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Hard Ware

By: Misha Bell, Dima Zales, Anna Zaires
Narrated by: Ava Erickson, Teddy Hamilton
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Publisher's summary

So, my Chihuahua fell in love with a bear. Excuse me, a giant, bear-like dog.

Now, the bear’s scorching hot owner is on my case, demanding an STD test...for my pet.

Another problem with this doggy love affair? The bear’s mysterious owner may be the key to funding my new venture and taking my toys company to the next level. And by “toys", I mean the fun kind, the kind every woman (and man) needs.

If only I could figure out what he’s hiding - or get my libido to behave. Because mixing business and pleasure is a bad idea, and Dragomir Lamian may not be who he seems.

Note: This is a standalone, raunchy, slow-burn romantic comedy featuring a confident, toy-obsessed heroine who knows every Russian superstition under the sun, her meet-cute with a hot, mysterious stranger, and two dogs engaged in a love affair of their own. If any of the above is not your cup of tea, run away now. Otherwise, buckle in for a laugh-out-loud, feel-good ride.

©2021 Misha Bell (P)2021 Misha Bell
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What listeners say about Hard Ware

Average customer ratings
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  • 4.5 out of 5 stars
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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

Really really good

This is my first book From Misha Bell and it’s awesome. I loved it the narration is awesome Ava is great. Thanks for the book

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

So funny

Bella Chortsky is a sex toy developer. A very successful one. She also likes to try her own product. So one day, she is walking her dog Bonaparte ("Boner", for short) in the park while the is trying out her improved Kegel balls. The last thing she expected was that her chihuahua would fall in instalust with a ginormous dog and manage to hump her! Add to all this that  the dog's owner is one hunk of a man and Bella sees herself in the middle of a massive orgasm (those damn balls work!!) induced by the sight of him.  In the midst of the mayhem, her "meditation ball" (she's calling them that and sticking to it!!) falls to the floor and Winnie immediately eats it! The outraged owner had already demanded that Boner be tested for STDs because he assaulted his precious dog and now this. Now that's a meet cute!

But, as in true romantic comedy fashion, Bella loses the cup where Dragomir Lamian wrote his phone number and she can't contact him re the test results. Or anything else.

Bella goes on about her life (even though she does try to find him in the park) and it's time to meet her new investor. She goes to the meeting to pitch her new VR suit (yes, this is going to be a very special VR suits, ladies and gentlemen!) and guess who the potential investor is! Dragomir, who demands immediately that they leave the meeting and go test Boner! 

Bella is completelty smitten by the mysterious Dragomir and she's been having all sorts of crazy thoughts: is he from the Russian mafia? Is he married? Why can't she find anything about him anywhere?

I loved these characters! Bella is a hoot! She's a ventriloquist and she uses that to give voice to Boner and he's got a French accent and everything. I loved all the Russian superstitions under the sun and found out that quite a few of them belong to my own culture. 

When we find out who Dragomir really is, it's more fun than you'd expect. He's perfect for the Elsa from Frozen super-fan! 

Super-fun read! It's book 2 in a series but it can definitely read as a standalone. 

Superb narration by Ava Erickson with an added epilogue by the wonderful Teddy Hamilton. 

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

LOL with definitely adult humor

I listened to Hard Code and was glad to notice there were 2 other related books.

Fun that some of the characters were brought in with a lot of humor from the other book.

Look forward to listening to the book with Alex

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Listener received this title free

This was such an entertaining read!

This was such an entertaining read! It was a silly and just had me laughing out loud a lot. I think it's pretty funny that the Belka sex toys were a big part of this book when they were also a big part of book 1.

The heroine, Bella is the creator of the company and I love that she took pride her company. There was no shame at all. Everyone's reactions to her gifting her products was another funny part to the book.

Despite being proud of her company, she had a really good reason to keep that knowledge from Dragomir. I had a feeling he wouldn't mind though. Their meet que was funny and adorable, as well as the very, mismatched dog romance.

I highly recommend the audiobook. The narrators were fantastic! A fun listen!

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

More please

Love the humor, sweet love story, and glamorous world that is created. Narrators were great.

Love that Bella is brainy, knows what she wants and goes for it. The H is the strong and considerate mate I think everyone looks for...

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

Dogs + toys = a RomCom that makes your day

Story/character: I laughed way more than I did in this book than in Hard Code. Right from chapter one. Although I loved, Bella and Dragomir’s love story, I enjoyed their dogs more. The voice and character Bella uses to personify her chihuahua is adorably funny. Dragomir’s big dog on the other hand is so silly and shy. I love how the two dogs are together and get into different shenanigans together.

Only downside is the single POV. Maybe it wouldn’t be as funny if it was Dragomir narrating since he’s more serious and doesn’t have that much awkward humor as Bella. But it would’ve been so nice to get his perspective and his personification of Winnie the dog, since he was willing to play along with Bella’s ventriloquism of her dog’s voice/persona.

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1 person found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

amazing. funny & hot

very well written, narrators did a great job. story line was great. a good book #2 hard code is by far my favorite. but both books are great . I do recommend and qell worth a credit with a HEA and no cliffhangers.

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  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
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    5 out of 5 stars

A LIGHT EASY LISTEN OF LAUGHTER, SIZZLES & SEX

What a fun and enjoyable slow-build as Fate tangles and toys with peeved pooch owners Dragomir and Bella before Destiny herself comes in after their truth bombs and builds bridges to save their HEAs. Dragomir is much more than a handsome, sexy, droll-worthy hunk of a Businessman.. and fun-loving beautiful Bella designs, uses, gifts and is the brains of her own successful adult sex toy business. And, when seeking funding throws in a curveball.. when her tiny chihuahua Boner gets Dragomir’s beast of dog pregnant.. and when mutual attraction sizzles, sparks and combusts between the two loving pet owners, it leads to a very adult ’toy’ story. They just click (.. no, not the toys.. minds gutters please), they both vie for having the worst parents ever, they share a similar language, they love love love their dogs.. and they are heading towards loving each other too.. but they both have secrets. So once they’re out of the can, will the spill lead to heartbreak or happily ever afters?

This is a quirky, light, fun, charmingly sweet and playfully sexy Rom Com with Bella sometimes mentally vocalizing both dogs accented humorous thoughts and feelings. The initially hostile and laughable relationship between Bella and Dragomir deliciously builds into romance and sexcapades.. and the secondary characters all enrich the plot wherever they are placed in the storyline. Ava’s narration was a five ⭐️ excellent performance.. BUT tut tut 👎 don’t go taunting Teddy’s name hinting it’s dual POV when his ONLY actual contribution (which was all too briefly welcomed by me 🥰) was actually nothing more than the Epilogue ☹️😔😢 .

Worth a credit? Yes, there’s flirts, laughter and fun times.. there’s anticipation and many many rewards.. there’s a sexy rich hero that’s hiding something big and a feisty entrepreneur who knows what she wants - and the lucky lady isn’t disappointed 😉😉.. and I happily listened as it lightened the load of ‘21.

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4 people found this helpful

  • Overall
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Performance
    5 out of 5 stars
  • Story
    5 out of 5 stars

loved it even more than the first one!

I enjoyed book one but there were times when I found Fanny to be a bit unrelatable. however that issue is not in this book at all I found Bella to be extremely relatable and so likable I was literally laughing my butt off while listening to this and cheering for them every step of the way.

The performance was very good I didn't have any problems listening to it and her voice never became annoying to me. overall it was extremely great to listen to and I will definitely be looking into other books she's read because I find her voice acting to be great!

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  • Overall
    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars
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    4 out of 5 stars

A bit silly ...

So first with the good things. This is well written and preformed and it was entertaining. I especially liked the Princess Bride references dropped in along the way. It was light hearted and not full of drama, desperation and angst. It was also about adults not teens or college aged kids so that was a plus. Now for the things I did not like. It was a bit over the top all around and I rolled my eyes a lot. But what really took this book away from five stars for me was the Sex Toys, Bella the nympho manic and the Dog Speak. The sex toys were overly present in thought, all over her house, dogs using them themselves and as chew toys, them being given for every gift and those are just the ones that really stuck out. Next is Bella's inner nympho her thoughts are sexual pretty much all the time even when highly inappropriate or out in left field as there is literally nothing sexy happening to trigger said thoughts. Lastly the dog speak could have been cute but again it was littered with Bella the nympho so cute turned into crude. For me at least the toys, nympho and dog speak were to excessive. I didn't exactly hate this book but I didn't love it either and it won't be going in to my read it again section of my personal library. However it was written well enough that I am going to explore this authors other works. Ava and Teddy already litter my library as they are consumate pros and very talented.

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