Healing Together
A Guide to Supporting Sexual Abuse Survivors
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Narrated by:
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Anne Marie Miller
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By:
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Anne Miller
About this listen
Sex is such an intimate topic historically wrapped in shame and when someone shares they were sexually abused, we may not know how to respond.
With recent #MeToo and #ChurchToo movements, we are learning just how many men, women, boys, and girls have suffered sexual abuse at the hands of a trusted person, often family members or leaders in the church. Sexual abuse is rampant in modern society and now - sometimes many years later - sexual abuse survivors are sharing their stories.
Anne Marie Miller is a survivor of childhood clergy sexual abuse and has shared her journey toward healing with audiences all over the world. After speaking with thousands of survivors and their loved ones, she saw the need for a fundamental and practical guide for helping supporters of sexual abuse survivors understand the basics of abuse, trauma, healing, and hope. Drawing from her own experience as a survivor and evidence-based research, Anne addresses these questions and more in Healing Together:
- What is sexual abuse?
- How can I help survivors?
- Who are predators and how do they groom victims?
- How does trauma affect survivors?
- What happens when someone doesn't remember the details of their abuse?
- How does abuse wound the physical, emotional, and spiritual health of people who have been abused?
- When and how should authorities be contacted?
- How do you talk to your children about sexual abuse?
- What are the warning signs of abuse?
- Is healing possible?
Whether you are a spouse, a family member, a friend, or a church leader looking for easy-to-navigate resources to understand and support sexual abuse survivors, you'll find answers and hope in this audiobook.
Detailed appendixes on trauma, memory, and legal terms are available in the audiobook companion PDF download.
PLEASE NOTE: When you purchase this title, the accompanying PDF will be available in your Audible Library along with the audio.
©2020 Anne Miller (P)2020 ZondervanListeners also enjoyed...
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Coupling stories of abused women and abusive men from her own case studies, Patricia Evans here gives you the tools you need to transform your relationship. Most important, she assures you that such a transformation is possible—given the right circumstances. Evans also helps you determine if your abuser really has changed—or if he’s merely creating the illusion of change. And if he hasn’t changed, Evans helps you decide whether it’s time to leave the relationship—and what to do when it is.
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A gift to the emotionally violated
- By curious23m on 08-16-15
By: Patricia Evans
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When Your Kid Is Hurting
- Helping Your Child Through the Tough Days
- By: Kevin Leman
- Narrated by: Jon Gauger
- Length: 7 hrs and 29 mins
- Unabridged
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Children today live in an unpredictable, disruptive, and often violent world. Many of them live in two different homes with different sets of expectations. They face bullying at school and online. They hear news of school shootings, and racially or religiously motivated violence. They may have lost a friend or a loved one. As parents, the impulse to protect our children is strong, but that very protection can end up handicapping them for life. Rather than seek to save them from the hard things, parents must teach their kids how to cope with and rise above their problems.
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So helpful for so many situations
- By Natalie on 10-03-18
By: Kevin Leman
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When Dad Hurts Mom
- Helping Your Children Heal the Wounds of Witnessing Abuse
- By: Lundy Bancroft
- Narrated by: Randye Kaye
- Length: 10 hrs and 52 mins
- Unabridged
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Can my partner abuse me and still be a good parent? Should I stay with my partner for my children's sake? How should I talk to my children about the abuse and help them heal? Am I a bad mother? Mothers in physically or emotionally abusive relationships ask themselves these questions every day. Whether it's physical or "just" emotional abuse, whether it's aimed at them or you, whether they see or hear it, your kids need you.
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Great information. Not the best narrator.
- By RT on 06-28-19
By: Lundy Bancroft
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Parenting the New Teen in the Age of Anxiety
- Raising Happy, Healthy Humans Ages 8 to 24
- By: Dr. John Duffy
- Narrated by: Anne Cross
- Length: 7 hrs and 48 mins
- Unabridged
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No parent experienced their teen years the way that children do today. This guide provides strategies and tips for actively learning the world of our children.
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Every parent should read this!!
- By Kitty Kitty on 10-20-19
By: Dr. John Duffy
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Bringing Up Girls
- Practical Advice and Encouragement for Those Shaping the Next Generation of Women
- By: James C. Dobson
- Narrated by: James C. Dobson
- Length: 11 hrs and 15 mins
- Unabridged
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Based on extensive research, and handled with Dr. Dobson's trademark down-to-earth approach, Bringing Up Girls will equip parents like you to face the challenges of raising your daughters to become healthy, happy, and successful women who overcome challenges specific to girls and women today and who ultimately excel in life.
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Solid concepts, poor presentation
- By honuhunter on 12-06-18
By: James C. Dobson
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Growing Yourself Back Up
- Understanding Emotional Regression
- By: John Lee
- Narrated by: BJ Harrison
- Length: 7 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
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We've all experienced moments when we lose control of a situation and ourselves. Now, in Growing Yourself Back Up, the first book to explain the idea of emotional regression to the general listener, best-selling author John Lee identifies the circumstances that cause these seemingly uncontrollable feelings and shows how they are directly tied to our experience as children.
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A Must Read for All Human Beings
- By Dr Brandon Wardell, DBH, MAMFT, NCC, LPC on 08-04-20
By: John Lee
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The Science of Stuck
- Breaking Through Inertia to Find Your Path Forward
- By: Britt Frank LSCSW
- Narrated by: Sasha Heinz, Britt Frank LSCSW
- Length: 7 hrs and 8 mins
- Unabridged
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We all experience stuckness in our lives. We feel stuck in our relationships, career paths, body struggles, addiction issues, and more. Many of us know what we need to do to move forward—but find ourselves unable to take the leap to make it happen. And then we blame and shame ourselves, and stay in a loop of self-doubt that goes nowhere. The good news is you’re not lazy, crazy, or unmotivated. In this empowering and action-oriented guide, you’ll discover why we can’t think our way forward—and how to break through what’s holding us back.
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Mental health is a physical process
- By Meagen G. on 04-18-22
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The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans
- How to Decode Their Behavior, Develop Unshakable Trust, and Raise a Respectable Adult
- By: Josh Shipp
- Narrated by: Roger Wayne
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
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Written in Shipp's playfully authoritative, no-nonsense voice, The Grown-Up's Guide to Teenage Humans tells his story and unpacks practical strategies that can make a difference. Ultimately, it's not about shortcuts or magic words - as Shipp reminds us, it's about investing in kids and giving them the love, time, and support they need to thrive. And that means every kid is one caring adult away from being a success story.
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Read it....then read it again!
- By R. Eichelberger on 11-07-17
By: Josh Shipp
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Social Justice Parenting
- How to Raise Compassionate, Anti-Racist, Justice-Minded Kids in an Unjust World
- By: Traci Baxley
- Narrated by: Traci Baxley
- Length: 6 hrs and 56 mins
- Unabridged
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As a global pandemic shuttered schools across the country in 2020, parents found themselves thrust into the role of teacher — in more ways than one. Not only did they take on remote school supervision, but after the murder of George Floyd and the ensuing Black Lives Matter protests, many also grappled with the responsibility to teach their kids about social justice — with few resources to guide them.
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Inspiring, motivating, practical
- By Heather Janetzko on 03-18-24
By: Traci Baxley
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Worthy of Her Trust
- What You Need to Do to Rebuild Sexual Integrity and Win Her Back
- By: Stephen Arterburn, Jason B. Martinkus
- Narrated by: Tom Parks, Kate Rudd
- Length: 6 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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Trust can be rebuilt in your marriage! With patient, loving, self-sacrificing effort, it's possible that one day your wife will risk her heart with you again. And she may even have more respect and love for you than before. In Worthy of Her Trust, Jason Martinkus relates how he repaired his own marriage after revelations of sexual addiction. Along with Stephen Arterburn, Jason offers exercises and tools to help your marriage begin again.
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Best Book on Building Trust
- By Layne & Rylan on 03-05-15
By: Stephen Arterburn, and others
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Twenty Things Adopted Kids Wish Their Adoptive Parents Knew
- By: Sherrie Eldridge
- Narrated by: Rosemary Benson
- Length: 6 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
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The voices of adopted children are poignant, questioning. And they tell a familiar story of loss, fear, and hope. This extraordinary book, written by a woman who was adopted herself, gives voice to children's unspoken concerns, and shows adoptive parents how to free their kids from feelings of fear, abandonment, and shame. With warmth and candor, Sherrie Eldridge reveals the 20 complex emotional issues you must understand to nurture the child you love.
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The glass is half empty.
- By stephen blackwell on 07-19-24
By: Sherrie Eldridge
What listeners say about Healing Together
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Adam Shields
- 12-18-19
Helpful boon on responding to sexual abuse
Summary: Part her own story of sexual abuse at the hands of a pastor and part guide to being with survivors of sexual abuse in your context.
I have ‘known’ Anne Marie Miller for a very long time. I started reading her blog around 12 years ago. I have read all of her books. She ended up marrying the cousin of a high school friend of mine. I have appreciated being able to pray for her regularly as I follow along with her life via social media and the occasional email. I am not coming at Healing Together dispassionately. I was an early reader of one of her earlier books, one where she first detailed her sexual abuse.
Anne Miller is an example of a number of (primarily) women that have taken their abuse public because the desire for a better response by the church. Her abuse was at the hands of a church staff. Rachael Denhollander’s was at the hands of a sports doctor; others have been abused by teachers, parents, etc. Regardless of the context, the pain and trauma continue, and the context will be forever tainted. Church-based sexual abuse is particularly a problem because the church should be one of the places that are most responsive to sexual abuse survivors. But even a casual understanding of sexual abuse can see that churches often re-victimize abuse survivors.
Healing Together is doing several things. One is Anne’s own story. I primarily listened to the audiobook of Healing Together with Anne reading. I did that intentionally because I wanted to be able to hear her voice tell her own story. Anne is still recovering from a freak accident where she lost several teeth and has had to have multiple surgeries to reconstruct her jaw. Because I have known her for a while, I can hear some of that damage in her voice, but the audiobook is certainly still a good option for this Healing Together.
The second focus of Healing Together is understanding of what sexual abuse is, how the legal system works, simple definitions of terminology, and a guide on how to be in solidarity with abuse survivors. Her context is the church but this is not just a church-based guide. It is a guide that would be helpful for anyone, whether you are aware of abuse in your context or not. The reality is that whether you know it or not, you know people that have been sexually abused.
Anne Miller has pursued removing her abuser from ministry but like many cases, it is also a textbook example of how churches tend to not handle abuse well. When she first reported, her abuser was an executive with the SBC International Mission Board. IMB found her abuse credible, but instead of firing him and removing him from ministry, IMB allowed him to resign, and he returned to church ministry within a matter of weeks. When Miller realized years later that he had returned to another denominational position and that he could still be criminally charged, she pursued the criminal case. But while he eventually pled guilty, he was allowed to plead guilty to a minor charge. The sentencing phase made that minor charge worse, allowing him to serve only 30 days in jail, if he meets the terms of his parole, the sexual abuse label will be removed from his record, and theoretically, under current SBC rules, he can return to the ministry and a background check will now show his criminal sexual abuse.
I am aware of many examples of the harassment that Anne Miller has endured in the wake of the criminal prosecution. Even this book was dropped by Lifeway publisher because she refused to say that abuse victims needed to return to the church. So she had to find yet another publisher, turning to one that was owned and controlled by a secular company.
Books like this are not ‘fun’. But they are important. We need to understand how to be in solidarity with people and to do what is necessary, without further victimizing them. The Kindle edition is being kept at $2. The paperback can be bought by the case. Read it and give it to those in your life that need to know.
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