Buckle up, because this episode of The Viktor Wilt Show flew off the rails like a greased pig on roller skates. It all started with a totally rational conversation about senior pranks—which somehow escalated into felony charges over plastic wrap in Pennsylvania. Viktor recalled the good ol’ days when pranks involved just spray painting a rock, unlike now, when you sneeze wrong in a school and get hit with five misdemeanors and a federal investigation. Then “Caveman” called in and confessed to dropping fart powder in a teacher’s Diet Coke like it was a harmless 90s sitcom bit instead of literal assault. But it’s fine! Statute of limitations, right?

We got international too, with a man caught smuggling 46 kilos of weed into Sri Lanka who blamed his suitcases for magically filling themselves. His biggest complaint in prison? “The food’s too spicy.” Bro, you tried to drug mule your way into a firing squad. Then a human leg washed up on a UK beach, and Viktor couldn’t stop scrolling looking for the picture (we’re not judging, but we are). Somewhere in the madness, he warned people not to put weaponized bumper stickers on their cars—yes, that’s a real thing now. “Don’t be a [blank]” might just get you life in prison… in Britain.

There were dangerous ants, Bigfoot sightings deemed “credible” because, um, someone said so, and unsolicited marriage advice from Viktor urging people not to legally bind themselves to someone before they’ve finished puberty. And then, the real chaos: THE BURGER WARS. Yelp dropped a controversial 2025 burger chain ranking and the outrage was nuclear. White Castle ranked over Wendy’s? Freddy’s fries vs. tots? Culver’s declared superior to In-N-Out by the Viktor-Peaches alliance? Burger King slander at DEFCON 5? Absolute carnage.

In the end, someone won a $200 Visa gift card, nobody got defecated on (unlike the recent road rage news), and if you take anything from this fever dream of a broadcast, it’s this: don’t smuggle weed, don’t prank your teachers with chemicals, and for the love of God, don’t you dare say Burger King is better than Arby’s.

(0:00) Senior prank leads to felony charges for a number of students
(5:20) Traveler busted with two suitcases packed to the brim with marijuana has no idea where it came from
(8:04) Human leg washes up on beach and is described as "very graphic"
(9:59) Woman arrested in the UK for bumper sticker with a bad word on it
(14:04) "Credible" bigfoot sighting in Michigan, Asian Needle Ants in SC, pennies to be discontinued
(19:21) Couple that married at a very young age having relationship problems
(23:44) Chatting with Peaches about a Best Burger Chain list

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Strap in because this episode of Traffic School was absolute chaos—in the best way possible. We had a jam-packed studio with Ben from the Advocates Injury Attorneys and Lieutenant Crain of the Idaho State Police, who started the show wrestling with his headphones like they were resisting arrest. Then boom—out came a fat stack of figure-eight race tickets from Crain and a $200 Visa gift card from Ben, all before a single caller got through. We learned that Ben's got a car so fast it doesn't even bother with a 60mph mark—it just blinks and you're there. Meanwhile, Viktor confessed his birthday plans were toast thanks to a waterlogged brother and ghosting children, but hey, maybe his someone will buy him a friend.

Then the callers started rolling in: Reckless John kicked things off, practically begging law enforcement to storm the mountains for helmet violations. Carl showed up with a Pinto towing more trailers than a semi, talking Saturday night cruises and inviting Ben for burgers. Parker dove deep on the deadly sins of distracted driving, while Blake launched into a philosophical debate about merging lanes and cruise control etiquette. Mitch dropped a question about outlaw tires sticking past fenders—surprise, that's illegal, people! Scott played insurance roulette, hoping lapsed paperwork wouldn’t land him in jail (close call, buddy). Then came Craig, wondering how fast you're allowed to speed just to pass someone—turns out not “motorcycle math fast,” but pretty flexible still.

And just when you thought the madness peaked, sparkly Jen called in to ask if wearing a shirt shiny enough to blind drivers could make her liable in a crash. The answer? Only if she’s driving a disco ball down I-15. But plot twist! Jen was caller number eight—the magical mystery number—and walked away $200 richer and with plans to buy even more dazzling shirts.

From ticket stacks to traffic law hacks and vehicular fashion hazards, this episode was a rollercoaster of ridiculousness, and honestly, we wouldn’t want it any other way.

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Buckle up, because this episode of The Viktor Wilt Show was a glorious, caffeinated fever dream that tumbled from doomsday AI predictions to chicken-poo-induced brain inflammation without missing a beat. Viktor kicked things off by spiraling into the uncanny valley of AI content dominating the internet—babies yeeted from planes, celebrity savior hallucinations, and Elon Musk’s soot-covered baby-rescue missions—before lamenting the slow death of authenticity on social media and even in homework (cheers to ChatGPT-powered cheating, kids!). Then came the pivot to optimism, with talk of Alzheimer’s research and hands-free dog leashes made by a guy from Rigby (who Viktor might kinda know but isn’t sure). Cue the world's tallest dog, Peaches the lonely DJ, and a hypothetical leash-powered dog-and-DJ parade through East Idaho.

Then WHAM—the chaos of Viktor’s personal life exploded onto the airwaves like a Windows update from hell. His computer died. His tire bill self-destructed with surprise interest fees. His fridge was empty. His lawn was an embarrassment. He wanted to punch himself in the face. But he trudged on like a warrior of the airwaves, venting through the mic like it was group therapy.

But wait—there’s more. Deadly cucumbers, bird-poo lung infections, water-breaking TV anchors who finish their shows before giving birth, heroic bearded dragons saving their owners from house fires, and a failed Japanese pawnshop robbery involving bug spray and golf clubs. And just when you thought it couldn’t get wilder, Jade Davis rolled in, dragging his gravelly voice and PSA scripts, setting off an AI-voice cloning escapade that ended with Brad Barlow seducing East Idaho with a sultry ElevenLabs-generated whisper: “Hey babe, you don’t need to be strong for anyone right now…”

Viktor capped it off with cursed dolls, 1,000-foot tsunamis, social media comment-section warfare, haunted plantation weddings, and traumatized toddlers haunted by John Wilkes Booth. And in the end? A reminder to be safe during the 100 deadliest days on Idaho roads and to come help clean graves with Peaches on Memorial Day. This episode was unhinged brilliance. It was internet brain rot and small-town sincerity smashed together in a blender set to “apocalypse purée.”

(0:00) Internet predictions about the future
(7:37) Thomas Nelson of Rigby creates new hands-free dog leash
(11:01) The woes of my life yesterday evening
(17:37) Don't eat cucumbers or accidentally inhale chicken poo
(20:27) TV anchor's water breaks on air and she continues the show, lizard saves man's life, pawn shop robbers get a beatdown
(25:25) Cascadia Subduction Zone mega-thrust earthquake with some tin-foil hat action
(29:57) Memorial Day weekend approaching, we will be out cleaning cemeteries in June
(32:52) Family takes 3 year-old daughter to the Ford's Theater Museum and she leaves with a fear of John Wilkes Booth
(35:36) Chatting with Jade about road safety, voice work, and gruesome advertising
(41:23) Chatting with Peaches and Maddie about braces, piercings, and how to use Eleven Labs
(46:47) Playing around with Brad Barlow's voice in Eleven Labs
(50:12) The Annabelle doll visits Louisiana and chaos erupts

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Buckle up, because this episode of The Viktor Wilt Show was a full-blown emotional rollercoaster powered by spiteful grandmas, cranky Reddit nerds, and the eternal pain of unfinished hobbies. We kicked things off with a Lego-fueled family feud—some poor engineer poured months of blood, sweat, and bricks into building the Millennium Falcon with his son, only for his judgmental mother-in-law to quietly demolish it in the dead of night. Why? So he could “be a real man.” That’s right, folks, she went full Sith Lord on a plastic spaceship in the name of outdated gender roles. Naturally, Viktor went off on one, weighing the emotional trauma of a Lego massacre against the fact that, hey, it’s still technically rebuildable. Cue existential questions about manhood, parenting, and Humpty Dumpty.

Then it got deeply meta: Peaches, co-host and interviewer, stirred up a digital hornet’s nest by posting a seemingly harmless Seether interview to Reddit. Seether fans? Absolutely lost it because Peaches dared to have a chill, human conversation instead of grilling the guy about box sets and setlists like a court deposition. These fans handed in their fan cards and picked up pitchforks, officially earning themselves the title of Worst Online Rock Fanbase (a crown they now wear with shameful pride).

Meanwhile, Viktor navigated a thought spiral on motivation (or the crushing lack thereof), getting stuck in the Groundhog Day loop of Red Dead, cat mischief, and the unbearable lightness of weekday evenings. His lawn is a jungle. His hobbies are dust-covered. His YouTube addiction is real. But hope glimmered in the form of upcoming A24 movies and the dream of going to the theater again—if Idaho Falls lets him.

In between all that? Rattlesnakes in Arizona bathrooms, the horror of fake summer reading lists written by hallucinating AI, and the long-lost dream of the Internet making society smarter (spoiler: it didn’t). Add in an impromptu rant about snowmobile maniacs mowing down wildlife in Wyoming—because apparently that’s a thing—and you’ve got one of the most unhinged yet beautifully chaotic episodes yet.

And that’s before the tacos and the mail truck DUI.

(0:00) Mother-In-Law smashes man's Lego Millenium Falcon and he doesn't want her to come over anymore
(5:48) New A24 movie coming Friday called Friendship, A24 membership benefits
(10:16) How to enjoy weekdays/workdays. Life is like Groundhog's Day to me.
(15:31) More talk about hobbies, motivation, and a list of books that don't exist
(20:50) The Memorial Day Cemetery Cleanup with Teton Auto Credit
(22:41) Man smashes Del Taco Drive-Thru window, another sinkhole in Butte, Wyoming loves running animals over with snowmobiles
(28:28) Why money and power affects male self-esteem
(34:18) Nightmare house for sale in Arizona, but it might be the place to be if the zombies take over
(37:58) Billy Strings to appear on a new track from legendary metal band Cryptopsy
(41:52) Peaches upset Seether fans on Reddit by doing a proper interview with the band
(44:44) Florida postal worker stops at house party then continues the workday hammered
(47:51) Discussing the Seether subreddit and how to do an interview with Peaches
(1:02:16) Man throws tantrum at sober party over lack of tequila in the margaritas

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On this wildly unpredictable episode of The Viktor Wilt Show, chaos reigned supreme as Viktor dove headfirst into a buffet of absurdity and small-town drama. First, we were hit with a tale of a kindergartner casually rolling into school with a backpack full of Jell-O shots, mistaking them for snack-sized treats—a mistake that led to school-wide panic, hospital visits, and one very awkward PTA meeting. Then it was off to Texas, where a man with an onion allergy decided to sue Whataburger for close to a million bucks because his no-onion burger came with extra consequences—and possibly a side of EpiPen.

Viktor threw shade on the flying car revolution, arguing that society has barely earned the right to operate a bicycle, let alone pilot a $1M airborne deathtrap with the elegance of a brick with wings. He explored the nudist underbelly of America with news of the Buck Creek Streak 5K, a fully naked race through South Carolina, and casually admitted to singing naked Pantera karaoke wearing only a cowboy hat—because of course he did.

The show also featured tales of drunken naked attorneys shouting that they're Superman, gators trying to door-dash themselves into Florida homes, monster strawberries too large for human consumption, and HOA battles over planting native flowers instead of bowing to the sacred Lawn Cult. Viktor declared war on grass, called out boomer rage over graffiti, and plotted the return of a 60-foot elk statue to make Butte, Montana weird again.

There was philosophical musing about Idaho Falls’ questionable status as an “artsy city,” speculation on why he can’t muster the strength to mow his jungle of a backyard, and a warning to avoid airports unless you enjoy catching exotic diseases like airport measles. Oh, and somewhere in there, Jade’s microphone exploded, Peaches was almost blamed for gang tagging, and Victor contemplated quitting everything to run naked in South Carolina. A true masterpiece of manic local radio.

(0:00) Kindergartner brings Jello shots for the entire class
(2:45) Man sues Whataburger over onions on his burger
(5:35) Crazy Jay showed up at my house, gator goes door to door in Florida
(7:52) Naked 5K Run in South Carolina
(11:21) Memorial Day weekend
(13:17) Monster strawberries
(15:00) Naked attorney arrested screaming in the street, naked karaoke, army base bans bad language
(21:00) Post-Memorial Day cemetery clean up
(24:02) Flying cars are supposedly coming, but I doubt it
(26:33) Butte, Montana used to have a 60 foot elk sculpture over the road
(29:09) New rides and a saloon coming to Lagoon
(32:46) Chatting with Peaches about his height, sculptures, and artsy cities
(41:06) Weekend recap, upcoming concerts
(45:49) Guy with measles hanging out at the Newark airport
(48:17) HOA is not a fan of native plants

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Oh man—strap in, because this episode was a full-blown sensory overload, a headbanging, brain-scrambling rollercoaster that only Viktor Wilt could conduct. We kick things off with a taste-test of new metal—not nu-metal, mind you—specifically the latest Lorna Shore track "Oblivion," which delivers a skull-caving assault of sonic chaos that didn’t quite melt Viktor’s face off, but certainly singed the eyebrows. That segues into a dissection of the new Sleep Token album, which Viktor, a self-professed mega-fan, describes as “good, but kinda meh,” sparking existential speculation on whether Vessel is battling fame, burnout, or the temptation to drop overpriced European tour merch disguised as divine revelation.

From there, Viktor swan-dives into the hellscape of modern advertising, where Spotify pumps premium users full of ads and Netflix plans to shatter reality with AI-generated interactive commercials, because apparently the one thing our dystopia needed was more targeted marketing in the middle of our content. And speaking of injustices, how about the Rock & Roll Hall of Fame still snubbing Weird Al? Viktor’s ready to riot—with accordion in hand. Meanwhile, the Nottoway Plantation burns down and somehow people are sad they can’t book weddings there anymore (??), prompting a solid "really, America?" moment.

Things get even weirder with the announcement of a new Final Destination movie that supposedly reignites the franchise by, quote, "setting the playbook on fire and dancing on its ashes." Viktor's amped. He’s also spiraling with Rockstar Games rumors, clinging to the hope that GTA VI won’t ruin his fragile optimism—though let’s be honest, he’s going to play Red Dead 2 for the 800th time anyway.

But just when you think things can’t go further off the rails, Viktor shifts into “freak news” mode: a Popeyes manager literally shoots a coworker over burnt biscuits (yes, in the groin—humanity is doomed), an Instagram influencer claims she can’t fly economy because she’s too hot (cue eye roll), and airline control towers across America are basically ghosting pilots mid-flight. No big deal.

By the time we get to broken heart syndrome killing off more men than women (because dudes never go to therapy), Viktor’s vibing in a full existential spiral wrapped in sparkling water cans, Sleep Token debates, and unsolicited dating advice from Reddit. Toss in an unsolicited branding iron from a country music label, and a brief rant about Andrew Tate, and you’ve got yourself an episode that’s chaotic, cathartic, and weirdly comforting.

Needless to say, this was not a normal show. But then again—was it ever?

(0:00) Sleep Token is teasing something, I predict that it is simply more tour dates
(5:33) Netflix to add even more ads for their users in 2026
(9:44) Discussing the Rock And Roll Hall Of Fame and Weird Al Yankovic
(13:28) Nottoway Plantation in Louisiana burns to the ground
(17:20) Final Destination: Bloodlines looks like it is going to be awesome
(20:01) Grand Theft Auto 6 and Red Dead Redemption 2 rumors
(24:27) Popeyes manager shoots employee over burnt biscuits, hot woman has to fly first class, men die from broken hearts
(30:43) Chatting with Peaches about Sleep Token rumors and my thoughts on their new album
(42:49) Things that men say they don't like women to do
(48:06) I got send a branding iron from a country music artist

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Buckle up because this episode of Traffic School was a high-speed collision between stand-up comedy, a legal clinic, and a fever dream fueled by sparkling water and leftover Twinkies. It all kicked off with fantasies about shoving Peaches and Jade into the back of a police cruiser like human Tetris, only to spiral straight into a rant about getting lured by snacks into cop cars. From there, things escalated rapidly—Viktor’s party plans included the farmer’s market, a "classy prom" he’s too trashy for, and a Seether concert that somehow made seem like a religious experience. Meanwhile, Lieutenant Crain got dragged into defending his musical taste while also trying not to give heart attacks to elderly patients at the Saint Anthony Rehab Center with his playlist of motivational bangers.

Listeners called in with real (and really absurd) questions—like whether flashing cleavage can get you out of a speeding ticket (spoiler: it can’t), and whether riding in the bed of a truck with your toddler is legal (technically, maybe, but come on, man). Things got wild with tales of roadside bribery, moob-shaming, and a whole tangent about truck nuts. There were debates about highway merging etiquette, high-beam diplomacy, and what exactly constitutes a “clothing malfunction” in front of a traffic cop. Donna from ITD showed up like a boss, full of justified road rage and ready to burn phones of distracted drivers with electromagnetic vengeance. Viktor spiraled about government priorities while threatening to give out Jade’s email if he ever gets fired, and Crain tried to keep the chaos in check with the patience of a saint being pelted with traffic cones.

By the end, there was talk of microchipping drivers, electrocuting people for bad behavior, and inviting the governor on the show just to argue about boobs on guitars and library censorship. If the Department of Transportation tuned in, they probably needed a drink. All in all, it was a full-throttle, no-brakes ride through rural chaos, legal loopholes, and whatever the opposite of “public service announcement” is.

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Buckle up, because this episode of The Viktor Wilt Show went completely off the rails in the best way possible. Viktor started things off with a buffet of cursed "fun facts"—we’re talking about how mummy corpses were pulverized into brown paint (yes, actual human remains smeared on canvas), and how Walt Disney might’ve thrown hands in a parking lot over Goofy (citation very much needed). Then things took a hard left into science fiction horror when he revealed cordyceps fungus doesn’t hijack the brains of insects—it puppeteers their muscles while they stay consciously trapped in their own bodies. Hope you weren’t planning on sleeping tonight.

From there, the vibe whipped into wholesome chaos: Capri Suns, glittery nail polish, and sliding down playground slides as a grown adult all got shoutouts in Viktor’s personal manifesto of “things I’m doing forever no matter how old I get.” But just when you thought we were in cozy nostalgia territory, BAM—we're talking about a cemetery worker who literally dug up a grave to steal a ring. Viktor’s PSA? Plasma donation > grave robbing. Sound advice.

Then came the parade of humanity's lowest IQ moments: a woman demanding history books about real elves (because her family is tall), another allergic to electricity (while standing next to a power station), and someone mistaking credit cards for free money. Top it off with tourists getting outsmarted by bears and you’ve got a full-course meal of secondhand embarrassment.

The madness kept rolling with a burrito-triggered road rage incident that ended in vehicular assault. And in case that wasn’t weird enough, an intruder in Echo Park broke in, trashed the house, clogged the toilet, and just went to bed. Disgusting.

Then Viktor threw in local voting reminders like a flaming curveball: if you’re angry about politics, maybe don’t wait until they try to ban truck nuts before paying attention. He ranted about public lands being sold off in Utah and Nevada, and warned Idaho could be next. So vote. Seriously. Do it.

Finally, things crescendoed into vacation drama. Would you sleep on a hide-a-bed in a packed rental with 12 family members? Viktor and Peaches say absolutely not—give us a tent, a futon, or just leave us at home. Also, somebody named their baby after a fungal infection (Malassezia). You can’t make this up.

(0:00) Fun facts that nobody asked for
(4:13) All of the places you can find us this weekend
(6:41) Things you'll never stop doing no matter how old you are
(10:50) Man digs up grave over a gold ring
(12:44) People really are THIS stupid
(17:22) Road rage burrito incident, open containers legalized in Santa Monica, HBO Max is back
(21:37) Weather, man breaks into house and sleeps in owners bed
(23:55) Local elections next week, public land sales
(27:54) Naming your child after a fungal infection
(30:51) Vacationing with your family might suck

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