What really matters—and what’s just noise? In this episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine invite you to hit pause and reflect with Chapter 25: “Decide What Matters Most.” If you’ve ever felt torn between speaking up or letting something go, this gentle nudge is for you.

What’s the Big Idea?

• Discover how to spot the difference between life’s real priorities and those little annoyances that try to steal your peace.
• Hear how Harry and Connie navigate tricky moments in family, work, and everyday life.
• Get inspired to build your own “green room” of trusted voices, so you can check your perspective before reacting.
• Walk away with a powerful question to ask yourself next time you’re caught in the moment (it might just change your day).

You won’t get a list of dos and don’ts here—just relatable stories, practical wisdom, and a few surprising insights that will have you examining what’s truly important. Whether you’re looking for tips on prioritization, self-reflection, or simply want to show up as your best self, this episode is packed with inspiration (and a little Victor Hugo for good measure).

Ready to focus on what matters most? Hit play and join us for a conversation that might just change the way you see your day.

(Mini-episode, maximum perspective—perfect for your next walk, coffee break, or moment of reflection!)

Reference Links:

Be the Sun, Not the Salt book

Tim Storey podcast episode: Miracle Mentality: Using Your Gifts

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever catch yourself feeling a little off your game? 🤔 In this episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine explore Chapter 24: “Remember Who You Are” - your gentle nudge to reconnect with your best self, live authentically, and shine a little brighter every day.

Why does remembering who you are matter?

• 🌟 Identity shapes action: As James Clear puts it in Atomic Habits, every action you take is a vote for the person you want to become. When you act in line with your core values, everything else flows.
• 🧘‍♂️ Be heliotropic: Showing up as your true, positive self not only uplifts you but everyone around you-a triple win for personal growth, mindfulness, and positive relationships.
• 💡 Small moments, big impact: From picking up litter to pausing before a snarky comment, the little choices you make each day reinforce who you are and who you want to be.

Harry and Connie get real about the challenge of consistency-why it’s easy to know what your best self would do, but not always easy to do it. They break down the “five-to-one rule” (how negative moments sting way more than positive ones), and share practical stories about patience, mindfulness, and the magic of even the smallest acts of kindness.

Your gentle nudge: Next time you’re in a tough spot, ask yourself: “What would my best, most heliotropic self do right now?” Then do that. It’s simple, powerful, and the secret to living a sunnier, more fulfilling life.

Perfect for anyone searching for inspiration on personal growth, living authentically, mindfulness, and how to be your best self-even on the tough days. Tune in for heartfelt stories, actionable wisdom, and your weekly reminder to remember who you are and shine bright! 🌞

(Mini-episode, maximum impact-perfect for your next coffee break, commute, or mindful moment!)

Reference Links

Be the Sun, Not the Salt book

James Clear’s book, Atomic Habits

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.

Ever feel like your emotions are running the show instead of you? 😵‍💫 In this episode of Be the Sun, Not the Salt, we’re thrilled to welcome Dr. Ethan Kross, world-renowned expert on emotional regulation and bestselling author of Chatter and Shift. Together with Dr. Harry Cohen and Connie Fontaine, Ethan dives deep into the science and practical tools for managing your inner voice, controlling emotional chatter, and harnessing your feelings instead of being overwhelmed by them.

What you’ll learn:

• 🧠 How managing your emotions boosts your thinking, performance, relationships, and health
• 🗣️ Why self-talk in the third person (“Ethan, you got this!”) can calm your mind and reduce stress
• ⏳ Additional simple, science-backed techniques like mental time travel, expressive writing, and sensory shifts to regulate emotions
• 🤝 The power of emotional advisors and social proof to help you gain perspective and resilience
• 💡 Why venting and rumination often backfire-and what to do instead

Harry and Connie share personal stories about putting Ethan’s tools into practice, from calming pre-dive nerves to leading with emotional steadiness in daily life. Whether you’re a leader, parent, or just someone who wants to feel less “salty” and more in control, this episode is packed with actionable insights to help you be the sun, not the salt.

About Ethan Kross

Dr. Ethan Kross is a Professor in the University of Michigan’s Psychology Department and Ross School of Business, and director of the Emotion & Self-Control Lab. His groundbreaking research on emotion regulation and self-talk has been featured in The New York Times, The Wall Street Journal, The New Yorker, and on major broadcasts like CBS Evening News and NPR’s Morning Edition. Ethan is the bestselling author of Chatter: The Voice in Our Head, Why It Matters, and How to Harness It and Shift: Managing Your Emotions So They Don’t Manage You.

Helpful Links

• Learn more about Ethan Kross and his research: University of Michigan Faculty Profile
• Get Chatter and Shift on Amazon
• Watch Ethan’s popular TED Talk on mastering your inner voice: YouTube
• Follow Ethan on X and Instagram @ethankross
• All about Be the Sun, Not the Salt

Tune in for this inspiring conversation that will change how you think about your emotions-and give you the tools to master your inner chatter for a healthier, happier life. 🌞

To explore the book, or for more episodes, information, tips and tools to live a more heliotropic life, visit us at bethesunnotthesalt.com and find us on Facebook, Instagram, LinkedIn and TikTok.