Humorous Horror

Strand's perpetually unlucky character Andrew Mayhem sets off on a simple mission at the request of his wife: Get some spaghetti sauce. On his way to the store he meets Konrath's obnoxious private eye Harry McGlade, co-star of the Lt. Jack Daniels thrillers. Horrific violence, bad jokes, and lots of name calling soon ensues. Some sex, too, but not between the main characters.

Felix as far as he can remember has never been anything else than a humorous talking skeleton. He's been living with Alicia Whiimblebright, a thirty-ish-year-old witch of Cuban descent, and Augustus a banished reaper. Life is good for Felix until he asks Alicia to place him in her store, Patchouli Mystical Tesoros Shop. He figured since he only comes to life at night, no one will see him watching the residents of Wisterious Bay. Against her better judgment, Alicia agrees to let Felix stand by the window of her shop for a week. Little does she know that a lot can happen in a week. A few days...

Busy with troubles of her own, Maud the village witch just wants to be left alone. Peace and quiet should be easy enough when you're dead, right? Wrong. Reborn as a powerful lich, Maud is suddenly faced with the attentions of all the righteous heroes, holy clerics, and nosy neighbors of the realm. Now, instead of whiling away the days in her garden with her cat and her knitting, Maud must figure out how much force is required to crush a man's spine, the proper storage solution to keep a spoiling cadaver, and how best to display the remains of the fallen for maximum scare.

According to The Nice and Accurate Prophecies of Agnes Nutter, Witch (the world's only completely accurate book of prophecies, written in 1655, before she exploded), the world will end on a Saturday. Next Saturday, in fact. Just before dinner. So the armies of Good and Evil are amassing, Atlantis is rising, frogs are falling, tempers are flaring. Everything appears to be going according to Divine Plan.

Warning: You may have a huge, invisible spider living in your skull. This is not a metaphor. You will dismiss this as ridiculous fearmongering. Dismissing things as ridiculous fearmongering is, in fact, the first symptom of parasitic spider infection - the creature secretes a chemical into the brain to stimulate skepticism, in order to prevent you from seeking a cure. That’s just as well, since the “cure” involves learning what a chain saw tastes like. You can’t feel the spider, because it controls your nerve endings.

STOP. You should not have touched this flyer with your bare hands. NO, don't put it down. It's too late. They're watching you. My name is David Wong. My best friend is John. Those names are fake. You might want to change yours. You may not want to know about the things you'll read on these pages, about the sauce, about Korrok, about the invasion, and the future. But it's too late. You touched the book. You're in the game. You're under the eye. The only defense is knowledge. You need to read this book, to the end. Even the part with the bratwurst. Why?

All Essie ever wanted was to have a normal life but in the end she found herself drawn back to Beldam House because she just can’t stop her witchiness. Into this coven of chaos stumbles gorgeous, clueless Josh, their new landlord—and he’s just discovered his tenants haven’t paid rent since the 1700s! As Josh is drawn further into the lives of the inhabitants of Beldam House, Essie is determined to keep him at broomstick’s length. That is, until a family secret, lying hidden for centuries, puts Josh firmly under her spell.

Out of work for months, Lussi Meyer is desperate to work anywhere in publishing. Prestigious Blackwood-Patterson isn’t the perfect fit, but a bizarre set of circumstances leads to her hire and a firm mandate: Lussi must find the next horror superstar to compete with Stephen King, Anne Rice, and Peter Straub. It’s the ’80s, after all, and horror is the hottest genre. But as soon as she arrives, Lussi finds herself the target of her coworkers’ mean-spirited pranks.

Hot 6 Story Bundle! Be the First to Read the Bundle of Lakelyn Wilder & Jaden Fair Stories… Includes Lakelyn Wilder’s: Ganged At the Cabin Forced By Strangers ~ Book 1 Forced By Strangers ~ Book 2 Forced By Strangers ~ Book 3 Forced By Strangers ~ Book 4 Plus a Story By Jaden Fair: BIG Surprise for the Sitter 6 Stories Dripping With Delicious Suspense! Intimate explicit situations, backdoor, threesome, group, and more!

My name is Frank Moon, and my life is completely in the toilet. Most of my friends, along with a large portion of New York City, are dead following the arrival of a bizarre meteor. The otherworldly phenomena brought with it a sickness—a disease—the likes of which this planet has never seen. A nightmarish species of super predator was born that day, something I call the Unseen. But at least I still have Jill, though, it was close…really close. Now, my wife and I find ourselves back in our old stomping grounds of South Florida, hellbent on locating our parents. Sadly, our triumphant ...

Another Melt Your Eyeballs It’s So Hot Bundle! Be the First to Read Lakelyn Wilder’s Newest Stories! 5 Story Bundle Includes & Bonus: Satisfy Me Deeply First Threesome With My BFF & His Best Friend Going Deep My First Time Plus Two More Wicked Hot Taboo Stories and a Bonus Story: Cherry Popping the Brat!

A fun, fast, fantastical listen: After an altercation with a clown, I get lost in the woods and find a strange town. When the librarian of the town dies in front of me, I try on his ring. It fits. I’m declared the new librarian by the mayor and townspeople. I get to live in a houseful of books. But I soon learn the job involves more than just tomes and information. In fact, my first assignment is to discover who murdered my predecessor.

In the nation’s Capital, someone is re-enacting the murders from a series of grisly horror books, and all the evidence points towards the author as the perpetrator. The big problem with that? He died a year ago. In suspicious circumstances. There were rumours of murder, but no arrests followed the original investigation. Now the victims are those who were closest to him, and it looks like the author has come back from the dead to exact his revenge. Hired by the author’s wife, who fears she may be next, Amanda and Tempest head to London for a case that will challenge the premise on which...

A suspenseful-gripping fun bloody adventure for the demon hunter. Cadence goes to Montana to help Graves Hassin solve a string of murders in the small town of Whitefish. High school girls are being killed. Their eyes are missing, leaving black holes with shadows moving inside. With her shadow demons and a large, nameless demon, the pale-faced witch, Jenny, aimed to kill her uncle Cadence, the demon hunter. Graves will need to help Chief Grady Black and his new love interest Emma Quinn understand about the supernatural and the evil that’s coming for them. Cadence has to confront his niece ...

Alex Cole will do anything for money. Murder? Check. Assault? Check. Infanticide? Check. Sexual favors? Double-check. But after getting himself roped into something called Kuman Thong - including its roasted human fetuses - Cole is left fighting unfathomable phenomena beyond his comprehension and rather unexpectedly trying save the world. All for a lousy paycheck.

At any given moment, the human body contains millions of parasites. This is the story of just one. A really, really nasty one. Benjamin Wilson was having a lousy month even before the stomach pains began. He was about to turn 40. One of his students had been shot while on a homicidal meat cleaver rampage. And, shortly after the funeral, Benjamin didn't feel so good.... Now, everything is changing. His body is being affected in some very unpleasant ways.

-Extraordinary encounters. Unexpected humor. Endless challenges. Life-threatening diseases. Unthinkable trauma.- Welcome to STAT: Crazy Medical Stories as told by the healthcare professionals themselves. From peculiar conditions and mysterious ailments to remarkable recoveries and perplexing medical mysteries, Stat: Crazy Medical Stories, draws from real-life accounts. Each chapter unveils crazy medical cases as narrated by the healthcare professionals themselves. The stories take you on a captivating journey across various disciplines, including general medicine, surgery, psychiatry, and ...

It all started when Cadence was asked to listen to the dying old man’s stories at the peaceful desert retirement home. Slowly, Cadence realized each story was about him and a black skull a slave demon named Jarvis had given him centuries ago. The demons came for him one by one with each one appearing larger and more powerful and all of them wanted the black skull. Through the course of a hundred years, Cadence has to figure out why they were after the skull and what dark magic it possessed. In 1940, he asked the witch Meadow to hide the skull for him, so the demons could not take it. Now ...

‘Real women don’t wear chainmail miniskirts or leather pants to a fight. Steve doesn’t waste your time on sex, he gives you story, and there’s a whole ton of it in each and every book.’ Can you keep a secret? What if it is something really terrible? A quiet town in the American Midwest is about to be rocked to its core. As three young sisters come to terms with what they are – being a witch is a real problem in a churchgoing, God-fearing family - a new neighbour with a mysterious past hints at trouble to come. However, the scary woman stalking them could be the least of their ...

Grandpappy is on hospice. Charles is going mad. Vile happenings are abound. You, listener, are not prepared. This is your lesson in depravity. Warning! This is an extreme horror novella. Very few triggers are left unpulled.