Episode 311: Vaping at the Gym, Crazy Karens & Dumpster Fire Detox

This week, Jay’s calling out chaos, celebrating legends, and laying down some truth bombs you didn’t know you needed. If you’ve ever wanted to fight someone over a shopping cart or scream into the void about people being late—this one’s for you.

🧨 Dumbass of the Week:

• A full-grown adult “Karen” loses it on an 18-year-old front desk staffer—all because they asked for a photo to complete her membership. The tantrum ended with her calling the teen a bitch. Stay classy, Karen.

🙌 Shoutouts of the Week:

• Bob turns 80 and is still crushing life and workouts—Jay’s been training him for 15 years. LEGEND.

• Arlene, thanks for the drinks! You’re what happy hour is all about. 💃

🔁 Jared Update:

• Restraining order? Denied.

• The real question of the week: Chipotle or Panda Express? (Hint: either way, you’ll need a bathroom strategy.)

🚨 Call Out of the Week:

• School zone speeders and maniac drivers—we see you, and we’re putting you in The Box. Drive like someone’s kid lives here. Because they do.

💪 Stuff I See at the Gym:

• Someone vaping inside the gym. Another person hotboxing their car at the red light. Make it make sense.

🛑 A Word From Our Sponsor:

• Buzzed Buddy: Helping you drink smarter, not harder. Protect your liver, brain, and tomorrow’s plans.

🧍‍♂️ Humans In The Wild:

• Utah’s soda addiction is REAL. Like drive-thru soda shops… everywhere.

• A tire literally breaks off a car in the grocery store parking lot.

• Couple on date night at dinner… watching YouTube on their phone the entire time. Romance is not dead—it’s just buffering.

📱 Social Media Shenanigans:

• Local Internet Drama: Two guys from Jay’s area going full keyboard warrior on Facebook.

• Cart Narc is back with another viral “PUT YOUR CART BACK” confrontation. People are WILD.

🧯 Closing Thought of the Week:

“I know I say this all the time… but in a world of pure dumpster fire dumbassery, be the fire extinguisher.”

Episode 310: Escorts In Aruba, BBL Confusion & Cold Plunge Chaos

This week’s episode of Happy Hour With Jay is packed with wild humans, spa mishaps, and just the right amount of unsolicited life advice. Jay’s got stories you’ll laugh at, cringe through, and probably replay for your friends.
📣 Shoutout to One Leg Kevin ~ Thanks For Being A Good Human

🔥 Meme of the Week:

• “Stop worrying if people like you… they don’t.”
• Back-Up Meme: “When you’re dead, you don’t know you're dead. The pain is only felt by others. The same thing happens when you’re stupid.” 💀

🚨 Happening Now:

• Jared’s on the pot (literally) and his stolen credit card hired an escort in Aruba. Capital One was… concerned.
• A SoCal Silver Fox gets tattooed, tokes too hard, and forgets how gas caps work. Jay to the rescue.
• Jay learns what a BBL (Brazilian Butt Lift) is—cue shock, confusion, and concern for humanity.
• The Golden Girls are out here vamping, crushing espresso martinis, and offering hits to strangers. Age is just a number.
• Waymo vs. Humans: A Scottsdale psycho Lyft ride helps Jay understand why robot cars might just be winning.

💪 Gym Tales:

• Sweet lady shows up smelling like a gallon of BenGay and crushes her treadmill workout. Respect.

🧖‍♂️ Spa Chronicles:

• Cold Plunge Chaos: A father-son duo turns the spa into a Disneyland ride.
• Soundtrack from Hell: From calm zen vibes to Dumb and Dumber screeching. You had to be there.
• No Nudity Allowed: Cold Plunge Fruit Salad. Enough said. (And thank goodness for rules.)

❌ Things I Won’t Do:

• Jay still refuses to grab the first can or box off the shelf. Yes, he’s that guy.

🥂 Buzzed Buddy Update:

• That Mother’s Day email? Fire. If you're not on the list, fix that.

🐥 Feel-Good Story of the Week:

• Jackpot the Duck ~ We all need a little help!

Episode 309: Barking Dogs, Book Reports & Belichick's Wild Love Life

This week on Happy Hour with Jay, we’re back with another uncensored, hilarious, and brutally honest rundown of what’s happening in the world—from the dog park to credit card fraud to Bill Belichick’s eyebrow-raising relationship. Buckle up.

Here's what we're getting into:

🎭 Meme of the Week:
“Don't put your drama on social media and then tell us to mind our business. Listen, I’m on Season 2, Episode 3 of your nonsense.”
You already know Jay has thoughts… and he’s watching.

💬 Listener Shoutout:
Jared comes in hot with a full-on book report about the podcast—likes, dislikes, analysis. Jay’s got to respond, because that level of feedback deserves a moment.

🐶 Dog Park Wisdom:
20 tiny dogs losing their minds. One big dog, chill and unbothered. Welcome to Earth in 2025. Jay breaks down why the loudest barkers rarely matter—and how you can be the calm, collected dog.

💳 Credit Card Chaos:
Top Golf. The NFL Courage Awards. Maryland. Fraud. Jay shares a personal tale that will make you think twice about how secure your info really is. (Spoiler: it’s not.)

🏈 Inside the NFL Awards:
From karaoke night with NFL punters to Cedric Benson stories and kicker kindness, Jay pulls back the curtain on what really goes down at the Ed Block Courage Awards weekend.

😳 Things That Make You Go “HUH?”
Bill Belichick, 73. Jordan Hudson, 24. A CBS interview. Uncomfortable levels of “ick.” Jay doesn’t hold back.

💪 Gym Tales You Can’t Unsee:
Dudes on the phone while at the urinal—make it make sense. One hand holding the phone, the other… well, occupied.

📲 Social Media Shenanigans:
If you’ve posted “Facebook does NOT have my permission…” Jay has a message for you: stop. Just stop. You’ve officially lost the plot.

🤚 Things Jay Refuses to Do:
Eat with his hands. He knows it’s weird. He owns it.

🍸 Buzzed Buddy Update:
We’ve officially partnered with Girl About Town! The movement to drink smarter and live better is growing—and this collab is one for the books.

📣 Call Out of the Week:
Generation Z, consider this your notice. Jay’s got a few words about the 13- to 28-year-old crew.

🧠 Final Message:
Stop wasting time worrying what people think of you. They aren’t. Everyone’s just trying to survive their own mess. And those that are thinking about you? That’s none of your business.