How to Break Up with Your Friends
Finding Meaning, Connection, and Boundaries in Modern Friendships
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Narrated by:
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Erin Falconer
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By:
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Erin Falconer
About this listen
Create space for meaningful connections and set healthy boundaries with this much-needed guide to modern-day friendship.
Friends hold an especially valuable role for women — few relationships have such power to fuel us and inspire our joy. Yet even though we pride ourselves on our large networks, we tend to be afraid of rocking the boat and asking for what we really need. As a result, we end up accepting mediocrity in ourselves and our friendships far too often.
But does it really have to be this way?
In How to Break Up with Your Friends, celebrated life mentor Erin Falconer provides a refreshing guide to modern-day friendships — along with deeper principles, assessments, and practices for nurturing them.
“This book is about so much more than going through your contact list with a machete,” Erin shares. “Yes, you’ll learn how to detox yourself from friendships that no longer nourish you, but you’ll also explore the astounding importance of modern friendships and how to be a truly great friend yourself.”
With clear-eyed guidance and a good dose of humor, Erin will help you:
- Take stock of those currently in your life so you can see exactly how you and your friends are serving each other.
- Understand how your earliest friendships impact your current relationships.
- Explore the importance of having healthy friendships — including the many ways we’re influenced by our friend groups.
- Know the main types of friendships we form, the roles they play in our lives, and how to deepen the most essential ones.
- Recognize the signs you’re in a toxic friendship and stop fearing constructive confrontation.
- Rupture and repair — be ready when a valuable friendship hits the rocks.
- Learn how to make new friends as an adult.
- Have the courageous conversations needed when it’s time to “break up” with others.
With a wealth of revelations and tools — including the Six Pillars of Friendship, the Friendship Diagnosis, and sample scripts to help facilitate the hard conversations — How to Break Up with Your Friends is the relationship audiobook you didn’t know you needed.
©2022 Erin Falconer (P)2022 Sounds TrueListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“Don’t let the title fool you — this is a book about connection, empathy, and finding nourishment through friendship. How to Break Up with Your Friends is an essential guide to creating space for these important relationships in our busy lives.” (Ximena Vengoechea, author of Listen Like You Mean It)
“If you’ve ever been in a situation where ending a friendship felt as painful as a divorce, read this book now. How to Break Up with Your Friends is a manifesto for genuine friendship. Erin sheds light on the qualities of forming deeper connections, prioritizing our well-being, and setting boundaries within our existing relationships, and, ultimately, how to have the courageous conversations needed when it’s time to ‘break up.’” (Justin Michael Williams, author of Stay Woke: A Meditation Guide for the Rest of Us)
“How to Break Up with Your Friends shows the innate power of one of the most underappreciated relationships — our friendships — and gives a crystal clear map of exactly how to unlock that power.” (Melissa Ambrosini, best-selling author of Comparisonitis and host of The Melissa Ambrosini Show podcast)
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- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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He's Just Not Your Type (And That's a Good Thing)
- How to Find Love Where You Least Expect It
- By: Andrea Syrtash
- Narrated by: Andrea Syrtash
- Length: 5 hrs and 2 mins
- Unabridged
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A relationship expert and dating columnist shares her counterintuitive approach to lasting love: encouraging women to date their "non-types". After years of dating, many women fall into relationship ruts. As serial daters, they are attracted to the same type of man time and again. Clearly something's not working. But the problem is not that he's just not that into them - the reality is he's just not their type.
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Amazing Insight
- By Maria M on 02-10-19
By: Andrea Syrtash
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When Friendship Hurts
- How to Deal with Friends Who Betray, Abandon, or Wound You
- By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tanya Eby
- Length: 7 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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We’ve all had friendships that have gone bad. Whether it takes the form of a simple yet inexplicable estrangement or a devastating betrayal, a failed friendship can make your life miserable, threaten your success at work or school, and even undermine your romantic relationships. Finally there is help. In When Friendship Hurts, Jan Yager, recognized internationally as a leading expert on friendship, explores what causes friendships to falter and explains how to mend them - or end them.
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Boring and patronizing
- By KDS on 11-17-22
By: Jan Yager Ph.D.
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Belong
- Find Your People, Create Community & Live a More Connected Life
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- Narrated by: Radha Agrawal
- Length: 3 hrs and 27 mins
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It’s the great paradox of the digital age, what Radha Agrawal calls “community confusion” - the internet connects us to hundreds, thousands, even millions of people, and yet we feel more isolated than ever, with one in four Americans saying they have zero friends to confide in. Where are our people? The answer is found in Belong, a highly energetic guide to discovering where and with whom you fit.
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Short and simple explanation for something difficult.
- By Marina E Kirkland on 12-02-19
By: Radha Agrawal
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The Undervalued Self
- By: Elaine N. Aron
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Salon Finished Dawn on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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The Kindness Challenge
- Thirty Days to Improve Any Relationship
- By: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Narrated by: Shaunti Feldhahn
- Length: 4 hrs and 51 mins
- Unabridged
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Shaunti Feldhahn helps listeners transform any relationship by making three small changes! In a new approach for Shaunti, this book is a cross between a major research study, a self-help book, and a daily step-by-step habit-building plan. It shows listeners how to apply the surprising relationship insights revealed in her earlier million-copy best sellers, why certain actions matter so much, and a specific 30-day plan on what to do to build a very simple habit that will change any relationship for the better.
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Challenge Accepted!
- By SoS1234 on 01-11-17
By: Shaunti Feldhahn
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I Want This to Work
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- By: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Narrated by: Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
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Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
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I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
- By Sunny Bettley on 03-17-23
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30 Lessons for Loving
- Advice from the Wisest Americans on Love, Relationships, and Marriage
- By: Karl Pillemer Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 8 hrs and 41 mins
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Based on the most detailed survey of long married people ever conducted, 30 Lessons for Loving shows the way to lifelong, fulfilling relationships. The author, an internationally renowned gerontologist at Cornell University, offers sage advice from the oldest and wisest Americans on everything from finding a partner, to deciding to commit, to growing old together.
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Our Elders Really are the Experts!
- By Cher Finnan on 12-29-15
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Happier Now
- By: Nataly Kogan
- Narrated by: Nataly Kogan
- Length: 6 hrs and 39 mins
- Unabridged
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What if you could be happier, right now, without radically changing your life? As nationally recognized happiness expert Nataly Kogan teaches, happiness is not a nice feeling or a frivolous extra. It’s a critical, non-negotiable ingredient for living a fulfilling, meaningful, and healthy life - and it's a skill that we can all learn and improve through practice. In Happier Now, Nataly shares an illuminating, inspiring, and science-based guide to help you build your happier skills and live with more joy, starting now.
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This book will turn your life around ... TODAY!
- By Joe Barnhill on 06-04-18
By: Nataly Kogan
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How to Be a Best Friend Forever
- Making and Keeping Lifetime Relationships
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Our world has diluted the meaning of friendship, but the reality is, there’s nothing like the sustaining strength of true-blue, forever friends. Still, many people are convinced that they’ll never find such lifelong connections—or that they don’t need them. In this encouraging audio book, best-selling author and psychologist John Townsend delivers hope and help for making these relationships a reality—and for making them even better if you’ve already got a “bestie.”
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This is a Christian based book.
- By lisak227 on 11-17-14
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30 Lessons for Living
- Tried and True Advice from the Wisest Americans
- By: Karl Pillemer Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Sean Pratt
- Length: 8 hrs and 13 mins
- Unabridged
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More than 1,000 extraordinary Americans share their stories and the wisdom they have gained on living, loving, and finding happiness. After a chance encounter with an extraordinary 90-year-old woman, renowned gerontologist Karl Pillemer began to wonder what older people know about life that the rest of us don't. His quest led him to interview more than one thousand Americans over the age of 65 to seek their counsel on all the big issues- children, marriage, money, career, aging.
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Solid advice, however memory may bias it
- By Glenn on 10-08-12
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
- Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Gary Galone
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You
- Seven Steps to Saving Your Relationship
- By: Andrew G. Marshall
- Narrated by: Andrew G. Marshall
- Length: 8 hrs and 18 mins
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In I Love You, but I'm Not in Love with You - a real-life relationship guide from couples' counselor Andrew G. Marshall - partners and individuals who have "fallen out of love" or want to rekindle the love that once was will learn how to use Marshall 's program with impressive results. This is a much-needed book to help men and women of all ages in any type of committed romantic relationship to truly understand love and to point out the everyday habits that undermine growing together.
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If you feel stuck in a relationship, this book is a MUST!
- By Christopher on 05-09-19
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Rethinking Narcissism
- The Bad - and Surprising Good - About Feeling Special
- By: Dr. Craig Malkin
- Narrated by: Kiff VandenHeuvel
- Length: 6 hrs and 6 mins
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In Rethinking Narcissism listeners will learn that there's far more to narcissism than its reductive invective would imply. The truth is that narcissists (all of us) fall on a spectrum somewhere between utter selflessness on the one side and arrogance and grandiosity on the other. A healthy middle exhibits a strong sense of self.
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Great info, but proceed with caution
- By Caterina M. Platt on 11-16-17
By: Dr. Craig Malkin
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What listeners say about How to Break Up with Your Friends
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- Viva Aloe
- 04-02-23
Healing
I have broke up with couple friends all in the sudden, after reading this book I learned I did the right thing for myself and my ex-friends. And won’t feel guilty about it anymore.
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- Angelica
- 11-29-22
An absolute must read for 20-something’s
As a 20-something year old this book resonated more than I can articulate. Erin is so honest, genuine, yet heartfelt in her advice and her prose. I cannot wait to read her next book. Thank you for all of the wisdom.
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- Anonymous User
- 06-21-22
Beautiful
Exactly what we all need! Thank you for doing the work so that we can benefit from it!
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- Tami Martin
- 04-18-22
Audio issues
The audio kept cutting, the same way it does when you get a text or notification somewhere else but without it.
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- Amazon Customer
- 07-19-22
Epic Validation
This book really hit home in so many ways. not only did it talk about examples that aligned with events I have experienced but it validated that my current journey to I prove myself is completely on the right track toward improving the quality of my relationships. It also helped me accept certain intuitions about needing to let some friends go who I have loved and valued in the past. It made me feel so lifted that my habit of collecting casual friendships is actually healthy and that it is ok for friends to fill certain needs and not all. I loved this one and really feel like all of my friends, of all types, should read this book!!
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- Marisol Draughon
- 07-10-22
Good, but woke.
There are some great lessons here! The author seems genuine however don’t love that she opts to show up in her book as a SJW. As a Latina woman, I found it extremely annoying that she kept referencing race and victimizing POC. I understand the sentiment, but it’s extremely flawed. Aside from that, I enjoyed the book.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Brooke
- 01-30-22
Loved this book
I truly loved this book and it resonated with me in so many different ways. It really made me think about my role in my friendships and take inventory of my friendshipsZ.
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- Bohica
- 01-25-24
interesting listen
Interesting listen and important in a post COVID world. Can't think of any friends to dump 😆 but excited to discuss this in an online book club! Important life lessons and reminders.
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- Natalie Goldberger
- 09-28-24
Good advice on friendship, but woke.
The race focus got really irritating,..comments on microagressions, racist society, victimized POC, etc.. I tried to ignore all the woke nonsense and listen to the friendship advice, which was helpful.
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- babette cilliers
- 12-28-22
So many truths
Thank you for the time you spent writing this book. I could relate to so much and appreciate how you dedicated the majority of it in working on ourselves before giving up on a friendship.
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1 person found this helpful