If you were the kid who held it all together—the one who comforted your parent, kept your sibling safe, made things feel normal when they absolutely weren’t—this episode is for you.

In the first episode of our Parentification 101 mini-series, I sit down with therapist and author Whitney Goodman to talk about what it really means to be a parentified child—and why it so often falls on the eldest daughter.

We talk about the invisible labor kids take on in families affected by addiction and dysfunction. The emotional weight. The unspoken expectations. The way that "being the responsible one" can follow us into adulthood—shaping our relationships, our sense of self, and our deepest fears.

I share what it felt like to be the second mom in my family: the pressure to fix, to manage, to make everything okay—even when I was barely holding it together myself.

This conversation might stir up things you’ve kept buried for a long time. But naming it is how we start to loosen its grip.

Because once we see the role we were never meant to play, we can finally choose a different one.

🎯 This episode will help you understand:

• What parentification actually is—and how to spot it in your story

• The difference between emotional and logistical parentification

• • Why eldest daughters so often carry this invisible burden
  • How it shows up in adulthood as perfectionism, anxiety, people-pleasing
  • And how to begin setting boundaries, letting go of guilt, and honoring the child in you who never got to just be a kid

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  📘 Free sibling e-book: 6 actions to help you navigate a sibling’s substance use journey.

  Download here: https://www.forloveofrecovery.com/e-book

  
  

  🤝 Join our sibling support community: A private group for siblings navigating a loved one’s addiction.

  Join here: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1001711494318102⁠

  • Share your story

  • Connect with siblings who get it

  • Access tools, support, and ongoing conversation

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• Follow us on social for more sibling stories and tools:

  • Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/forloveofrecovery/

• • TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@forloveofrecovery
  • Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61561542956095
    

• 🎙 More from this episode

• • Listen to our Family Dynamics 101 episode: https://open.spotify.com/episode/5dVDA080Dx8SjrDR0Wx5GK

  • Download Whitney’s parentification workbook: https://callinghome.co/topics/the-parentified-child-workbook

  
  More from Whitney's work:

  • Calling Home podcast: https://callinghome.co/blog/listen-to-the-calling-home-podcast
  • About Whitney: https://sitwithwhit.com

Brock Bevell takes us inside his journey—from working as an undercover cop to battling opioid addiction, and ultimately, to becoming a recovery advocate for the Mesa, AZ community.

After a career-ending injury and medical retirement, Brock didn’t just lose his job—he lost his identity. He opens up about the mental health spiral that followed, his doctor’s flawed belief that cops are somehow immune to addiction, and the devastating moment he realized he had become the very person he judged while on the job..

This isn’t a story about rock bottom—it’s a story about what happens next.

Today, Brock leads street-level outreach through The Fentanyl Project, connecting with people deep in addiction, whether they’re ready for change or not. He speaks candidly about the emotional pain that drives substance use, the broken systems that keep people stuck, the evolving fentanyl crisis, and the hope that recovery is always possible—even if the timing isn’t perfect.

This episode may help you:

• See the connection between identity loss, pain and substance use

• Understand why fentanyl is so hard to walk away from

• Learn what actually helps people change

• Discover four key areas that support long-term recovery

  
  

Download our FREE, sibling e-book: ⁠6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey⁠

Join our sibling-focused community: ⁠Siblings For Love of Recovery⁠

Connect with FLOR: ⁠Instagram ⁠and ⁠TikTok⁠

Episode resources:

• • ⁠The Fentanyl Project
  • About Brock Bevell: https://brockbevell.org/ ⁠
    

You've probably heard the myths: that offering housing, food, or money to someone struggling with addiction just “enables” them. That people using suboxone or methadone aren’t ready to make a “real change.” But what if those ideas are not only wrong—but harmful?

In this episode, harm reduction advocate and person in recovery Sarah Laurel dismantles the most persistent misconceptions about harm reduction and addiction, and what it means to truly show up for someone you love. She helps us rethink how harm reduction can not only save lives—but relationships too.

Sarah shares her journey through substance use and recovery, the unwavering support of her mother, and the complicated but evolving bond she shares with her siblings. She speaks candidly about choosing abstinence (recognizing it's not for everyone), why practicing harm reduction still requires boundaries, and how the most compassionate path forward often begins with meeting people exactly where they are.

Sarah also shares how she and the Savage Sisters are saving lives every day in Philadelphia—supporting people who’ve survived overdose and helping families take meaningful action, whether or not their loved ones live with them.

If you’ve ever wrestled with questions like “Am I enabling?”, wondered what harm reduction really looks like in practice, or struggled to balance love with boundaries—this episode is for you. Sarah’s story will help you unpack the nuance, explore the many forms harm reduction can take, and empower you to make choices rooted in compassion, clarity, and your own values.

This episode may help you:

• Understand how providing housing, MAT, food and compassion helps save lives

• Discover the spectrum of harm reduction practices families can practice

• Balance love and boundaries while staying true to your values

Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey

Join our sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

Episode resources:

• Savage Sisters

• What is Harm Reduction?

• Safe Use Hotlines: Safe Spot and Never Use Alone
  

I used to think it was normal—expected, even—for older siblings to step in as a “third parent,” especially when addiction takes hold of a brother or sister. But the deeper my brother’s addiction pulled him in, the more I realized that the real change had to start with me.

In this episode, I open up about my journey from being consumed by fear, anger, and shame to accepting uncertainty, practicing compassion, and learning to meet my brother where he is. If you’ve ever felt torn between detaching or staying connected, I’ll share the research and real-life stories that helped me redefine my role—not as a parent, but as a sibling—while strengthening our bond in the process.

Download our FREE, sibling e-book: 6 actions to help navigate a sibling’s substance use journey

Join our sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

Episode resources:

• The Double Bind of Siblings in Adolescent Substance Abuse Treatment

• TED Talk: “Everything you know about addiction is wrong”

• Start With Hope campaign

Image credit: True Connections: Rat Park

When someone "gets sober" or begins their recovery journey, we want to believe everything will fall back into place. But the truth? Recovery is M E S S Y.

Relationships don’t magically heal overnight. Trust isn’t instantly restored. And for families, the real work is just beginning.

In this episode, Janice Johnson Dowd—author, social worker, and person in recovery—gets real about what it takes to rebuild trust and connection after addiction and the stories shared in her new book, Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery.

She opens up about the lies she told herself, the shame she carried, and the gut-wrenching moment she knew she had to stop drinking. Janice also shares what she wishes her kids had known about addiction, how shame and stigma affect families, the crucial role siblings and loved ones play in healing, why recovery is never a straight line, and the hardest part about facing yourself without substances.

This is a conversation about love, making uncomfortable changes, boundaries, and second chances.

If you're trying to reconnect with a sibling, parent, or partner in recovery—or if you're the one picking up the pieces—this episode is for you.

This episode may help you:

• Understand why addiction should be treated like any other disease

• See how addiction isolates not just the addict, but the whole family

• Learn how to support a loved one in early recovery without losing yourself

• Set boundaries without shutting someone out

• Improve communication and practice open-ended conversations

Join our sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

Connect with FLOR: Instagramand TikTok

About our guest: Janice Johnson Dowd, author and social worker

Buy Janice’s books here: www.janicejohnsondowd.com/my-mission

• Rebuilding Relationships in Recovery

Sibling estrangement can create grief like no other, especially when addiction is part of the equation. In this episode, Fern Schumer Chapman, journalist and author of Brothers, Sisters, Strangers and The Sibling Estrangement Journal, opens up about her 40-year estrangement from her brother and the profound emotional toll it took on her.

Fern’s story offers a raw look at the pain and complexities of sibling relationships affected by addiction. She shares how setting boundaries, in the face of addiction, sometimes means cutting ties—and the unique grief that comes with that decision. Whether you’re navigating your own estrangement or just seeking to understand the dynamics at play, Fern provides practical advice for coping with the heartache, finding healing, and ultimately, reclaiming peace.

If you’ve ever struggled with family dynamics shaped by addiction or the loss of a sibling relationship, this episode is for you.

This episode may help you:

• Gain practical tips for understanding and coping with the grief and emotional toll of sibling estrangement, particularly when addiction is a factor
• Learn how to set healthy boundaries in difficult family dynamics while prioritizing your own emotional well-being.
• Discover ways to find acceptance, healing and from estrangement
• Identify if reconnecting is an option, and how to do so in a way that works for you

Join our sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

Connect with FLOR: Instagram and TikTok

About our guest: Fern Schumer Chapman, author and journalist

Buy Fern’s books here:

• The Sibling Estrangement Journal
• Brothers, Sisters, Strangers: SIbling Estrangement and the Road to Reconciliation

Feeling torn between “tough love” and showing support? What if the answer is not choosing between helping or detaching, but finding a balance? In this episode, Molly Sinclair, takes us through her journey of navigating her mom’s, her brother’s, and her own addiction with empathy and boundaries. Molly explains evidence-based tools like the Invitation to Change approach, whether you should let someone hit “rock-bottom” and other insights to help you start the new year with clarity and compassion.

This episode may help you:

• Decide whether Al-Anon/Nar-Anon, CRAFT, or the Invitation to Change is right for you

• Understand how to support a loved one through their addiction or recovery

• Identify what’s a true emergency, and how to respond (not react) to it

Join our sibling-focused community: Siblings For Love of Recovery

Connect with FLOR:

• Instagram

• TikTok

Our guest speaker: Molly Sinclair

Family addiction can bring holiday stress, uncertainty, heartbreak, and tension to what’s supposed to be a joyful season. If gatherings feel overwhelming as you're navigating a loved one’s substance use (especially a sibling's), you're not alone.

Minaa B., licensed social worker, mental health educator, and author of Owning Our Struggles, shares how to set boundaries, prioritize self-care, and protect your peace amidst the chaos. Because even in difficult times, you deserve a peaceful holiday season celebrated in a way that works best for you.

This episode may help you:

• Navigate complex sibling and family relationships during family gatherings

• Discover strategies to build boundaries and create your own peace during holidays

• Feel empowered to start your own holiday traditions that work for you

Join our sibling-focused community: https://www.facebook.com/groups/1001711494318102

Connect with FLOR:

• Instagram: ⁠⁠@forloveofrecovery⁠⁠

• TikTok: ⁠⁠@forloveofrecovery⁠⁠

Our guest speaker, Minaa B:

• About Minaa B: https://www.minaab.com/