Plain Bad Heroines
A Novel
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Narrated by:
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Xe Sands
About this listen
“Full of Victorian sapphic romance, metafictional horror, biting misandrist humor, Hollywood intrigue, and multiple timeliness - all replete with evocative illustrations that are icing on a deviously delicious cake.” (O, The Oprah Magazine)
“Brimming from start to finish with sly humor and gothic mischief. Brilliant.” (Sarah Waters)
Named a Most Anticipated Book by:
- O, The Oprah Magazine
- Buzzfeed
- Harper's Bazaar
- Vulture
- Parade
- Popsugar
- Bustle
- Goodreads
- Autostraddle
- Literary Hub
- And more!
The award-winning author of The Miseducation of Cameron Post makes her adult debut with this highly imaginative and original horror-comedy centered around a cursed New England boarding school for girls - a wickedly whimsical celebration of the art of storytelling, sapphic love, and the rebellious female spirit.
Our story begins in 1902, at the Brookhants School for Girls. Flo and Clara, two impressionable students, are obsessed with each other and with a daring young writer named Mary MacLane, the author of a scandalous best-selling memoir. To show their devotion to Mary, the girls establish their own private club and call it the Plain Bad Heroine Society. They meet in secret in a nearby apple orchard, the setting of their wildest happiness and, ultimately, of their macabre deaths.
This is where their bodies are later discovered with a copy of Mary’s book splayed beside them, the victims of a swarm of stinging, angry yellow jackets. Less than five years later, the Brookhants School for Girls closes its doors forever - but not before three more people mysteriously die on the property, each in a most troubling way.
More than a century later, the now-abandoned and crumbling Brookhants is back in the news when wunderkind writer Merritt Emmons publishes a breakout book celebrating the queer, feminist history surrounding the “haunted and cursed” Gilded Age institution. Her best-selling book inspires a controversial horror film adaptation starring celebrity actor and lesbian it girl Harper Harper playing the ill-fated heroine Flo, opposite B-list actress and former child star Audrey Wells as Clara. But as Brookhants opens its gates once again, and our three modern heroines arrive on set to begin filming, past and present become grimly entangled - or perhaps just grimly exploited - and soon it’s impossible to tell where the curse leaves off and Hollywood begins.
A story within a story within a story, Plain Bad Heroines is a devilishly haunting, modern masterwork of metafiction that manages to combine the ghostly sensibility of Sarah Waters with the dark imagination of Marisha Pessl and the sharp humor and incisive social commentary of Curtis Sittenfeld into one laugh-out-loud funny, spellbinding, and wonderfully luxuriant listen.
Supplemental enhancement PDF accompanies the audiobook.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2020 Emily M. Danforth (P)2020 HarperCollins PublishersListeners also enjoyed...
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One of my favorite books
- By Joey on 01-13-08
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Face It
- By: Georgette Kaplan
- Narrated by: Anastasia Watley
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In college, Elizabeth Smile shared a magical tryst with her roommate, Michelle Harlow. She had no idea the night would leave Elizabeth pining after her for the next ten years. Now Michelle is back with a strange offer: Will she pretend to be Michelle's lesbian lover to beat Michelle's cheating husband?
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Give it a chance—brilliant!
- By Meredith on 01-22-23
By: Georgette Kaplan
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Two Truths and a Lie
- A Novel
- By: Meg Mitchell Moore
- Narrated by: Courtney Patterson
- Length: 10 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Truth: Sherri Griffin and her daughter, Katie, recently moved to the idyllic beach town of Newburyport, Massachusetts. They’ve been welcomed by Rebecca Coleman, unofficial former leader of the Newburyport Mom Squad, and her teenage daughter Alexa, Katie’s new babysitter. Truth: Alexa has time on her hands after a falling-out with her friends involving her popular YouTube channel.
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Really more of a YA novel...
- By Faith W. on 09-04-20
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Call Down the Hawk (The Dreamer Trilogy, Book 1)
- By: Maggie Stiefvater
- Narrated by: Will Patton
- Length: 13 hrs and 45 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ronan Lynch is a dreamer. He can pull both curiosities and catastrophes out of his dreams and into his compromised reality. Jordan Hennessy is a thief. The closer she comes to the dream object she is after, the more inextricably she becomes tied to it. Carmen Farooq-Lane is a hunter. Her brother was a dreamer...and a killer. She has seen what dreaming can do to a person. And she has seen the damage that dreamers can do. But that is nothing compared to the destruction that is about to be unleashed....
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Unlistenable
- By Nathan Parker on 11-24-19
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Point B
- A Teleportation Love Story
- By: Drew Magary
- Narrated by: Rebecca Soler
- Length: 15 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When the corporate monolith PortSys brought porting to the masses, CEO Emilia Kirsch and her son, Jason, accomplished what every other start-up company had failed to deliver. They really did change the world. They reversed climate change. They created a multitrillion-dollar industry out of thin air, curing economic woes across the globe. They made it so that anyone could be anywhere simply by touching a screen...including the man who murdered Sarah Huff. Now, Sarah’s 17-year-old sister, Anna, is determined to hunt the bastard down. But there are a few problems.
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Sherry Potter’s only got one spell: portkey
- By aaron gilbert on 11-02-20
By: Drew Magary
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The Miseducation of Cameron Post
- By: Emily M. Danforth
- Narrated by: Beth Laufer
- Length: 14 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Cameron Post feels a mix of guilt and relief when her parents die in a car accident. Their deaths mean they will never learn the truth she eventually comes to - that she's gay. Orphaned, Cameron comes to live with her old-fashioned grandmother and ultraconservative aunt Ruth. When she’s eventually outed, her aunt sends her to God’s Promise, a religious conversion camp that is supposed to “cure” her homosexuality. At the camp, Cameron comes face to face with the cost of denying her true identity.
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A very worthwhile Read!
- By TENA on 11-02-14
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Jack: Secret Histories
- Young Repairman Jack Series 1
- By: F. Paul Wilson
- Narrated by: Alexander Cendese
- Length: 6 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ever come across a situation that simply wasn't right - where someone was getting the dirty end of the stick and you wished you could make things right but didn't know how? Fourteen-year-old Jack knows how. Or rather he's learning how. He's discovering that he has a knack for fixing things. Not bikes or toys or appliances - situations...It all starts when Jack and his best friends, Weezy and Eddie, discover a rotting corpse - the victim of ritual murder - in the fabled New Jersey Pine Barrens. Beside the body is an ancient artifact carved with strange designs.
By: F. Paul Wilson
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The Lost Causes of Bleak Creek
- By: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal
- Narrated by: Vikas Adam
- Length: 10 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Story
At first, high school freshmen Rex McClendon and Leif Nelson believe what they’ve been told - that local students’ strange demises at Whitewood, a local reformatory, were all tragic accidents. But when the shoot for their low-budget horror masterpiece, PolterDog, goes horribly awry - and their best friend, Alicia Boykins, is sent to Whitewood - Rex and Leif are forced to question everything they know about their unassuming hometown and its cherished school for delinquents.
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Does it hold up beyond the R&L fandom?
- By BrettM on 12-01-19
By: Rhett McLaughlin, and others
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If You See Her
- By: Ania Ahlborn
- Narrated by: Brian Holden
- Length: 10 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
The house on Old Mill Road has stood in an open field for longer than Jesse Wells has been alive, its crooked windows and jutting turret tormenting the kids of Warsaw, Michigan the way only a haunted house knows how. Everyone imagines that something terrible lurks within the house’s abandoned rooms - especially Jesse and his two closest friends, Casey and Reed. But when Reed chooses the house as a backdrop for his own suicide, childhood ghost stories are transformed into a nightmare that sends Jesse into a downward spiral of grief.
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DNF. Quit halfway through. A slog.
- By Smart, AZ on 07-10-22
By: Ania Ahlborn
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Tell Me Everything
- A Novel
- By: Cambria Brockman
- Narrated by: Ariadne Meyers
- Length: 12 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In her first weeks at Hawthorne College, Malin is swept up into a tight-knit circle that will stick together through all four years. There’s Gemma, an insecure theater major from London; John, a tall, handsome, wealthy New Englander; Max, John’s cousin, a shy pre-med major; Khaled, a wisecracking prince from Abu Dhabi; and Ruby, a beautiful art history major. But Malin isn’t like the rest of her friends. She’s an expert at hiding her troubled past - all while using her extraordinary insight to detect their deepest vulnerabilities and weaknesses.
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beware
- By keith y. on 10-03-19
By: Cambria Brockman
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The Bitter and Sweet of Cherry Season
- By: Molly Fader
- Narrated by: Nancy Peterson
- Length: 9 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Everything Hope knows about the Orchard House is from the stories of her late mother. So when she arrives at the northern Michigan family estate late one night with a terrible secret and her 10-year-old daughter in tow, she’s not sure if she’ll be welcomed or turned away with a shotgun by the aunt she has never met.
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Really Enjoyed It
- By Kathryn @theBookDate on 03-30-21
By: Molly Fader
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Magic Hour
- By: Kristin Hannah
- Narrated by: Suzanne Toren
- Length: 14 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
In the rugged Pacific Northwest lies the Olympic National Forest - nearly a million acres of impenetrable darkness and impossible beauty. From deep within this old growth forest, a six-year-old girl appears. Speechless and alone, she offers no clue as to her identity, no hint of her past.
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Horrible narration
- By Howard Egan on 12-27-20
By: Kristin Hannah
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The First Husband
- By: Laura Dave
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Klett
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Annie Adams is days away from her 32nd birthday and thinks she has finally found some happiness. She visits the world's most interesting places for her syndicated travel column and she's happily cohabiting with her movie director boyfriend Nick in Los Angeles. But when Nick comes home from a meeting with his therapist (aka "futures counselor") and announces that he's taking a break from their relationship so he can pursue a woman from his past, the place Annie had come to call home is shattered.
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Meh
- By Bernice Holland on 05-16-21
By: Laura Dave
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The McAvoy Sisters Book of Secrets
- A Novel
- By: Molly Fader
- Narrated by: Nancy Peterson
- Length: 9 hrs and 43 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It’s been 17 years since the tragic summer the McAvoy sisters fell apart. Lindy, the wild one, left home, carved out a new life in the city, and never looked back. Delia, the sister who stayed, became a mother herself, raising her daughters and running the family shop in their small Ohio hometown on the shores of Lake Erie. But now, with their mother’s ailing health and a rebellious teenager to rein in, Delia has no choice but to welcome Lindy home.
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Great story
- By Nessa on 09-25-23
By: Molly Fader
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A very worthwhile Read!
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Excellent
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Eh...
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Aideen has plenty of problems she can’t solve. But when she stumbles upon overachiever Meabh Kowalska having a full-blown meltdown, she sees one that she can actually fix. Meabh is desperate to escape her crushing pile of extracurriculars. Aideen volunteers to help - by pushing her down the stairs. Problem? Solved. Meabh’s sprained ankle is the perfect excuse to ditch her overwhelming schedule. But when one of their classmates learns about their little scheme, more “clients” start asking for Aideen’s “help”.
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Fantastic book
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In the Roses of Pieria
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When Clara Eden is offered a job as an archivist working for eccentric estate owner Agatha Montague, she thinks her prayers have been answered. Soon, she finds herself sucked into the world of her research, captivated by a romantic correspondence thousands of years old. But as her feelings for her employer's assistant, Fiadh, deepen, so too does her suspicion that something about Agatha Montague isn't quite right. Unfortunately for Clara, by the time her suspicions are confirmed, it is far too late to run.
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Engaging Story and Great Audiobook Performance
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A very worthwhile Read!
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Excellent
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Eh...
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Aideen has plenty of problems she can’t solve. But when she stumbles upon overachiever Meabh Kowalska having a full-blown meltdown, she sees one that she can actually fix. Meabh is desperate to escape her crushing pile of extracurriculars. Aideen volunteers to help - by pushing her down the stairs. Problem? Solved. Meabh’s sprained ankle is the perfect excuse to ditch her overwhelming schedule. But when one of their classmates learns about their little scheme, more “clients” start asking for Aideen’s “help”.
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Aurelia Schwartz has spent twenty-three years maintaining the equilibrium between her carefully curated human life and the magical one that she endures in secret. Except, her gift of green magic has begun to fade, and if that wasn't enough to upset the balance of her life, a fateful run-in with another power-hungry witch with a penchant for stolen magic has threatened to bring it all to ruin.
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Catherine House is a school of higher learning like no other. Hidden deep in the woods of rural Pennsylvania, this crucible of reformist liberal-arts study with its experimental curriculum, wildly selective admissions policy, and formidable endowment has produced some of the world’s best minds: prize-winning authors, artists, inventors, Supreme Court justices, presidents. For those lucky few selected, tuition, room, and board are free. But acceptance comes with a price. Students are required to give the House three years - summers included - completely removed from the outside world.
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Not worth a credit - don’t bother
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A Dark and Hollow Star
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For centuries, the Eight Courts of Folk have lived among us, concealed by magic and bound by law to do no harm to humans. This arrangement has long kept peace in the Courts - until a series of gruesome and ritualistic murders rocks the city of Toronto and threatens to expose faeries to the human world. Four queer teens, each who hold a key piece of the truth behind these murders, must form a tenuous alliance in their effort to track down the mysterious killer behind these crimes. If they fail, they risk the destruction of the faerie and human worlds alike.
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Great Book
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Wish You Weren't Here
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- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Juliette doesn't hate Priya Pendley. At least, not in the way teen movies say she should hate the hot popular girl. They don't do cat fights, love triangles, or betrayal. To survive their intertwined small town lives, they’ve agreed to a truce. They complete group projects without fighting, never gossip to mutual friends, and stand on opposite sides of photos so it’s easy to crop each other out. Priya seems to have everything during the school year—social media stardom, the handsome track captain boyfriend, and millions of adoring fans—and Juliette is at peace with that.
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One of the best books ever
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Yerba Buena
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
When Sara Foster runs away from home at 16, she leaves behind not only the losses that have shattered her world but the girl she once was, capable of trust and intimacy. Years later, in Los Angeles, she is a sought-after bartender, renowned as much for her brilliant cocktails as for the mystery that clings to her. Across the city, Emilie Dubois is in a holding pattern. In her sixth year and fifth major as an undergraduate, she yearns for the beauty and community her Creole grandparents cultivated but is unable to commit.
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Too much HGTV, too many marshmallows
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Girls Made of Snow and Glass
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
At 16, Mina's mother is dead, her magician father is vicious, and her silent heart has never beat with love for anyone—has never beat at all, in fact, but she'd always thought that fact normal. She never guessed that her father cut out her heart and replaced it with one of glass. When she moves to Whitespring Castle and sees its king for the first time, Mina forms a plan: win the king's heart with her beauty, become queen, and finally know love. The only catch is that she'll have to become a stepmother.
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A welcome new twist on a lackluster classic
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The Society for Soulless Girls
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Ten years ago, four students lost their lives in the infamous unsolved North Tower murders at the elite Carvell Academy of the Arts, forcing the school to close its doors. Now Carvell is reopening, and fearless freshman Lottie Fitzwilliam is determined to find out what really happened. But when her beautiful but standoffish roommate, Alice Wolfe, stumbles upon a sinister soul-splitting ritual in a book hidden in Carvell’s library, the North Tower claims another victim. Is there a killer among them . . . or worse, within them?
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Good story overall, just disturbing at times
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Nottingham
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After a fateful hunting accident sends her on the run from the law, Robyn finds herself deep in the heart of Sherwood Forest. All she really wants to do is provide for her family and stay out of trouble, but when the damnable Sheriff of Nottingham levies the largest tax in the history of England, she's forced to take matters into her own hands.
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Delightful retelling
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By: Anna Burke
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Sawkill Girls
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
Who are the Sawkill Girls? Marion: The newbie. Awkward and plain, steady and dependable. Zoey: The pariah. Luckless and lonely, hurting but hiding it. Aching with grief and dreaming of vanished girls. Val: The queen bee. Their stories come together on the island of Sawkill Rock, where gleaming horses graze in rolling pastures and cold waves crash against black cliffs. Where kids whisper the legend of an insidious monster at parties and around campfires. Where girls have been disappearing for decades, stolen away by a ravenous evil no one has dared to fight…until now.
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Disappointed
- By Shell on 12-09-18
By: Claire Legrand
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Last Night at the Telegraph Club
- By: Malinda Lo
- Narrated by: Emily Woo Zeller
- Length: 12 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
"That book. It was about two women, and they fell in love with each other." And then Lily asked the question that had taken root in her, that was even now unfurling its leaves and demanding to be shown the sun: "Have you ever heard of such a thing?" Seventeen-year-old Lily Hu can't remember exactly when the question took root, but the answer was in full bloom the moment she and Kathleen Miller walked under the flashing neon sign of a lesbian bar called the Telegraph Club. America in 1954 is not a safe place for two girls to fall in love, especially not in Chinatown.
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Critiquing queer books
- By angelina on 04-27-21
By: Malinda Lo
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The Long Way to a Small, Angry Planet
- Wayfarers, Book 1
- By: Becky Chambers
- Narrated by: Rachel Dulude
- Length: 14 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
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Performance
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Story
Follow a motley crew on an exciting journey through space - and one adventurous young explorer who discovers the meaning of family in the far reaches of the universe - in this lighthearted debut space opera from a rising sci-fi star.
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Unbearable narrator.
- By Christian Woolley on 06-18-19
By: Becky Chambers
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Mortal Follies
- A Novel
- By: Alexis Hall
- Narrated by: Nneka Okoye
- Length: 11 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Overall
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Performance
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Story
It is the year 1814, and life for a young lady of good breeding has many difficulties. There are balls to attend, fashions to follow, marriages to consider, and, of course, the tiny complication of existing in a world swarming with fairy spirits, interfering deities, and actual straight-up sorcerers.
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Gave me PTSD from studying the classics
- By 🔥 Phx17 🔥 on 06-23-24
By: Alexis Hall
What listeners say about Plain Bad Heroines
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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Overall
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Performance
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- Jackson
- 12-14-20
This book took a long time to get nowhere
I enjoyed the ride, but the end was kind of a let down. Not enough explained for the story build up. The narrator was good, but a little too tongue in cheek even for the story. None of the characters were particularly likable. I can’t think of a better way to say this - it is a VERY millennial book. You’ll see what I mean.
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8 people found this helpful
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- Melanie Palma
- 09-11-21
Enchanted
Brugmansia arborea, a bit of witchcraft, shifting timelines and beautiful, complicated female characters.
What’s not to like?
Loved it…
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- Laura Howell
- 01-22-24
surprisingly good
the narrator took some getting used to, she seemed a bit monotone at times and the characters as a result sounded very similar and oftentimes made it difficult to differentiate. that's the only complaint, she's really good otherwise! the book was fantastic, and always kept me on my toes. will read again.
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- Desi
- 01-31-24
what Rebecca should have been
great story, engaging and at times unsettling! would love to find more books just like this.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Brett B
- 09-07-21
Whoa
That was excellent. And Xe Sands' narration...superb. Love the weaving of storylines, the characters, and the pace. It's a slow burn, a story to drink in and savor, sip by sip.
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- Kindle Customer
- 04-06-21
I loved the narrator
I loved the narrator's voice. she really made it come to life. I liked that there were so many different character backgrounds included. It really let me get invested in the story and want to know more. Also it is nice to hear a story with many queer ladies both in the past and present represented, as well as other queer people.
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- Matthew Harris
- 01-20-23
Wonderful narration
Wonderful narration with a compelling plot and characters. I would definitely recommend this title to you.
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- Kenny Cook
- 08-09-21
Pleasantly surprised by this book...
I must say that I was pleasantly surprised by this book. I got it because I LOVE anything and everything Xe Sands does. Then realized that a Lesbian horror story was really great!
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- D. Rowland
- 04-18-22
Slow burn, engaging listen, very queer
The dual timelines, entrenched queerness, and slow burn of the spooky all made for an engaging listen. I'm still chewing on the story as a whole and whether it was actually satisfying for me.
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- Knielsen
- 08-05-22
Such a great book! Highly recommend!
I wasn’t expecting much, but this was one of the best fiction books I’ve read in a while. I love how much it weaves in history and I hope someone makes a film out of this very meta story one day. It’s great to read in a ladies book club ;)
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