Mr. Absolutely Not!
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Narrated by:
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Meg Sylvan
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Tim Paige
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By:
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Alina Jacobs
About this listen
Armed with comfy pants, overpriced coffee, and a highly anxious emotional-support corgi, I prepare to face him.
Corporate boss. Villain.
Salinger Svensson.
I step into his office. His perfect mouth twists into a sneer.
There is no heart of gold beneath that suit, just a big black pit. He’s a shark in the frothy waters of high-stakes finance.
He might be the archetypal-asshole CEO, causing all in his path to quake in fear, but he’s never had to face down a basic bitch in her thirties.
I am exactly like the other girls—I adore Starbucks, greige home decor, and making snarky jokes with my bestie. I’ve even inherited a stalker from an ill-advised singles party.
Yeah, the stalker is… a problem, one I’m hoping will just go away if I ignore it.
I can’t ignore him, though.
He’s all broad shoulders and snide comments, picking apart everything about me as he circles me, going for the kill.
He would never fire me, though. There’s no fun in that. He wants me to quit, to have a mental breakdown.
Well, he can get in line behind my crazy gold-digging sister, my guilt-tripping mother, and the aforementioned stalker.
Salinger pins me with his gaze.
I brace myself, waiting for the verbal blow to come…
Instead, he says, “I need a date tonight, and unfortunately, it has to be you.”
This is a full-length, enemies-to-lovers romantic comedy, complete with smokin’ hot-but-morally gray heroes, a smidge of suspense, and of course the perfect happily ever after! Though this is intended to be a stand-alone book, it does take place after the recently completed Manhattan Svensson Brothers series.
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Lowen Ashleigh is a struggling writer on the brink of financial ruin when she accepts the job offer of a lifetime. Jeremy Crawford, husband of best-selling author Verity Crawford, has hired Lowen to complete the remaining books in a successful series his injured wife is unable to finish. Lowen arrives at the Crawford home, ready to sort through years of Verity's notes and outlines, hoping to find enough material to get her started. What Lowen doesn't expect to uncover in the chaotic office is an unfinished autobiography Verity never intended for anyone to read.
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intriguing but skip if triggered by child abuse
- By Amazon Customer on 05-16-19
By: Colleen Hoover
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Mr. and Mrs. Christmas
- By: Michelle Stimpson
- Narrated by: Marcella Cox, Ian Hackney
- Length: 7 hrs and 28 mins
- Original Recording
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There's no place like home for the holidays ... especially for Lesley Carver. Life in the big city just wasn't her jam and now she's back in Hickory Falls, working at the family diner and helping her mom after she took a tumble. Lesley longs to build a life here, working at the cafe, selling her handmade ornaments and ... er, apparently reviving her high school crush on her best friend’s older brother. Only one problem, her mom wants her to leave Hickory Falls far behind.
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Loved the book!
- By Amazon Customer on 11-15-24
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Merry Ever After
- Under the Mistletoe Collection
- By: Tessa Bailey
- Narrated by: Summer Morton, Connor Crais
- Length: 1 hr and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Evie Crowe is starting over in a strange town with her newborn, and men are the furthest thing from her mind. If only the quiet, hulking farmer, Luke Ward, would stop coming into the thrift shop and piquing her reluctant interest. Evie wants to stay single all the way—she can’t trust anything more than friends-with-holiday-benefits. But Luke is in it for the long haul. He’s fixed on making this a Christmas Evie will remember forever. If she gives him a chance.
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Cringy lines ruined it
- By Lenna Crosby on 12-01-24
By: Tessa Bailey
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Cruel Winter with You
- Under the Mistletoe Collection
- By: Ali Hazelwood
- Narrated by: Vivienne LaRue
- Length: 2 hrs
- Unabridged
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All newly minted pediatrician Jamie Malek wants is to borrow a roasting pan for Christmas dinner. Unfortunately, that requires her to interact with Marc—her best friend’s troublemaking brother, who’s now a tech billionaire. He’s the one who got away. She’s the one who broke his heart. Outside, a howling blizzard. Inside, a crackling fire. Suddenly, being snowbound with the man she never expected to see again might not be such a bad way to spend a winter’s night.
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Endless insecurities and translation fails
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 11-12-24
By: Ali Hazelwood
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Holiday Hideaway
- A Short Story
- By: Mary Kay Andrews
- Narrated by: Eva Kaminsky
- Length: 1 hr and 59 mins
- Unabridged
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Tilly Farriday isn’t feeling very jolly this season. Recently divorced and broke, she’s squatting in one of her rental agency’s properties until her new home is ready. The sprinkles on top of the burnt Christmas cookie that is her life? The new owner shows up early, forcing Tilly to hide in the attic to save her job…and what remains of her dignity.
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I ain’t afraid of no ghosts
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 10-31-24
By: Mary Kay Andrews
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The Plight Before Christmas
- By: Kate Stewart
- Narrated by: Joe Arden, Maxine Mitchell
- Length: 10 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
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Clark Griswold was onto something...at least with his annual holiday meltdown. And since the last three weeks of my life have been riddled with humbug—another breakup, a broken toe, an office promotion I deserved and didn’t get—I’m not at all in the mood to celebrate nor have the happ, happ, happiest Christmas EVER.
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Gaslighting and games
- By FMC on 12-22-22
By: Kate Stewart
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Merriment and Mayhem
- Under the Mistletoe Collection
- By: Alexandria Bellefleur
- Narrated by: Amelie Griffin
- Length: 1 hr and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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When Everleigh Dangerfield’s baking disaster necessitates a call to 911, firefighter Griffin Brantley douses the flames in the kitchen, but the ones he stokes in Everleigh are an entirely different story. Unfortunately, Everleigh’s only visiting and doesn’t do casual hookups, no matter how smoldering the temptation. But Everleigh’s holiday mishaps have just begun. And Griffin is seemingly always on call. If Everleigh is game for a change of plans, he can give her the merriest Christmas of her life.
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Shoulda been Merriment, Mayhem, and Mouth
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 11-12-24
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How to Lose a Guy Before Christmas
- By: A.J. Pine
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt, Jason Clarke
- Length: 5 hrs and 24 mins
- Original Recording
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After a snowstorm grounds her flight, Lucy makes a last-ditch effort to get home for Christmas using a rideshare app. She thinks she’ll be taking a road trip with a stranger...but the guy who shows up is someone she knows all too well. He’s the hookup she ghosted a few months ago, and now she’ll be stuck in a car with him for the most awkward road trip of her life.
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Nearly pitch perfect holiday romcom novella
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 11-17-23
By: A.J. Pine
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Resting Scrooge Face
- A Short Story
- By: Meghan Quinn
- Narrated by: Carly Robins, Aaron Shedlock
- Length: 1 hr and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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After a bad breakup, Nola wants nothing to do with Christmas, especially in her quaint hometown of Bright Harbor, Maine. Infuriatingly charming and cheery, Nola’s surroundings only worsen her sour mood. To make matters worse, Caleb, the boy who broke her heart years ago, is all grown up and still living in town. While doing her best to avoid him, Nola bumps into the local mailman, who gives her a mysterious letter. And when she finds that the writer is a fellow Scrooge, she can’t help but feel her spirit lifting.
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No-sex, “enemies to lovers,” Christmas short story
- By Kate McMurry on 12-24-22
By: Meghan Quinn
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Meet the Copper Valley Fireballs, baseball's lovable losers whose hot heroes are determined to turn this team around and resisting finding love along the way! This box set includes four full-length romantic comedies and a bonus novella.
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Seraphina Moretti is half in love with her best friend's brother. An arranged marriage is in her future, and the groom is not the object of her affection. But then the devil of Wall Street whispers in her ear. Telling her to follow her heart, that the unrequited love she's feeling is reciprocated. She just needs to use a ploy as old as time—jealousy.
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Bosshole Bundle review
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The Boss + the Maid = Chemistry
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When an older guy with a dirty grin and an expensive suit flirts with me from the next barstool, I don’t realize I’m about to have a one-night stand with the man I desperately want to work for. After a night that leaves my world (and body) shaken, I start my summer job housekeeping in a five-star hotel even though I’m determined to kickstart my career in tech. As I dust and polish the Park Suite, in walks Mr. Dirty Grin—now with an icy glare.
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CHEMISTRY + EASY PLOT + ROBERT HATCHET = 5 ⭐️
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What listeners say about Mr. Absolutely Not!
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- AEW
- 08-13-24
Entertaining, Steamy Listen
Mr. Absolutely Not! was such a FUN listen. Mandy and Salinger are complete opposites, but somehow they work together. Their adversarial relationship is full of highs and lows, but it’s so entertaining that I couldn’t stop listening.
Mandy is so self-reliant and independent with such a huge heart for her family. She lets Salinger treat her badly, but underneath her snarkiness and gentle heart is a spine of steel. Salinger is so grumpy and entitled and full of hurtful opinions that it’s hard to imagine that anyone could love him, but I couldn’t help but like him. Mandy softens him and he’s absolutely obsessed once he notices her as something other than his assistant. Once he falls, he falls hard and his bossiness and possessiveness is like no other. Put him together with Mandy’s crazy family and it’s absolute chaos.
Meg Sylvan and Tim Paige narrate the audio and they were a delight. I was hooked from the first chapter and lost myself in the story. Full of snappy, flirty banter, hilarious hijinks, wacky family moments, sizzling chemistry and a turbulent relationship that is electric, I found Mr. Absolutely Not! to be wildly entertaining and I loved every minute.
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- ashley h
- 08-15-24
good story but may trigger people
I liked this story, and I don't want to leave spoilers but I do want to warn people that it not only includes a Stalker and physical attack, but also a male love interest that, at times, acts worse than the Stalker.
other than that, I definitely enjoyed a female lead in her 30's with a job and a good head on her shoulders. also, her parents were written so realistically I couldn't stop picturing my own mother!
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- enjoys a great read
- 08-12-24
A very fun read
Oh my goodness, those Svenssons !! Alina is the queen of hilarious and naughty stories. The characters are fabulous.
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- emily_minnesota
- 08-12-24
Billionaire/Assistant, romcom, crazy family, spice
Billionaire/Assistant, he protects her, crazy family, romcom, and lots of spice.... lots of spice!!!
But what I love about Alina's writing is that by the time we get to the good spice we are so involved in the characters and connected to them, it just makes it that much better. We don't get too much spice before we are even half way through the book. And the wait was worth it!
Salinger finally gets a book!!! He has been so mysterious I am so happy we are finally getting to know him and the west coast a bit more. They have been so secretive. I can't wait to see more of those boys.
This book is the first in the West Coast Svensson brothers series and can be read as a complete stand-alone. Of course you will know more if you have read the other brothers books. But you will not feel left out if this is the first brother you have read. You will get some fun little Easter eggs though if you have read some of the other series as well. But they are just minor, so if you haven't read the books you won't miss anything. But if you have the Easter eggs will give you quite a giggle.
I listened to the audiobook of this, and loved it! I think that hearing the voices gives you so much more as a reader. You really can feel the emotions. These narrators were top-notch.
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- V. Gonzalez
- 09-30-24
Really enjoyed this
I saw the other reviews and was hesitant but I’m really glad I got this audiobook. It’s very rare that you get the kind of irreverent humor, true and then we used to lovers that is so often touted by other books, but isn’t really the case. This is a true enemies to lovers book if you don’t like that, look elsewhere. I really enjoy hateful enemies to lovers books. If you are a dark romance, reader and need something light to read in between your dark romances, but still want a touch of darkness. This is definitely the way to go. Is this a lit masterpiece? No but is it fun? Yes. Read this if you want to for the pure enjoyment of it. It’s not meant to be taken seriously.
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- MJJ8115
- 08-08-24
Love the Svenssons!
Narrators were very enjoyable to listen to. Engaging story with the right amount of spice 🌶️. Excited for the west coast Svensson brothers. I totally recommend all of Alina Jacob's books on the Svenssons.
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- Lily
- 08-14-24
Unnecessarily dramatic
The story was overly dramatic. So unnecessary. The angst the main female character had was over the top & the ridiculous way in which she handled many situations had me bumping up the speed on the audiobook just to get thru the unnecessary drama quickly. The storyline could have been good. I don’t understand why the female lead was made out to be so stupid at times; it was very unappealing.
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- Jaime Paguaga
- 08-14-24
Characters were way out there
This story started off ok but just went off the deep end. I couldn't even finish it. I wasted a credit on this. Too bad. I liked the authors previous books but this one just didn't do it for me.
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- ESP
- 08-14-24
Wonderful
This book was different from the other ones. I like how she brought out a different part of the brothers. I love how the family comes together to help each other wven when things arent perfect between them. I love this and cant wait for more to come out.
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- Kara Conaway
- 08-12-24
Absolutely yes!!!
This was such a good story. It captured my attention from the very beginning and didn't let go. The twists were expected but fun.
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