The Blonde Dies First
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Narrated by:
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Joniece Abbott-Pratt
About this listen
A group of friends fight to choose their own fates in this trope-savvy, self-referential young adult thriller from the acclaimed author of Their Vicious Games, about a demonic force that acts according to horror movie rules in the spirit of the Scream movies.
Devon is always being left behind by her genius twin sister, Drew. At this point, it’s a fact of life. But Devon has one last plan before Drew leaves for college a whole year early—The Best Summer Ever. After committing to the bit a little too much, the twins and their chaotic circle of friends learn why you don’t ever mess with a Ouija board if you want to actually survive the Best Summer Ever, and soon find themselves being hunted down by…a demon?
But while there’s no mistaking the creeping, venomous figure is not from around here, their method doesn’t feel very demonic at all. In fact, it’s downright human—going after them in typical slasher movie kill order. And that means Devon, the blonde, is up first and her decade-long crush, Yaya, is the Final Girl who must kill or be killed to end the cycle.
Devon has never liked playing by anyone else’s rules though, not even a demon’s, and the longer this goes on, the more she feels Drew and Yaya slipping away from her even as she tries to help them all survive. Can they use their horror movie knowledge to flip the script and become the hunters instead of the hunted? Or will their best summer ever be their last?
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Story
Seventeen-year-old Megan Allen has been jumping from friend group to friend group in her high school, trying on identities like outfits. Nothing ever seems to fit—until she meets LC, the adventurous, charismatic girl who appears at her favorite coffee shop one day like magic. Finally, Megan feels like she’s becoming the person she’s meant to be: someone like LC. On the night of their friendiversary, what was supposed to be a bonding experience ends in a waking nightmare. Suddenly, Megan is no longer herself. Too late, she realizes that LC has secrets—dangerous ones.
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wow
- By Zee on 12-11-24
By: Nia Davenport
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I Feed Her to the Beast and the Beast Is Me
- By: Jamison Shea
- Narrated by: Kristolyn Lloyd
- Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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Laure Mesny is a perfectionist with an axe to grind. Despite being constantly overlooked in the elite and cutthroat world of the Parisian ballet, she will do anything to prove that a Black girl can take center stage. To level the playing field, Laure ventures deep into the depths of the Catacombs and strikes a deal with a pulsating river of blood. The primordial power Laure gains promises influence and adoration, everything she’s dreamed of and worked toward. With retribution on her mind, she surpasses her bitter and privileged peers, leaving broken bodies behind her on her climb to stardom.
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Phenomenal
- By Anonymous User on 09-06-23
By: Jamison Shea
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You're Not Supposed to Die Tonight
- By: Kalynn Bayron
- Narrated by: Hewot Tedla
- Length: 6 hrs and 14 mins
- Unabridged
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Charity Curtis has the summer job of her dreams, playing the “final girl” at Camp Mirror Lake. Guests pay to be scared in this full-contact terror game, as Charity and her summer crew recreate scenes from a classic slasher film, Curse of Camp Mirror Lake. The more realistic the fear, the better for business. But the last weekend of the season, Charity’s co-workers begin disappearing. And when one ends up dead, Charity’s role as the final girl suddenly becomes all too real. If Charity and her girlfriend Bezi hope to survive the night, they’ll need figure out what this killer is after.
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There's a twist that I was not expecting!!
- By FelicaReads on 07-03-24
By: Kalynn Bayron
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There's No Way I'd Die First
- By: Lisa Springer
- Narrated by: Nekia Renee Martin
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Seventeen-year-old Noelle Layne knows horror. Every trope, every warning sign, every survival tactic. She even leads a successful movie club dedicated to the genre. Who better to throw the ultimate, most exclusive Halloween party on all of Long Island? With some of the top influencers in her school on the guest list, including gorgeous singer-songwriter Archer Mitchell, her popularity is bound to spike. She could really use the social boost for an upcoming brand expansion. Nothing is going to ruin this party.
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Awesome
- By K. D. on 09-23-23
By: Lisa Springer
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Your Lonely Nights Are Over
- By: Adam Sass
- Narrated by: Mark Sanderlin, Griffin Puatu, Torian Brackett
- Length: 9 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Dearie and Cole are inseparable, unlikeable, and (in bad luck for them) totally unbelievable. From the day they met, Dearie and Cole have been two against the world. But whenever something bad happens at Stone Grove High School, they get blamed. Why? They’re beautiful, flirtatious, dangerously clever queen bees, and they’re always ready to call out their fellow students. But they’ve never faced a bigger threat than surviving senior year, when Mr. Sandman, a famous, never-caught serial killer emerges from a long retirement—and his hunting ground is their school Queer Club.
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Amazing depiction of teen friendship
- By Anonymous User on 11-05-24
By: Adam Sass
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The Poisons We Drink
- By: Bethany Baptiste
- Narrated by: Lynnette R. Freeman
- Length: 16 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
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In a country divided between humans and witchers, Venus Stoneheart hustles as a brewer making illegal love potions to support her family. Love potions is a dangerous business. Brewing has painful, debilitating side effects, and getting caught means death or a prison sentence. But what Venus is most afraid of is the dark, sentient magic within her. Then an enemy's iron bullet kills her mother, Venus's life implodes. When the powerful Grand Witcher, the ruthless head of her coven, offers Venus the chance to punish her mother's killer, she has to pay a steep price for revenge.
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enjoyable
- By Emm Muk on 05-12-24
By: Bethany Baptiste
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So Witches We Became
- By: Jill Baguchinsky
- Narrated by: Jeremy Carlisle Parker, Kristin James
- Length: 11 hrs
- Unabridged
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For high school senior Nell and her friends, a vacation house on a private Florida island sounds like the makings of a dream spring break. But Nell brings secrets with her—secrets that fuse with the island's tragic history, trapping them all with a curse that surrounds the island in a toxic, vengeful mist and the surrounding waters with an unseen, devouring beast. Getting out alive means risking her friendships, her sanity, and even her own life.
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The meaning behind the story is so strong and so many can relate.
- By Sarah on 09-05-24
By: Jill Baguchinsky
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Heads Will Roll
- By: Josh Winning
- Narrated by: EJ Lavery
- Length: 9 hrs and 21 mins
- Unabridged
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After sitcom star Willow tweets herself into infamy and stumbles blind-drunk into a swimming pool, her agent ships her off to Camp Castaway. Nestled deep in upstate New York, Castaway is a summer camp for adults who are desperate to leave their mistakes behind. No real names, no phones . . . no way to call for help. Willow’s fellow campers seem okay. Her own favorite actress is even here, making a s’more. And did that jaded writer, Dani, just wink at her?
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Excellent Narration
- By Anonymous User on 11-24-24
By: Josh Winning
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Ace of Spades
- By: Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé
- Narrated by: Jeanette Illidge, Tapiwa Mugweni
- Length: 13 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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When two Niveus Private Academy students, Devon Richards and Chiamaka Adebayo, are selected to be part of the elite school’s senior class prefects, it looks like their year is off to an amazing start. After all, not only does it look great on college applications, but it officially puts each of them in the running for valedictorian, too. Shortly after the announcement is made, though, someone who goes by Aces begins using anonymous text messages to reveal secrets about the two of them that turn their lives upside down and threaten every aspect of their carefully planned futures.
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Not for me
- By Bee on 10-29-21
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Where Sleeping Girls Lie
- By: Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé
- Narrated by: Natalie Simpson
- Length: 16 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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In Where Sleeping Girls Lie—a YA contemporary mystery by Faridah Àbíké-Íyímídé, the New York Times-bestselling author of Ace of Spades—a girl new to boarding school discovers dark secrets and coverups after her roommate disappears.
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Great narration slow and sometimes boring
- By Christina Smith on 12-13-24
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This Ravenous Fate
- This Ravenous Fate, Book 1
- By: Hayley Dennings
- Narrated by: Tamika Katon-Donegal
- Length: 14 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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It’s 1926, and reapers are growing stronger everywhere. Created centuries ago by cruel medical experiments, these once-human vampires are driven to attack without mercy. Those who protect the city from them hold more power than even the organized criminals who run the nightclubs. As the reluctant heir to her father’s reaper-hunting empire, Elise Saint knows that the Harlem reapers want her dead. Among them is Layla Quinn, who lost her parents, the protection of the Saints, and her humanity the night she was turned into a reaper. And she’ll never forget how Elise Saint betrayed her.
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Kept me interested
- By K. Wilks on 12-30-24
By: Hayley Dennings
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Delicious Monsters
- By: Liselle Sambury
- Narrated by: Sandra Okuboyejo, Angel Pean
- Length: 15 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
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Daisy sees dead people—something impossible to forget in bustling, ghost-packed Toronto. She usually manages to deal with her unwanted ability, but she’s completely unprepared to be dumped by her boyfriend. So when her mother inherits a secluded mansion in northern Ontario where she spent her childhood summers, Daisy jumps at the chance to escape. But the house is nothing like Daisy expects, and she begins to realize that her experience with the supernatural might be no match for her mother’s secrets, nor what lurks within these walls…
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Just what you need to hear
- By Autumn Ray on 04-04-23
By: Liselle Sambury
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The Dark We Know
- By: Wen-Yi Lee
- Narrated by: Natalie Naudus
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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Growing up in Slater, Isadora Chang never felt at ease in the repressive small town, even before she realized she was bisexual—but after the deaths of two childhood friends, Slater went from feeling claustrophobic to suffocating. So, Isa took off before the town could swallow her, too. Even though it meant leaving everything she knew behind, including her last surviving friend, Mason. When Isa’s abusive father dies, however, she agrees to come back from art school just long enough to collect the inheritance. But then Mason turns up at the cemetery with a revelation and a plea.
By: Wen-Yi Lee
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Sleep Like Death
- By: Kalynn Bayron
- Narrated by: Hewot Tedla
- Length: 9 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Princess Eve was raised with one purpose: to destroy the Knight, an evil sorcerer who terrorizes Queens Bridge with his wicked magic. Her own unique magic--the ability to conjure weapons from nature--makes her a worthy adversary. Far too many of subjects of Queens Bridge have been devastated by the Knight’s trickery. As she approaches her seventeenth birthday, Eve is ready to battle. But her mother, Queen Regina, has been acting bizarrely, talking to a strange mirror alone every night.
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The delivery of the audiobook
- By Yi'Sheika Lawrence on 07-06-24
By: Kalynn Bayron
What listeners say about The Blonde Dies First
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- BookedNBougie
- 09-19-24
Wow, Joelle does it again!!
Loved this fast paced, dynamic, YA homage to slasher films. It kept me on the edge of my seat & i didn’t want to put it down. The dynamics between the friend group were well developed & their banter was stellar.
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- Bria
- 10-19-24
Great read
Loved this book. It was an easy read and I was hooked once I started.
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- Danniv83
- 08-11-24
Fun, Nostalgic & Clever
I don’t know bout you but being an adult reader in the YA world hits different. This story was just such a fun dive into old school horror elements but with much of today’s quirks. You felt as if you had each one of these kinds of friends growing up. Narration was great and the story had me guessing.
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- Juno
- 10-23-24
Good book but pretty predictable
I enjoyed the modern commentary but the horror story within was predictable to horror fans.
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