The Sex Talk You Never Got
Reclaiming the Heart of Masculine Sexuality
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Narrated by:
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Sam Jolman
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John Eldredge
About this listen
Read by the author.
Men today are starved for sexual formation. They've been failed by parents, churches, and culture alike, leading to widespread shame, confusion, and brokenness in the area of sexuality. In The Sex Talk You Never Got, therapist Sam Jolman helps men reconnect their God-given sexuality with innocence, awe, and joy, and shows listeners how to celebrate--instead of struggle against--the gift of sexual desire.
In our sex-saturated world, it might seem surprising that men need more talk about sex. But the reality is that sexuality is one of the most neglected aspects of men's lives. From the woefully inadequate sex talks many young men receive from parents (little more than an anatomy lesson or a purity lecture, if anything at all) to cultural messages that unhelpfully weave both shame and permissiveness into men's understanding of their own sexuality and masculinity, too many boys and men experience sexual desire as an area of struggle, confusion, and brokenness.
But it doesn't need to be this way. God made men to be moved, to live with wonder and awe--and sexual desire must be formed within the context of that design. Sam Jolman, a professional therapist who specializes in men's issues and sexual trauma recovery, shows men the way out of the wilds of sexual struggle.
This timely and incisive book will help listeners:
- learn about the vital link between sexual desire and their identity as worshipers;
- regain a wild and vigorous sexuality within the context of God's design;
- understand how purity culture has needlessly put men in a conflict-ridden relationship with their sexuality;
- see sexual purity not as the goal but as the preparation for becoming fully alive to beauty, awe, and worship; and
- discover how to trade shame and confusion for a sexuality that's filled with innocence and wonder.
In the Bible, Jesus' greatest kindness was often offered to those suffering sexual harm and brokenness. He offers this same kindness today. He does not want men to repent of their sexual desire. Rather, through reconnecting sexuality with innocence and awe, God opens the door for men to experience the wild joy of desire, rightly ordered toward worship and God's good purposes for their life.
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- By: Les Standiford
- Narrated by: Jonathan Davis
- Length: 5 hrs and 50 mins
- Unabridged
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Just before Christmas in 1843, a debt-ridden and dispirited Charles Dickens wrote a small book he hoped would keep his creditors at bay. His publisher turned it down, so Dickens used what little money he had to put out A Christmas Carol himself. He worried it might be the end of his career as a novelist. The book immediately caused a sensation. And it breathed new life into a holiday that had fallen into disfavor, undermined by lingering Puritanism and the cold modernity of the Industrial Revolution.
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Beautifully Told!
- By JodyB on 12-01-17
By: Les Standiford
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My Big TOE: Awakening
- Book One of a Trilogy Unifying Philosophy, Physics, and Metaphysics
- By: Thomas Campbell
- Narrated by: Thomas Campbell
- Length: 11 hrs and 11 mins
- Unabridged
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My Big TOE: Awakening, written by a nuclear physicist in the language of contemporary culture, unifies science and philosophy, physics and metaphysics, mind and matter, purpose and meaning, the normal and the paranormal. The entirety of human experience (mind, body, and spirit) including both our objective and subjective worlds is brought together under one seamless scientific understanding.
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What a Trip (but to where?)
- By Michael on 11-26-13
By: Thomas Campbell
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Neville Goddard: The Complete Reader
- By: Neville Goddard
- Narrated by: Barry J. Peterson
- Length: 14 hrs and 46 mins
- Unabridged
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Neville Goddard: The Complete Reader, Includes all 10 of Neville Goddard's Spiritual Classics: At Your Command, Awakened Imagination & the Search, Feeling is the Secret, Freedom For All, Out of This World, Prayer, The Art of Believing, Seedtime and Harvest, The Law and The Promise, The Power of Awareness, and Your Faith Is Your Fortune. If you are familiar with the great American mystic, this will be a goldmine of wisdom in one book. If you are new to his work, you are in for a spiritual journey.
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Hidden Gem
- By TrauntsiePants on 05-22-18
By: Neville Goddard
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The Pagan World
- Ancient Religions Before Christianity
- By: Hans-Friedrich Mueller, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Hans-Friedrich Mueller
- Length: 12 hrs and 34 mins
- Original Recording
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In The Pagan World: Ancient Religions Before Christianity, you will meet the fascinating, ancient polytheistic peoples of the Mediterranean and beyond, their many gods and goddesses, and their public and private worship practices, as you come to appreciate the foundational role religion played in their lives. Professor Hans-Friedrich Mueller, of Union College in Schenectady, New York, makes this ancient world come alive in 24 lectures with captivating stories of intrigue, artifacts, illustrations, and detailed descriptions from primary sources of intriguing personalities.
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The Pagan World
- By arnold e andersen md Dr Andersen on 03-28-20
By: Hans-Friedrich Mueller, and others
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Super Attractor
- Methods for Manifesting a Life Beyond Your Wildest Dreams
- By: Gabrielle Bernstein
- Narrated by: Gabrielle Bernstein
- Length: 6 hrs and 25 mins
- Unabridged
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Ready to turn what you want into the life that you live? The number-one New York Times best-selling author of The Universe Has Your Back shows you how. In Super Attractor, Gabrielle Bernstein lays out the essential methods for manifesting a life beyond your wildest dreams. This book is a journey of remembering where your true power lies. You'll learn how to co-create the life you want. You'll accept that life can flow, that attracting is fun, and that you don't have to work so hard to get what you want.
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Not a huge fan
- By Pamela H on 09-30-19
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Medieval Myths & Mysteries
- By: Dorsey Armstrong, The Great Courses
- Narrated by: Dorsey Armstrong
- Length: 5 hrs and 6 mins
- Original Recording
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The 10 enlightening (and often humorous) lectures of Medieval Myths and Mysteries will show you how far from the “dark” times of legend these centuries were. Uncover the facts about the Knights Templar. Reveal the truth behind the tales of legendary creatures like the Questing Beast and the unicorn. Trace the events of the Black Death and the ways it altered the world in its wake, and much more. With Professor Armstrong, you will dig deep into the ways that later generations reshaped the narrative of the medieval years and perpetuated the myths.
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Interesting, but centered on Britain
- By Ximena on 04-10-20
By: Dorsey Armstrong, and others
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great reading
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For Such A Time As This
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What if the goal of raising a Christian girl was about more than keeping her virginity intact? What if it was about raising a strong, independent young woman who knows who she is, uses her voice, and confidently steps into the life God has for her? From the authors of The Great Sex Rescue comes this evidence-based book grounded on surveys of over 28,000 women to offer moms a fresh, freeing, and biblically grounded message of sexuality and self-worth for their daughters that is less about the don'ts and more about the dos.
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If you are a parent or ministry leader of women or young girls, I plead with you to read this book
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The Paradise King
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The Bible is a piercing drama, a tale of prophets and wandering spirits, heroic mothers and flashing swords, cosmic mountains, and a dry, shadowy Sheol. It is a true story that defines the nature and purpose of reality, and its claims are astonishing. But few modern listeners experience the Bible that way. In this groundbreaking audiobook, celebrated storyteller Blaine Eldredge draws upon years of research to illuminate the story of the Bible through the lives of six kingly characters.
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Wildly important book but narration needs work
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By: Blaine Eldredge
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The Great Sex Rescue
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Based on a groundbreaking in-depth survey of 22,000 Christian women, The Great Sex Rescue unlocks the secrets to what makes some marriages red hot while others fizzle out. Generations of women have grown up with messages about sex that make them feel dirty, used, or invisible, while men have been sold such a cheapened version of sex, they don't know what they're missing. The Great Sex Rescue hopes to turn all of that around, developing a truly biblical view of sex where mutuality, intimacy, and passion reign.
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Controversial message from questionable material
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By: Sheila Wray Gregoire, and others
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Waking the Dead
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Jesus said, "I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full." That's the offer of Christianity, from God himself.
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I've been Awakened!
- By Ryan on 08-26-04
By: John Eldredge
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The Sacred Romance (Revised and Updated Edition)
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We have lost touch with our hearts. In the pursuit of efficiency, success, and the busyness of our lives we have only been left with emptiness and longing. If you're feeling lost, disconnected, wounded, broken, or if your heart just aches for something more, you’ve come to the right place. In The Sacred Romance, bestselling authors John Eldredge and Brent Curtis invite you to join them as they explore the greatest love of our lives: a relationship with the God who pursues us.
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too much of Forest Gump!
- By Amazon Customer on 12-09-24
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Rethinking Sexuality
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- By: Dr. Juli Slattery, Gary Thomas - Foreword by
- Narrated by: Dr. Juli Slattery
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Sexual abuse, sex addiction, gender confusion, brokenness, and shame plague today's world, and people are seeking clarity and hope. By contesting long-held cultural paradigms, this book equips you to see how sexuality is rooted in the broader context of God's heart and his work for us on earth. Instead of arguing with the world about what's right and wrong about sexual choices, this practical resource equips you to share the love and grace of Jesus as you encounter the pain of sexual brokenness - your own or someone else's.
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Raw, Real, & Honest
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By: Dr. Juli Slattery, and others
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The Naked Marriage
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- Unabridged
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Imagine a marriage with complete intimacy, vulnerability, transparency, and trust. Imagine a marriage rooted in faith, friendship, and mutual fulfillment. Imagine a marriage with amazing sex, but where great sex is only the icing on the cake. This might all sound too good to be true, but it's actually what God designed marriage to be, and he doesn't want you settling for anything less.
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Amazing read
- By Weaver on 03-03-20
By: Dave Willis, and others
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Captivating
- Unveiling the Mystery of a Woman's Soul
- By: John Eldredge, Stasi Eldredge
- Narrated by: John Eldredge, Stasi Eldredge
- Length: 8 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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What Wild at Heart did for men, Captivating is doing for women: setting their hearts free. This groundbreaking audiobook shows listeners the glorious design of women before the fall, describes how the feminine heart can be restored, and casts a vision for the power, freedom, and beauty of a woman released to be all she was meant to be.
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This will change you
- By “Me” on 10-31-15
By: John Eldredge, and others
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Beyond Shame
- Creating a Healthy Sex Life on Your Own Terms
- By: Matthias Roberts, Tina Schermer Sellers - foreword
- Narrated by: Timothy Andrés Pabon
- Length: 5 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
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We all carry sexual shame. Whether we grew up in the repressive purity culture of American Evangelical Christianity or not, we've all been taught in subtle and not-so-subtle ways that sex (outside of very specific contexts) is immoral and taboo. Psychotherapist Matthias Roberts helps listeners overcome their shame around sex by overcoming three unhealthy coping mechanisms we use to manage that shame.
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Good info, but author is close minded
- By Anonymous User on 04-07-22
By: Matthias Roberts, and others
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The Art of Bringing Back the Intimacy
- Learn to Avoid the Dead Bedroom, Eliminate the Resentment, and Relight the Libido in Your Relationship
- By: Andrew Glover
- Narrated by: Megan Meyer
- Length: 3 hrs and 17 mins
- Unabridged
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It can be hard when you are the partner with a higher sex drive. You can be left feeling rejected, unattractive, frustrated, and confused–and it’s likely your spouse doesn’t even realize you feel this way. And if you are the partner with the lower drive, you feel guilty, pressured, and frustrated, not sure how to move past this roadblock.
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Enlightening
- By Aries Johnson on 03-31-23
By: Andrew Glover
What listeners say about The Sex Talk You Never Got
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- John Scoggins
- 10-17-24
This book (albeit unfortunately) should be mandatory reading for men for are truly seeking to connect to their spouses.
The stories shared within this book are guaranteed to reach you in some way. I was nearly moved to tears in the later chapters as Sam expressed many of the feelings/emotions I have buried deep down inside and had no idea how to deal with.
This book is a phenomenal resource in this current day and age where father’s are doing a very poor job of educating their sons about their masculinity and sex. I highly recommend listening to this book.
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- D. Barry
- 12-12-24
Deeply healing
This is a deep and profound vision for male sexuality. Very thoughtful and heartfelt and healthy. Vast improvement over the toxic advice that comes out of the evangelical world over the last few decades.
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- Lisa A. Barber
- 12-14-24
This book fills a much needed deficit in our culture
It is refreshing to hear sexuality discussed with such authenticity and emotional maturity in a biblically sound and scientifically correct manner. This book fills a gaping hole in the Christian ecosphere. I highly recommend this book. Mark Barber DO -Board Certified in Family Medicine.
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- Elisabeth Louise Mizner
- 07-15-24
Very encouraging
Loved his view point on sexuality and all that goes with it. Thanks for writing this book I wished everyone would take the time to listen/read it
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- Anonymous User
- 07-17-24
Solid, Comprehensive, Life-Changing
Sam has written a book that every man, young and old, must read. My hope is for this book to reach men all over the world and create a lasting change toward comprehensive manhood with a healthy and life-giving sense of sensuality and true arousal.
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- Amazon Customer
- 08-23-24
Should be a must read for all engaged men and women
This book so beautifully clears up common misconceptions about sex. It calls men to be more than just lustful ejaculators - it’s a call to truly love in the purest sense of the word. It’s a call to avoid objectifying women and calls out the common church teachings that allow just that. It’s full of both scripture and study references. It’s packed full of deep, thought provoking soul-churning information while still being and easy, conversational read.
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- Denzel Bridges
- 08-10-24
Absolute, edifying blessing
I found this book in my recommendations when I felt in my heart of hearts that something was off, if not missing. This book helped me explore many of those feelings and I feel my heart beat stronger for it. Will absolutely revisit it real soon! Thank you Sam Jolman and God bless!
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- Lance Sellon
- 11-15-24
Gritty and Healing - Immediately Reading Again
I ignored my cognitive, physiological, and spiritual trauma regarding my masculine sexuality for 30+ years. Jolman invited and lead me into an approachable discussion with myself. Healing enroute.
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- Raymond Terwilliger
- 11-24-24
Deeply Healing and Hopefull
Can't recommend this book enough for anyone who struggles with unwanted sexual behaviors. This book gives one a new and fresh perspective on what it means to a awaken the heart of the man God created to love and make a real difference in this dark world.
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- Sandra
- 06-24-24
A must read!
Sam brings new light and meaning to healthy male sexuality in The Church and beyond. Men have been stunted by The Church’s doomsday messages regarding male sexuality and insatiable lust & desire. These messages often are like a self-fulfilling prophecy. The damaging messages most Christian sex books for men are inundated with, Sam kindly sets right.
With Sam’s careful and thoughtful reintroduction into a man’s true lover heart, he gives hope for present and future generations of men to delve into their stories and reclaim innocence. With this book and hopefully others like it to come, we can begin to turn the tide and see men rise up to what God created them to be in their sexuality.
As a mother of two boys, it has been my heart to relearn what healthy sexuality is for men. My husband and I decided to read this book together and it has been so insightful and stirred up many good conversations. We were the product of purity culture and only in the last few years have figured out that purity culture and all we were taught and read was really at the root of some of our deepest struggles in marriage. We desperately want better for our boys as they grow and become men and know that we cannot pass on what we do not hold ourselves. It is in this process of relearning that Sam’s book came out. What a blessing!
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