Preview
  • Everything Has Teeth

  • By: Jeff Strand
  • Narrated by: Andy Barker
  • Length: 8 hrs and 16 mins
  • 4.3 out of 5 stars (28 ratings)

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Everything Has Teeth

By: Jeff Strand
Narrated by: Andy Barker
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Publisher's summary

Contains the Splatterpunk Award-winning story The Tipping Point.

A city where people are turning gleefully insane. Inescapable blood-sucking bugs. A serial killer who may have discovered proof of alien life. A kinky proposal to "even out" an instance of infidelity. A man whose fingernails are growing at an out of control rate. Twisted new spins on the legends of John Henry and Humpty Dumpty. The all-time worst bathtub in which to bathe a child. The inconvenience of finding a dead Bigfoot in your yard.

These are only a few of the stories in Jeff Strand's deranged new collection, which includes several macabre tales written just for these bloody audiobook.

Table of contents:

  • The Tipping Point
  • Nails
  • Stumps
  • John Henry, The Steel Drivin' Man
  • Fair Trade
  • Chiggers
  • Cry
  • The Fierce Stabbing and Subsequent Post-Death Vengeance of Scooter Brown
  • It's Bath Time!
  • Alien Face
  • Apocalypse of the Yard Gnome
  • Dead Bigfoot on the Lawn
  • Gross-Out: The Return
  • Deformed Son
  • The Origin of Slashy
  • Secret Message (Decoded)
  • The Sentient Cherry Cola That Tried to Destroy the World
  • The Eggman Falleth
  • The Story of My First Kiss
  • Dad (A True Story)
  • Bad Bratwurst
©2017 Jeff Strand (P)2019 Jeff Strand
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What listeners say about Everything Has Teeth

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Not a normal book

This was an absolutely wonderful book. If you like books that are a bunch of VERY dark some not so dark short stories. This isn't an Andrew Mayhem type long horrible story that just gets worse. just short ones. very good book

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Narration Is Not Good

I love almost everything Jeff Strand has written, but I found these stories to be hit and miss. As with Dead Clown Barbecue, this narrator is fine until he attempts a fake American accent, which is excruciating. Like fingernails on a chalkboard, fast forward through the story bad. When he breaks into "redneck", it's especially bad. It's hard to focus on the story when the narration is so distracting.

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    4 out of 5 stars

Some were good...

Some of these stories were pretty good. A few were amazing. And a couple of them were so creepy, I just couldn’t finish! “Chiggers” made me squirm!!!!!

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  • Overall
    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars
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    1 out of 5 stars

Nonsensical stories and godawful narration

Firstly, this audiobook sounds like it was recorded in a portable toilet. HORRIBLE quality. The stories themsleves seem like they were runner's-up in a 6th grade short story contest. The narration is irritatingly nasally, and get ready for the worst southern accent by a British guy you've ever heard.

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2 people found this helpful