And his latest challenge was just beginning. But Adam wasn't about to let the situation get the best of him. He had skills, skills which will be tested when he finds he's been placed in more of a zoo than a prison.

The universe should be fun, and you’re about to discover an audiobook that understands that, weaving humor and wit into every minute so that you not only understand what you’re listening to, but enjoy the whole process.

This wasn't like Adam Cain—AKA: The Human for Hire. He wasn't supposed to be compassionate and caring. But for some reason, he'd taken the former Third-Generation Human John Martinez under his wing and was now determined to show him what the real Human race was all about. As a 3G, Martinez had been raised by the Klin to believe a completely false narrative about his native race. But having never been to Earth—and after only a few tragic encounters with other Humans—what was Martinez to believe?

Frank Einstein (kid-genius, scientist, and inventor) and his best friend, Watson, along with Klink (a self-assembled artificial-intelligence entity) and Klank (a mostly self-assembled and artificial almost-intelligence entity), once again find themselves in competition with T. Edison, their classmate and arch-rival, this time studying the science and mysteries of the universe!

It’s been three years since Esa left her backwater planet to join the ranks of the Justified. Together, she and fellow agent Jane Kamali have been traveling across the known universe, searching for children who share Esa’s supernatural gifts. On a visit to a particularly remote planet, they learn that they’re not the only ones searching for gifted children. They find themselves on the tail of a mysterious being with impossible powers who will stop at nothing to get his hands on the very children that Esa and Jane are trying to save.

After his last two jobs left him broke and in debt, The Human for Hire is looking for a way to make some quick cash. And that's when three Human friends from his past show up, offering him a piece of the action in an upcoming bank robbery. At first, he says no. But then the details come out. It's behind enemy lines . . . and it's a Klin bank they'd be robbing. As Adam Cain says, "This could be the perfect crime." Get ready for Kelly's Heroes in Space, as Adam Cain and friends embark on a hair brain scheme to rob half-a-billion energy credits from a Klin bank.

Maurice "Moss" Foote is down to his last hundred credits, which he needs to get his old ship back and start over. Again. But then, Moss is so familiar with rock bottom he has his mail forwarded there. Hel was born a slave, or maybe she wasn't. It's confusing, just like the compulsion that keeps her building... something. When she sees an opportunity to escape aboard a ship, she takes it, not realizing the trouble she's in for.

That is Fanner Marston’s mantra—his reason for being—and while he knows a little about the first and a lot about the second, he may well be on the verge of learning everything there is to know about the third. Power. He may, in fact, be about to uncover the key to gaining absolute control over the entire universe. The only problem is, Fanner is certifiably insane.... His starship has crash-landed, and he’s the sole survivor, which doesn’t matter to him.

Jakes back. He's older, wiser, and better dressed. He's going to be the coolest spy ever, then he fails his pilot exam. Disgraced, Dashi sends him out hunting missing food shipments. It's boring, but Nadine's shadowing him. Is it to find out what he knows, or just to snoop on that slinky redhead free trader pilot he took to dinner?

When Darren’s charge-cart gets knocked off the Earth-to-Mars highway and lost in space forever, he thinks his day can’t get any worse. When Kelly sees Darren accidentally short-circuit a talking lamppost, and its camera captures her face as it expires, she thinks her day can’t get any worse. When Pamasonic Teffal, a sentient breadmaker, is sent on a top-secret mission into the depths of the Internet and betrayed by her boss, a power-crazed smartphone, she knows this is only the beginning of a day that isn’t going to get any better. Join Darren, Kelly, and Pam in an anarchic comic adventure.

Leo MacGavin is not the brightest specimen of humanity, but when he inadvertently rescues a flirty alien heiress, he’s promoted from second-rate lounge entertainer to captain of the galaxy’s most sophisticated cruise ship. Before he can flee in terror, a human-hating executive gives Leo an ultimatum: complete the vessel’s maiden voyage or mankind’s last colony will be turned into a sewage dump. To make matters worse, a militant cyborg is undermining his authority, a giant spider is terrifying the passengers, and a sentient plant keeps stealing all the beer.

When the universe throws him a curveball, Bevil Cyrex finds himself adrift in space on a ship determined to kill him. But then, in a stroke of luck, he stumbles across an ancient and abandoned space station called The Starlite. Once he is on board the station, Bevil soon finds himself befriending a nanite swarm that takes on the appearance and mannerisms of his grandmother.

On the other side of the galaxy, the Cayl Empire has decided to wind down operations and the Stryx are planning to pick up the pieces. Kelly is tapped to host an open house event on Union Station to tempt the aliens into joining up, but does anybody other than the Stryx actually want the merger to take place?

Evangelist Brock T. Hanson believes Colin Douglass to be the prophet he’s been waiting for his whole life, the man who will lead the faithful back to Earth and trigger the most momentous event since Creation itself. But there’s a problem. Actually, there are several. First, Colin Douglass himself doesn’t believe a word of it and is the kind of chap who’d rather stay at home with a nice cup of tea than cross the galaxy on some foolish, idealistic crusade.