The MisreadBible: Genesis
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Narrated by:
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Joshua Saxon
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By:
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J. R. Eldridge
About this listen
A collection of twisted Bible tales from the warped mind of J. R. Eldridge, brought to life by the mellifluous voice of Joshua Saxon.
Embark on a journey from the creation of the universe to the arrival of the Israelites in Egypt in this blasphemously funny retelling of the Book of Genesis.
A lonely deity creates the Earth in his mother’s basement and makes a little clay man who falls in love with his own rib. After the humans engage in some freaky angel sex, God decides to flood the entire world, saving only a drunkard called Noah and his family.
Once the humans have repopulated the Earth, God chooses one man called Abram, drags him from his home in the middle of the night, changes his name, and then tells him to kill his son, forming an everlasting covenant with him and his descendants.
Later, Jacob steals his brother’s birthmark, boinks his cousins, and comes up with an innovative way to breed sheep. He fathers a dozen kids including Joseph, whose brothers get tired of his dreams of grandeur and sell him to some shapeshifting Ishmaelites who take him to Egypt.
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African folktales come in many different types. Some are myths explaining the origins of things, while others are tales of heroes with supernatural abilities. Animal stories are many and varied, and they usually involve some kind of trickster who uses his wiles to get out of sticky situations and sometimes into them. There are also cautionary tales explaining why it is important to behave well and treat others with respect, while other stories have a style and shape similar to that of a fairy tale.
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The book itself is wonderful.
- By Kerry Romero on 05-20-20
By: Matt Clayton
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The Message/Remix
- The New Testament in Contemporary Language
- By: Eugene Peterson
- Narrated by: Contemporary Christian Music Artists
- Length: 19 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Why does a 2,000-year-old book still matter? Why should it? The answer is found in The Message: REMIX New Testament, today's Bible in contemporary language for tomorrow's leaders. The Message has had a profound impact on millions of people worldwide, including some of the best-known artists in contemporary Christian music today. The Message: REMIX is read by artists whose lives have been impacted by The Message.
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Cheesy but good.
- By Chris on 05-31-05
By: Eugene Peterson
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Gimpel the Fool and Other Stories
- By: Isaac Bashevis Singer
- Narrated by: Theodore Bikel
- Length: 2 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
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These 4 stories are infused with the wit and imagination, the humor and wisdom, that characterizes all of Isaac Bashevis Singer's work. Theodore Bikel reads these wise and funny tales in classic Yiddish storyteller cadence, injecting special warmth and resonance. The tales include "Gimpel the Fool," "Esther Kreindel the Second," "The Spinoza of Market Street," and "The Black Wedding."
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Incredible narration
- By Frances on 01-10-19
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Rebel Daughter
- By: Lori Banov Kaufmann
- Narrated by: Ellen Archer
- Length: 10 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
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A young woman survives the unthinkable in this stunning and emotionally satisfying tale of family, love, and resilience, set against the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 CE.
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Fantastic historical fiction!
- By Lisa C. Schneider on 02-28-21
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Farnham's Freehold
- By: Robert A. Heinlein
- Narrated by: Tom Weiner
- Length: 10 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
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Hugh Farnham is a practical, self-made man, and when he sees the clouds of nuclear war gathering, he builds a bomb shelter under his house, hoping for peace and preparing for war. But when the apocalypse comes, something happens that he did not expect. A thermonuclear blast tears apart the fabric of time and hurls his shelter into a world with no sign of other human beings.
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Heinlein of his time...
- By Lisa on 07-03-11
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Mesoamerican Mythology
- A Captivating Guide to Maya Mythology, Aztec Mythology, Inca Mythology, and Central American Myths
- By: Matt Clayton
- Narrated by: Randy Whitlow
- Length: 10 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
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If you're looking for a captivating collection of Inca myths, then pay attention.... This audiobook includes four captivating manuscripts: Maya Mythology, Aztec Mythology, Inca Mythology, and Central American Mythology.
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Horrible pronouncing of names
- By Time2C on 09-27-21
By: Matt Clayton
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Mythos
- By: Stephen Fry
- Narrated by: Stephen Fry
- Length: 15 hrs and 26 mins
- Unabridged
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Here are the thrills, grandeur, and unabashed fun of the Greek myths, stylishly retold by Stephen Fry. The legendary writer, actor, and comedian breathes life into ancient tales, from Pandora's box to Prometheus's fire, and transforms the adventures of Zeus and the Olympians into emotionally resonant and deeply funny stories, without losing any of their original wonder. Learned notes from the author offer rich cultural context. This volume is a doorway into a captivating world.
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Please, will you tell me a story?
- By L. Kampp on 09-24-19
By: Stephen Fry
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What Men Live By
- By: Leo Tolstoy
- Narrated by: Max Highstein
- Length: 1 hr
- Unabridged
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One winter evening a shoemaker finds a mysterious stranger naked and freezing by a shrine in his small village. The shoemaker rescues the man, and takes him home. Though the stranger won’t say where he came from, Simon invites him to work beside him, and stay with his family. As the story unfolds, the stranger transforms, and ultimately reveals an astonishing and deeply moving secret. Late in Tolstoy’s life, after he had written his great masterpieces War and Peace, and Anna Karenina, he underwent a spiritual transformation.
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Short but powerful story from Leo Tolstoy
- By Anonymous User on 09-19-21
By: Leo Tolstoy
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Monkey King
- Journey to the West
- By: Wu Cheng'en, Julia Lovell - translator - editor - introduction, Gene Luen Yang - foreword
- Narrated by: Robert Wu
- Length: 13 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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A shape-shifting trickster on a quest for eternal life, Monkey King is one of the most memorable superheroes in world literature. High-spirited and omni-talented, he amasses dazzling weapons and skills on his journey to immortality: a gold-hooped staff that can grow as tall as the sky and shrink to the size of a needle; the ability to travel 108,000 miles in a single somersault. A master of subterfuge, he can transform himself into whomever or whatever he chooses and turn each of his body's 84,000 hairs into an army of clones.
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Performance
- By Maedine on 02-28-21
By: Wu Cheng'en, and others
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The Seven or Eight Deaths of Stella Fortuna
- A Novel
- By: Juliet Grames
- Narrated by: Lisa Flanagan
- Length: 16 hrs and 57 mins
- Unabridged
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For Stella Fortuna, death has always been a part of life. Stella’s childhood is full of strange, life-threatening incidents - moments where ordinary situations like cooking eggplant or feeding the pigs inexplicably take lethal turns. Even Stella’s own mother is convinced that her daughter is cursed or haunted. When the Fortunas emigrate to America on the cusp of World War II, Stella and her sister, Tina, must come of age side by side in a hostile new world with strict expectations for each of them.
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Misogyny at its worst
- By brenda on 01-15-20
By: Juliet Grames
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Goddess Power
- 10 Empowering Tales of Legendary Women
- By: Yung In Chae
- Narrated by: Holly Palance
- Length: 2 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
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The goddesses of classical mythology ruled the heavens, mingled with mortals, and overcame tremendous odds. Goddess Power: A Kids' Book of Greek and Roman Mythology takes you on an extraordinary journey through the triumphs and tragedies of these remarkable women. From Gaia, Goddess of Earth, to Aphrodite, Goddess of Love and Beauty, these legendary ladies’ stories are paired with stunning artwork that brings the myths to life. How will you be inspired by these tales about Greek mythology for kids?
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it was ok
- By Samantha Combs on 12-16-22
By: Yung In Chae
What listeners say about The MisreadBible: Genesis
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Michael McCLain
- 04-21-20
HYSTERICAL
From start to finish - the Bible as it should be told. From the stylings of Monty Python meets Douglas Adams, and done with the many voice talents of Joshua Saxon - who...as GOD, gives you an angry Leprechaun....and it works on so many levels! I had to stop and start because I couldn't stop laughing throughout. From start to glorious ending, quite the twisted tale of the Book of Genesis. I cannot wait to hear the sequel~!
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- Long Island Reader
- 08-07-19
An absolute panic!
This book is funny! The author is obviously quite familiar with the book of Genesis. Anybody that believes that the bible is the literal word of the almighty should stay far away from this audio book. For the rest of us, this version is breath of fresh air. It's sarcastic, insightful, and a panic to listen to. Joshua Saxon does a first class job with the narration. His delivery is perfect.
I am eagerly looking forward to Exodus! I can just imagine what J. R. Eldridge is going to do with Moses, Pharaoh, the 10 Plagues and the Golden Calf!
I was given a free review copy of the audio book at my request and have voluntarily left this review.
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2 people found this helpful
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- murphyfields
- 12-02-19
Strange, blasphemous, hilarious.
First I will cover what this book is not...It is NOT politically correct. It is NOT for the devoutly religious. It is NOT for the easily offended. If any of these describe you, just stop right here and avoid this book. But if these descriptions pique your interest, then this might just be the book for you. And as blasphemous and sacrilegious as this book is, I would not be at all surprised if it led many of its readers/listeners directly to the Bible, if only to discover the source material for the stories and to investigate what parts come from Eldridge's warped mind and what parts are actually from the Bible.
If you are not easily offended, then there is a good chance you will find this book hilarious.
The narration is absolutely perfect, with Saxon giving just the right amount of snark to the text. I can't imagine any other narrator doing a better job with this.
I was given a free copy of this audiobook in exchange for an honest review, which I have voluntarily left here. There was no smiting involved.
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1 person found this helpful
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- Erin Louis
- 01-10-20
Wicked
Far more entertaining than anything I heard in chruch. Highly recommended. Blasphemy at it's finest.
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- Justin
- 06-14-19
Don't pass this one up!
The author gave me an audio copy to review.
I really enjoyed this book. I laughed so hard at the part where Abraham was ninjaing dudes foreskins off that I almost wrecked while driving. So you may not want to listen to the audio book while driving.
This is really well done. The narrator of the audio book is amazing.
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4 people found this helpful
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- Donald G.
- 07-19-19
Excellent
This is a sometimes brutally honest, sometimes cleverly sarcastic retelling of the book of Genesis.
This author playfully recounts all the plot twists, name changes, inconsistencies, and impossible time shifts with irreverent humor.
I haven't been this entertained by an audiobook in a very long time.
The narrator captures the tine perfectly, and us excellent.
I am impatiently waiting on Exodus.
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- Hunter
- 07-24-19
irreverent and funny
**I recieved a free copy of this book for review purposes, my review is voluntary and unbiased.**
Honestly theres not much more to say about this book, it is a witty and brutal dissection of the bible with a bunch of added flair to give the characters more personality, it's a short listen and plenty of fun for an atheist that doesn't mind a lot of foul language.
the narrator sounded like he was enjoying himself as well.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Deedra
- 08-18-19
The Misread Bible: Genesis
A fun riff on the first book in the Bible.You do have to wonder where some of the stuff in there came from.This book explains it in a new way.lol Joshua Saxon was the perfect narrator. I was given this free review copy audiobook at my request and have voluntarily left this review.'
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- Customer
- 06-14-19
A significant bit more adult than I expected
Many parts were hilarious. Many parts were close to explicit. The earlier chapters were better and I loved the bits with Noah's ark.
I was given a free review copy audiobook at my request by the author and have voluntarily left this review.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Marsha L. Woerner
- 10-22-19
The true sense of Genesis
(As posted in GoodReads)
And entertaining view of what Genesis REALLY says! More honest for the general population than the actual words in Genesis having been translated from the original several times in an attempt to convince the world that it's more than a myth :-)
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1 person found this helpful