Humorous Horror

Out of work for months, Lussi Meyer is desperate to work anywhere in publishing. Prestigious Blackwood-Patterson isn’t the perfect fit, but a bizarre set of circumstances leads to her hire and a firm mandate: Lussi must find the next horror superstar to compete with Stephen King, Anne Rice, and Peter Straub. It’s the ’80s, after all, and horror is the hottest genre. But as soon as she arrives, Lussi finds herself the target of her coworkers’ mean-spirited pranks.

Verily, the story Biff has to tell is a miraculous one, filled with remarkable journeys, magic, healings, kung fu, corpse reanimations, demons, and hot babes. Even the considerable wiles and devotion of the Savior's pal may not be enough to divert Joshua from his tragic destiny. But there's no one who loves Josh more (except maybe "Maggie," Mary of Magdalan) and Biff isn't about to let his extraordinary pal suffer and ascend without a fight.

A fun, fast, fantastical listen: After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In fact, my first assignment is to discover who murdered my predecessor.

STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?

Book one of the fantasy horror trilogy, with lashings of British humour. Philip awakes, naked and chained to the floor by wrist and ankle, in the ramshackle dwelling of a family of murderous inbreds. His only hope of rescue lies with Matilda, their hideously deformed and needy daughter, who lurks in the shadows in her bloodied wedding dress. But what will she require of him in return? Matilda has lived in the darkness all her life. Finally, an Outsider has appeared, a man who - with a little good-natured prodding - can save her from her brutal father and show her what life is like outside ...

Our heroes are dressed in homemade uniforms and armed with prop phasers but soon find themselves defending their hotel and convention center against hordes of flesh-eating undead. Suddenly, all of their useless knowledge about particle physics and old Star Trek episodes has genuine real-world applications! And while hotel employees and regular civilians are dying left and right, our Trekkies summon strength and courage by emulating their favorite starship-voyaging characters

Warning: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. This is not a metaphor. You will dismiss this as ridiculous fearmongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fearmongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection - the creature secretes a chemical into the brain to stimulate skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That’s just as well, since the “cure” involves learning what a chain saw tastes like. You can’t feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings.

For as long as she can remember, Belle has been insidiously obsessed with her skin and skincare videos. When her estranged mother Noelle mysteriously dies, Belle finds herself back in Southern California, dealing with her mother’s considerable debts and grappling with lingering questions about her death. The stakes escalate when a strange woman in red appears at the funeral, offering a tantalizing clue about her mother’s demise, followed by a cryptic video about a transformative spa experience.

Seth Grahame-Smith delivers the definitive, essential guide to making it through a horror movie in one piece. As hilarious as it is useful (if you’re trapped in a scary flick, that is), How to Survive a Horror Movie covers all the bases. Trapped in a haunted house? Check. Stalked by an evil doll? Check. Wandering aimlessly through the remains of the old world as a plague of zombies sweeps over the planet? Check.

It is twelve years since the Great Reconfiguration and life in the continent-spanning network of Smart Houses is safe, sedentary, and sedated. Karl, Sam, and their children navigate this reality through implants and mood-balancing stims, living as much in the digital as the physical realm. However, when a tiny, impossible kitten enters their lives – unregistered, unthinkable, and utterly forbidden - a sequence of events is set in motion that will shatter their carefully constructed, user friendly world. As their home twists and turns against them, comfort becomes confinement, security ...

ALL FOUR BOOKS OF THE CTHULHU INCIDENT! EXCITEMENT, MYSTERY, ADVENTURE AND TERROR WILL GRAB YOU AND NOT LET GO, AS THE HEROIC TEAM OF G1, THE BUREAU OF EXTRAORDINARY AFFAIRS, PURSUE A CULT LEADER UNLEASHING THE HORDES OF HELL ON LONDON AND THE WORLD. WILL EVEN THE CANNY ABILITIES OF G1 BE ENOUGH TO STOP THE MONSTERS AND THE LEADER WHO SUMMONED THEM FROM CREATING HELL ON EARTH? Buy now.

At any given moment, the human body contains millions of parasites. This is the story of just one. A really, really nasty one. Benjamin Wilson was having a lousy month even before the stomach pains began. He was about to turn 40. One of his students had been shot while on a homicidal meat cleaver rampage. And, shortly after the funeral, Benjamin didn't feel so good.... Now, everything is changing. His body is being affected in some very unpleasant ways.

This eclectic short story collection of dark stories is set both in modern times and in fictional locales. These tales are tinged with themes of revenge served cold as found in Snake In The Shadows, The Unpleasant Demise of Simon Stone and Day of Atonement. Threads of dark humor from A Vampire For Some Seasons offer some comic respite. Within the core of all these stories, lie more questions than answers about the depravity of the human condition, all of which should be addressed in the cool safety of the light of day.

There’s a voodoo woman in New Orleans who knows your darkest secrets French Quarter paranormal investigator Wyatt Thomas learns he’s permanently linked to the spirit of a man with whom he’d fought a duel during another lifetime. The only person who can free Wyatt from his curse is long-dead voodoo queen Marie Laveaux. To seek her help, he must travel back to Antebellum New Orleans, succeed in his endeavor, or be trapped in the past forever. When Wyatt meets his former lover at the Mulatto Ball, he doesn’t know if he wants to return. While Wyatt is time traveling, detective Tony ...

Patrick Bateman moves among the young and trendy in 1980s Manhattan. Young, handsome, and well educated, Bateman earns his fortune on Wall Street by day while spending his nights in ways we cannot begin to fathom. Expressing his true self through torture and murder, Bateman prefigures an apocalyptic horror that no society could bear to confront.

Busy with troubles of her own, Maud the village witch just wants to be left alone. Peace and quiet should be easy enough when you're dead, right? Wrong. Reborn as a powerful lich, Maud is suddenly faced with the attentions of all the righteous heroes, holy clerics, and nosy neighbors of the realm. Now, instead of whiling away the days in her garden with her cat and her knitting, Maud must figure out how much force is required to crush a man's spine, the proper storage solution to keep a spoiling cadaver, and how best to display the remains of the fallen for maximum scare.

Gabriel Delling might call himself a professional con artist, but when walking superstitions start trying to bite his face off, his charm is shockingly unhelpful. It turns out living nightmares almost never appreciate a good joke. Together with a succubus who insists on constantly saving his life, Gabe desperately tries to survive a new reality that suddenly features demons, legends, and a giant locust named Dale - all of whom pretty much hate his guts. And when an ancient horror comes hunting for a spirit locked in his head, Gabe finds himself faced with the excruciating choice between death...or becoming some kind of freaking hero.

This bundle includes the first four novels in the Strangely Scary Funny Series. It follows the adventures of the librarian of Eden. One of his duties as librarian, in addition to checking out books, is protecting the town and its supernatural population. This includes dealing with a variety of witches, demons, angels, a hellhound, a monster or two, occasional god, and an assortment visitors from the nearby haunted forest. Don’t miss out on the series that readers are calling “hilarious,” “enthralling,” and “a refreshing original story.” Listen Now.

Bubba and Uncle Father Joe head to the happiest place in the world to find out what's messing up Joe's ex-girlfriend's career making a museum exhibition of monster and demon summoning apparatus. Yeah - haunted magical objects from all over the world, all stuck in the same place. What could go wrong? Turns out the answer is plenty, and Bubba is going to need all the help he can get to survive this one.

-Extraordinary encounters. Unexpected humor. Endless challenges. Life-threatening diseases. Unthinkable trauma.- Welcome to STAT: Crazy Medical Stories as told by the healthcare professionals themselves. From peculiar conditions and mysterious ailments to remarkable recoveries and perplexing medical mysteries, Stat: Crazy Medical Stories, draws from real-life accounts. Each chapter unveils crazy medical cases as narrated by the healthcare professionals themselves. The stories take you on a captivating journey across various disciplines, including general medicine, surgery, psychiatry, and ...