I Want This to Work
An Inclusive Guide to Navigating the Most Difficult Relationship Issues We Face in the Modern Age
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Narrated by:
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Elizabeth Earnshaw LMFT CGT
About this listen
“Elizabeth Earnshaw’s gentle guidance will help any type of couple, whether they are dealing with small day-to-day problems or long-standing conflicts. She takes an accessible approach to couples therapy on the page, making these relationship tools feel easy - and even fun.” (Lori Gottlieb, LMFT, New York Times best-selling author of Maybe You Should Talk to Someone)
A contemporary, culturally inclusive, and easy-to-digest relationship guide for the modern age
Today’s generation is changing the rules about committed relationships - and looking to create more meaning within their lives. We are more selective before getting married, with more diverse families and family structures, and we’ve seen a whopping 18 percent drop in divorce rates. In this new environment, what couples need more than ever are effective, flexible tools to communicate, navigate hard times, and create deeper connections with their partners.
Elizabeth Earnshaw is here to help. The renowned Gottman therapist, founder of A Better Life Therapy, and influential Instagram therapist behind @lizlistens has helped to transform countless relationships. With I Want This to Work, she presents for today’s generation the most effective and proven steps for relationship success.
“We’re in a cultural moment,” she says, “where people are hungry to absorb the principles for healthy relationships. This audiobook answers that call.”
Here, couples will learn how to work with the three challenges they must tackle to repair and strengthen their relationships: conflict, healing, and connection. They’ll learn fundamental principles including:
- Why it’s not working
- Creating space that makes it safe to connect
- How to navigate hot conversations
- The five-part relationship system
- Busting the romantic notion that our better half “completes” us
- Growing up and growing out - how both your early years and the social connections you make as an adult influence your relational beliefs, feelings, and patterns
In a supportive and relatable voice, Elizabeth simplifies complex concepts and provides core insights, exercises, and reflections to take these tested principles into real life.
Culturally tuned in, LGBTQIA+ friendly, and for both married and unmarried couples, this audiobook brings us an accessible guide to relationship healing and creating enduring intimacy.
©2021 Elizabeth Earnshaw, LMFT, CGT (P)2021 Sounds TrueListeners also enjoyed...
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Critic reviews
“This book is an essential guide for couples who desire to build vital relationship skills, particularly during challenging moments. The tools for growth and learning are written in a warm and no-nonsense manner. I Want This to Work can be used as a stand-alone resource or in tandem with therapy. The book will help couples gain a unique understanding of how to talk about and work through hard things.” (Nedra Tawwab, LCSW, therapist and New York Times best-selling author of Set Boundaries, Find Peace)
“Elizabeth is hands down one of the most professional clinicians I’ve had the privilege of working with. The work she does on relational health is incredibly impactful because it’s delivered in a way that’s both digestible and compassionate.” (Dr. Nicole LePera, New York Times best-selling author of How to Do the Work and founder of @the.holistic.psychologist)
“I Want This to Work does a beautiful job of exploring the many issues the modern-day couple faces, while normalizing the reader’s experience by offering examples of couples working through similar challenges. A necessary read for anyone wanting to improve the quality of their relationships.” (Vienna Pharaon, LMFT, owner of Mindful Marriage & Family Therapy, founder of @mindfulmft, and relationship expert at Motherly)
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- Unabridged
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If the Buddha Married is filled with the same highly practical, spiritually sound guidance that so clearly touched a chord with fans of If the Buddha Dated. Charlotte Kasl is renowned for her ability to speak with depth, wisdom, and humor on important matters of the heart. In If the Buddha Married, Kasl inspires us to create fulfilling and vibrant relationships through a commitment to awareness and truth.
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It's not about "PERFORMANCE".
- By chuck on 03-19-12
By: Charlotte Kasl
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Frientimacy
- How to Deepen Friendships for Lifelong Health and Happiness
- By: Shasta Nelson
- Narrated by: Robin Eller
- Length: 8 hrs and 31 mins
- Unabridged
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In Frientimacy, award-winning speaker Shasta Nelson shows how anyone can form stronger, more meaningful friendships, marked by a level of trust she calls "frientimacy". Shasta explores the most common complaints and conflicts facing female friendships today, and lays out strategies for overcoming these pitfalls to create deeper, supportive relationships that last for the long-term.
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I didn't finish it, but I still recommend it
- By Emily on 10-21-17
By: Shasta Nelson
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The Courage Habit
- How to Accept Your Fears, Release the Past, and Live Your Courageous Life
- By: Kate Swoboda, Bari Tessler MA
- Narrated by: Kate Marcin
- Length: 5 hrs and 27 mins
- Unabridged
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In The Courage Habit, certified life coach Kate Swoboda offers freedom from the outdated belief that one must be fearless in order to live courageously. Instead, she defines courage as a willingness to act on what we want in spite of our fears and offers an evidence-based program to help readers conquer their inner critic, overcome worries, increase resilience, work toward their highest aspirations, and make courage a habit every day.
By: Kate Swoboda, and others
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It
- By: Patricia Love, Steven Stosny
- Narrated by: Laural Merlington
- Length: 6 hrs and 49 mins
- Unabridged
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Men are right. The "relationship talk" does not help. Dr. Patricia Love’s and Dr. Steven Stosny’s How to Improve Your Marriage Without Talking About It reveals the stunning truth about marital happiness: Love is not about better communication. It's about connection.
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Must read if your on the verge of loosing it all!
- By Chris on 07-19-15
By: Patricia Love, and others
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The Happy Stepmother
- By: Rachelle Katz
- Narrated by: Gayle Hendrix
- Length: 8 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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You found the love of your life, and you vowed to have, to hold, and to stepmother. You always thought that in time you'd grow to be the perfect, loving family. So why does it seem that the harder you try, the more unappreciated you feel? As a stepmother, therapist, and founder of the popular stepsforstepmothers.com, Dr. Rachelle Katz knows all too well how challenging stepmotherhood can be. Based on thousands of in-depth interviews and the latest research, she's created a powerful program to help you.
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horrible
- By Marcia R on 02-07-17
By: Rachelle Katz
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The Journey of the Heroic Parent
- Your Child's Struggle & The Road Home
- By: Brad M. Reedy Ph.D.
- Narrated by: Tom Parks
- Length: 8 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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When a child is hurting, it can be the most painful challenge a parent will face. With compassion and perspective, Dr. Brad Reedy offers hope and wisdom for children who struggle and the parents who love them. The Journey of the Heroic Parent will take you on a journey to a happier, healthier relationship with your struggling child - and yourself. Through lessons learned, mother, father, and child will achieve greater understanding, love, and humanity - no matter what the outcome.
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Loved it! Will read over again and again!
- By wooplicity on 06-21-15
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The Undervalued Self
- By: Elaine N. Aron
- Narrated by: Marguerite Gavin
- Length: 7 hrs and 54 mins
- Unabridged
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Elaine Aron follows up her best sellers on the highly sensitive person with a groundbreaking new book on the undervalued self. She explains that self-esteem results from having a healthy balance of love and power in our lives. Readers will learn to incorporate love into situations that seem to require power and deal with power struggles that mask themselves as issues of love.
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Life Changing!
- By Salon Finished Dawn on 09-20-15
By: Elaine N. Aron
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The DNA of Relationships
- By: Dr. Gary Smalley
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 44 mins
- Unabridged
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We are designed for relationships, yet they often bring us pain. In this paradigm-shifting book, Gary Smalley unravels the DNA of relationships: we are made for three great relationships, with God, others, and ourselves, and all relationships involve choice. Gary exposes a destructive relationship dance that characterizes nearly every relationship conflict, and he offers five new dance steps that will revolutionize relationships.
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Could be half as long
- By Christine on 01-06-08
By: Dr. Gary Smalley
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The Emotional Edge
- Discover Your Inner Age, Ignite Your Hidden Strengths, and Reroute Misdirected Fear to Live Your Fullest
- By: Crystal Andrus Morissette
- Narrated by: Andi Arndt
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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The Emotional Edge is an exciting expansion of Crystal's successful brand - she has tackled weight management, confidence building, and spiritual growth; now she combines all that and more into her most powerful program yet. The Emotional Edge is a guide for letting go of the past and embracing a more empowered future. This audiobook is spiritual self-help designed to teach listeners how to overcome behavioral ruts and engage the world from a happier, more empowered place.
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the world needs more of this.
- By Amber Jessop on 11-25-17
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Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?
- Encouragement for Women Involved with Angry and Controlling Men
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Gary Galone
- Length: 11 hrs and 41 mins
- Unabridged
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Like a constant friend, this collection of meditations is a source of strength and reassurance designed to speak to women like you, women in relationships with angry and controlling men. It helps you to digest what is happening a piece at a time, so you can gain clarity, safety, and freedom.
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Just what I needed.
- By lori Goodson on 11-07-15
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Relationship Breakthrough
- How to Create Outstanding Relationships in Every Area of Your Life
- By: Cloe Madanes, Anthony Robbins
- Narrated by: Aimee Jolson
- Length: 6 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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Everyone faces the challenges of making relationships work. Whether with spouses, family members, friends, lovers, or colleagues, relationships have the power to make one feel happy, frustrated, or miserable. In Relationship Breakthrough, Cloe Madanes - an expert in creating healing, empowering relationships - gives listeners vital tools to transform their relationships and their lives. Madanes's cutting-edge methods produce real results and create rewarding, sustainable relationships.
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Disappointed
- By Dee on 01-10-16
By: Cloe Madanes, and others
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Differently Wired
- Raising an Exceptional Child in a Conventional World
- By: Deborah Reber
- Narrated by: Deborah Reber
- Length: 8 hrs and 19 mins
- Unabridged
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Today millions of kids are stuck in a world that doesn't respect, support, or embrace who they really are - these are what Deborah Reber is calling the “differently wired” kids, the one in five children with ADHD, dyslexia, Asperger’s, and other neurodifferences. Their challenges are many. But now there’s hope. Written by Deborah Reber, a best-selling author and mother in the midst of an eye-opening journey with her son who is twice exceptional (he has ADHD, Asperger’s, and is highly gifted), Differently Wired is a how-to, a manifesto, a book of wise advice, and more.
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very well thought out but not for everyone
- By Trudy Owens on 01-01-19
By: Deborah Reber
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Why Mars and Venus Collide
- Understanding How Men and Women Cope Differently with Stress
- By: John Gray
- Narrated by: John Gray
- Length: 6 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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Once upon a time, Martians and Venusians functioned in separate worlds. But in today's hectic and career-oriented environment, relationships have become a lot more complicated, and men and women are experiencing unprecedented levels of stress. To add to the increasing tension, most men and women are also completely unaware that they are actually hardwired to react differently to the stress.
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Very insightful & evokative for introspection
- By Amazon Customer on 02-04-12
By: John Gray
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misleading re: key information
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A very disenchanting book
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Losing the self
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Conflict is a natural part of any intimate relationship. Yet most couples either avoid it or try to smooth over their differences. This often results in at least one partner compromising their integrity—and stunting their own growth. Monsters in Love challenges the idea that conflict between partners is unhealthy or something to avoid. Instead, it encourages both people to stand by what they need and who they are—but to do so with compassion rather than competitiveness or vengefulness.
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Words to Feeling
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life changing.
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Life changing
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Is there a hidden part of you that no one else sees? Do you have a vivid inner world of thoughts and emotions that your peers and loved ones can't seem to access? Have you ever been told you're too quiet, shy, boring, or awkward? Are your habits and comfort zones questioned by a society that doesn't seem to get you? If so, you might be an introvert. On behalf of those who have long been misunderstood, rejected, or ignored, fellow introvert Jenn Granneman writes a compassionate vindication.
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Unnecessary voices
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We've all seen the happiness on the face of a child while playing in the school yard. Or the blissful abandon of a golden retriever racing across a lawn. This is the joy of play. By definition, play is purposeless, all-consuming, and fun. But as Dr. Stuart Brown illustrates, play is anything but trivial. It is a biological drive as integral to our health as sleep or nutrition. We are designed by nature to flourish through play.
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Ikigai is the place where our passion (what we love), mission (what we hope to contribute), vocation (the gifts we have to offer the world) and profession (how our passions and talents can become a livelihood) converge, giving us a personal sense of meaning. This book helps you bring together all of these elements so that you can enjoy a balanced life.
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very odd choices of example stories throughout
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About a third of the world population suffers from an anxiety disorder, and half of Americans have had at least one traumatic experience like rape, assault, shooting, or natural disasters. Fear and anxiety are with us everywhere we go. Fear is deeply woven into our biology, culture, politics, and day to day life. We sometimes don't even know what we are afraid of. What we know for sure is that we are afraid too often.But why are we so scared? How does fear work in our brains? What is the evolutionary purpose of fear? In this book, a psychiatrist and neuroscientist answers these questions.
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Wonderfully comprehensive, cogent, compelling, and fluent book on the topic
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The Anxiety Audit
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The Anxiety Audit is a guide for us all: with no overly scientific or diagnostic language—just real talk and time-tested tactics from a respected therapist—it is a relatable and practical guide to untangling yourself from the grips of worry and fear. Using stories, real-world examples, and helpful dialogues to retrain the way you think and react, trusted anxiety expert Lynn Lyons helps you recognize the sneaky ways these anxious patterns and cycles of worry take hold in your life.
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Very unimpressed
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The Untethered Soul Lecture Series Collection, Volumes 1-4
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Michael A. Singer’s spiritual classic The Untethered Soul: The Journey Beyond Yourself gave us a lucid and practical guide to living an awakened life. Now, for those inspired by his books or new to his teachings, The Untethered Soul Lecture Series Collection, Volumes 1-4 brings you into the company of this beloved teacher as he suffuses new illumination into the life-changing insights shared in his written works.
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One size doesn't fit all
- By Bill on 04-13-21
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How to Listen
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At a time when we are more technologically linked than ever, our conversations have never been more distracted and disconnected—because most don’t know how to truly listen. The result? You constantly fight to be “heard” over all the noise and distraction. In How to Listen, Oscar Trimboli, host of the Apple-award-winning podcast Deep Listening, shows you how to unlock your listening superpowers. Trimboli shares practical and pragmatic insights to help you notice when you aren’t listening—and what to do about it.
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A transformative journey
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What listeners say about I Want This to Work
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- gideon osei
- 10-17-22
Why isn't this mandatory?
This book and framework should be mandatory across the nation's high schools!!! I just can't believe in my forties how ill equipped we are to deal with relational issues and relationships. and I consider my 18 year marriage pretty dang good! This is by far one of the most important things we do in life and impacts every other area of our lives. I like her framework and the questions/activities. She gives very insightful exploration no matter what stage of a relationship one may be in. I believe it will help all relational interactions, not just the 'couples' type relationship.
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- Larry Leatherwood
- 06-20-22
Worthy read
Work on yourself first - then work on your relationships, and you will reap the benefits of this book. Highly recommend it to adults trying to find a companion, love, and a partnership without leaving themselves behind.
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- Amazon Customer
- 02-05-24
Solid advice on successful relationships
My girlfriend and I (over 70) enjoyed the book. We learned some good pointers on overcoming past obstacles that affected us today. Really appreciated the Scripts section of the Appendix.
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- jaymillwood
- 02-24-22
Spectacular information
The author presents SO many wonderful concepts. I loved the information from the different sources and modalities that she shared.
This is a book that ANY couple Could use as a workbook, unfortunately it doesn’t quite translate with as much impact in audible form.
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- Robert B. Davis
- 01-19-22
Excellent content bereft of pdf
Excellent content, passionate and engaging narration. Exercises and appendix should be provided in pdf format.
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- Mr. Business
- 07-02-23
Shifted my perspective on everything.
Incredible book and has shifted my mindset. So many powerful tools and knowledge to be gained.
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- Sunny Bettley
- 03-17-23
I want this to work too. Excellent information, excruciating execution
It is taking every ounce of my physical and emotional determination to continue to listen to this book for the wonderful information that it contains. Unfortunately, the narrator sounds as if she is learning to read for the first time. The cadence is strange, her stresses and inflections are random and incredibly distracting, significantly taking away from the important info she is sharing. This author should never be allowed to narrate another book again, unless she can learn how to talk to adults in a way that doesn’t make one feel like a developmentally stunted child. It’s concerning to imagine whether she speaks to her clients this way in real life.
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4 people found this helpful