
If I Disappear
Failed to add items
Add to Cart failed.
Add to Wish List failed.
Remove from wishlist failed.
Adding to library failed
Follow podcast failed
Unfollow podcast failed
$0.99/mo for the first 3 months

Buy for $18.00
No default payment method selected.
We are sorry. We are not allowed to sell this product with the selected payment method
-
Narrated by:
-
Kristen Sieh
About this listen
“This new novel has more twists and fakeouts than an episode of Serial.” (Rolling Stone)
“An eerie, twisted thriller sure to shake up the most seasoned true crime die-hard." (Harper's Bazaar)
A Most Anticipated Book of 2021 by Rolling Stone • CNN • E! Online • Buzzfeed • New York Post • PopSugar • Woman's Day • Crime Reads • Hello Giggles
When her favorite true-crime podcast host goes missing, an adrift young woman sets out to investigate and plunges headfirst into the wild backcountry of Northern California and her own dangerous obsession.
Sera loves true-crime podcasts. They give her a sense of control in a world where women just like her disappear daily. She's sure they are preparing her for something. So when Rachel, her favorite podcast host, goes missing, Sera knows it's time to act. Rachel has always taught her to trust her instincts.
Sera follows the clues hidden in the episodes to an isolated ranch outside Rachel's small hometown to begin her search. She's convinced her investigation will make Rachel so proud. But the more Sera digs into this unfamiliar world, the more off things start to feel. Because Rachel is not the first woman to vanish from the ranch, and she won't be the last....
Rachel did try to warn her.
©2021 Eliza Jane Brazier (P)2021 Penguin AudioListeners also enjoyed...
-
Girls and Their Horses
- By: Eliza Jane Brazier
- Narrated by: Helen Laser
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When the nouveau riche Parker family moves to an exclusive community in the heart of Southern California, they believe it’s their chance at a fresh start. Heather Parker is determined to give her daughters the life she never had—starting with horses. She signs them up for riding lessons at Rancho Santa Fe Equestrian, where horses are a lifestyle. Heather becomes a “Barn Mom,” part of a group of wealthy women who hang at the stables, drink wine, and prepare their daughters for competition.
-
-
Narrating is so good!!
- By Aly on 08-10-23
-
All Good People Here
- A Novel
- By: Ashley Flowers
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley, Karissa Vacker, Ashley Flowers
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Everyone from Wakarusa, Indiana, remembers the infamous case of January Jacobs, who was discovered in a ditch hours after her family awoke to find her gone. Margot Davies was six at the time, the same age as January—and they were next-door neighbors. In the twenty years since, Margot has grown up, moved away, and become a big-city journalist. But she’s always been haunted by the feeling that it could’ve been her. And the worst part is, January’s killer has never been brought to justice.
-
-
this is literally the JonBenet Ramsey‘s story
- By Callie on 08-19-22
By: Ashley Flowers
-
Stone Cold Fox
- By: Rachel Koller Croft
- Narrated by: Carlotta Brentan
- Length: 11 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Like any enterprising woman, Bea knows what she’s worth and is determined to get all she deserves—it just so happens that what she deserves is to marry rich. Filthy rich. After years of forced instruction by her mother in the art of swindling men, a now-solo Bea wants nothing more than to close and lock the door on their sordid partnership so she can disappear safely into old-money domesticity, sealing the final phase of her escape. When Bea chooses her ultimate target in the fully loaded, thoroughly dull and blue-blooded Collin Case, she’s ready to deploy all of her tricks one last time.
-
-
Dark sinister mother & daughter
- By Jill R. Misrack on 03-03-23
-
Mother-Daughter Murder Night
- A Novel
- By: Nina Simon
- Narrated by: Jane Oppenheimer
- Length: 12 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
High-powered businesswoman Lana Rubicon has a lot to be proud of: her keen intelligence, impeccable taste, and the L.A. real estate empire she’s built. But when she finds herself trapped 300 miles north of the city, convalescing in a sleepy coastal town with her adult daughter Beth and teenage granddaughter Jack, Lana is stuck counting otters instead of square footage—and hoping that boredom won’t kill her before the cancer does.
-
-
Don’t waste your money
- By Audrey Russell on 09-14-23
By: Nina Simon
-
A Familiar Stranger
- By: A. R. Torre
- Narrated by: Christina Traister, Chris Ciulla, Patrick Lawlor, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lillian Smith leads an unexceptional life, writing obituaries and killing time with her inattentive husband and disconnected son. Then she meets David, a handsome stranger, in a coffee shop. Lured into an affair, she invents a new persona, one without strings, deadlines, or brooding husbands. Lillian has never felt so reckless, unpredictable, or wanted. But as her affair with David intensifies, she withdraws from everything that’s real, even her closest friend.
-
-
Just awful, what did I just waste a credit on?
- By cindy on 09-29-22
By: A. R. Torre
-
A Flicker in the Dark
- A Novel
- By: Stacy Willingham
- Narrated by: Karissa Vacker
- Length: 11 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Chloe Davis was twelve, six teenage girls went missing in her small Louisiana town. By the end of the summer, her own father had confessed to the crimes and was put away for life, leaving Chloe and the rest of her family to grapple with the truth and try to move forward while dealing with the aftermath.
-
-
Enjoyable story and narrative
- By Patricia on 01-14-22
By: Stacy Willingham
-
Girls and Their Horses
- By: Eliza Jane Brazier
- Narrated by: Helen Laser
- Length: 9 hrs and 58 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When the nouveau riche Parker family moves to an exclusive community in the heart of Southern California, they believe it’s their chance at a fresh start. Heather Parker is determined to give her daughters the life she never had—starting with horses. She signs them up for riding lessons at Rancho Santa Fe Equestrian, where horses are a lifestyle. Heather becomes a “Barn Mom,” part of a group of wealthy women who hang at the stables, drink wine, and prepare their daughters for competition.
-
-
Narrating is so good!!
- By Aly on 08-10-23
-
All Good People Here
- A Novel
- By: Ashley Flowers
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley, Karissa Vacker, Ashley Flowers
- Length: 10 hrs and 35 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Everyone from Wakarusa, Indiana, remembers the infamous case of January Jacobs, who was discovered in a ditch hours after her family awoke to find her gone. Margot Davies was six at the time, the same age as January—and they were next-door neighbors. In the twenty years since, Margot has grown up, moved away, and become a big-city journalist. But she’s always been haunted by the feeling that it could’ve been her. And the worst part is, January’s killer has never been brought to justice.
-
-
this is literally the JonBenet Ramsey‘s story
- By Callie on 08-19-22
By: Ashley Flowers
-
Stone Cold Fox
- By: Rachel Koller Croft
- Narrated by: Carlotta Brentan
- Length: 11 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Like any enterprising woman, Bea knows what she’s worth and is determined to get all she deserves—it just so happens that what she deserves is to marry rich. Filthy rich. After years of forced instruction by her mother in the art of swindling men, a now-solo Bea wants nothing more than to close and lock the door on their sordid partnership so she can disappear safely into old-money domesticity, sealing the final phase of her escape. When Bea chooses her ultimate target in the fully loaded, thoroughly dull and blue-blooded Collin Case, she’s ready to deploy all of her tricks one last time.
-
-
Dark sinister mother & daughter
- By Jill R. Misrack on 03-03-23
-
Mother-Daughter Murder Night
- A Novel
- By: Nina Simon
- Narrated by: Jane Oppenheimer
- Length: 12 hrs and 38 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
High-powered businesswoman Lana Rubicon has a lot to be proud of: her keen intelligence, impeccable taste, and the L.A. real estate empire she’s built. But when she finds herself trapped 300 miles north of the city, convalescing in a sleepy coastal town with her adult daughter Beth and teenage granddaughter Jack, Lana is stuck counting otters instead of square footage—and hoping that boredom won’t kill her before the cancer does.
-
-
Don’t waste your money
- By Audrey Russell on 09-14-23
By: Nina Simon
-
A Familiar Stranger
- By: A. R. Torre
- Narrated by: Christina Traister, Chris Ciulla, Patrick Lawlor, and others
- Length: 7 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Lillian Smith leads an unexceptional life, writing obituaries and killing time with her inattentive husband and disconnected son. Then she meets David, a handsome stranger, in a coffee shop. Lured into an affair, she invents a new persona, one without strings, deadlines, or brooding husbands. Lillian has never felt so reckless, unpredictable, or wanted. But as her affair with David intensifies, she withdraws from everything that’s real, even her closest friend.
-
-
Just awful, what did I just waste a credit on?
- By cindy on 09-29-22
By: A. R. Torre
-
A Flicker in the Dark
- A Novel
- By: Stacy Willingham
- Narrated by: Karissa Vacker
- Length: 11 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
When Chloe Davis was twelve, six teenage girls went missing in her small Louisiana town. By the end of the summer, her own father had confessed to the crimes and was put away for life, leaving Chloe and the rest of her family to grapple with the truth and try to move forward while dealing with the aftermath.
-
-
Enjoyable story and narrative
- By Patricia on 01-14-22
By: Stacy Willingham
-
The Senator's Wife
- A Novel
- By: Liv Constantine
- Narrated by: Kirsten Potter
- Length: 9 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
After a tragic chain of events led to the deaths of their spouses two years ago, D.C. philanthropist Sloane Chase and Senator Whit Montgomery are finally starting to move on. The horrifying ordeal drew them together, and now they're ready to settle down again—with each other. As Sloane returns to the world of White House dinners and political small talk, this time with her new husband, she's also preparing for an upcoming hip replacement—the latest reminder of the lupus diagnosis she's managed since her twenties.
-
-
Not my favorite LC
- By Raya on 07-05-23
By: Liv Constantine
-
The Club
- A Novel
- By: Ellery Lloyd
- Narrated by: Tamaryn Payne
- Length: 9 hrs and 22 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
The Home Group is a glamorous collection of celebrity members' clubs dotted across the globe, where the rich and famous can party hard and then crash out in its five-star suites, far from the prying eyes of fans and the media.
-
-
Wasted Potentail
- By Bitten and Seven Forever on 03-05-22
By: Ellery Lloyd
-
Local Woman Missing
- By: Mary Kubica
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley, Jennifer Jill Araya, Gary Tiedemann, and others
- Length: 11 hrs and 40 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Shelby Tebow is the first to go missing. Not long after, Meredith Dickey and her six-year-old daughter, Delilah, vanish just blocks away from where Shelby was last seen, striking fear into their once-peaceful community. Are these incidents connected? After an elusive search that yields more questions than answers, the case eventually goes cold. Now, 11 years later, Delilah shockingly returns. Everyone wants to know what happened to her, but no one is prepared for what they'll find....
-
-
Best Kubica yet!!!
- By LA book lover on 05-18-21
By: Mary Kubica
-
We Are All the Same in the Dark
- A Novel
- By: Julia Heaberlin
- Narrated by: Jenna Lamia, Catherine Taber, MacLeod Andrews, and others
- Length: 10 hrs and 53 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It’s been a decade since Trumanell Branson disappeared, leaving only a bloody handprint behind. Her pretty face still hangs like a watchful queen on the posters on the walls of the town’s Baptist church, the police station, and in the high school. They all promise the same thing: We will find you. Meanwhile, Tru's brother, Wyatt, lives as a pariah in the desolation of the old family house, cleared of wrongdoing by the police but tried and sentenced in the court of public opinion and in a new documentary about the crime.
-
-
On the edge of my ladder
- By Deirdre Hoinoski on 08-27-20
By: Julia Heaberlin
-
The Golden Couple
- A Novel
- By: Greer Hendricks, Sarah Pekkanen
- Narrated by: Karissa Vacker, Marin Ireland
- Length: 11 hrs and 3 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
If Avery Chambers can’t fix you in 10 sessions, she won’t take you on as a client. Her successes are phenomenal—she helps people overcome everything from domineering parents to assault—and almost absorbs the emptiness she sometimes feels since her husband’s death. Marissa and Mathew Bishop seem like the golden couple—until Marissa cheats. She wants to repair things, both because she loves her husband and for the sake of their eight-year-old son. After a friend forwards an article about Avery, Marissa takes a chance on this maverick therapist.
-
-
WOW, ..needs to be a series!
- By Amazon Customer on 03-12-22
By: Greer Hendricks, and others
-
Pretty Things
- A Novel
- By: Janelle Brown
- Narrated by: Julia Whelan, Lauren Fortgang, Hillary Huber
- Length: 16 hrs and 6 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Nina once bought into the idea that her fancy liberal arts degree would lead to a fulfilling career. When that dream crashed, she turned to stealing from rich kids in LA alongside her wily Irish boyfriend, Lachlan. Nina learned from the best: Her mother was the original con artist, hustling to give her daughter a decent childhood despite their wayward life. But when her mom gets sick, Nina puts everything on the line to help her, even if it means running her most audacious, dangerous scam yet.
-
-
SO GOOD
- By sandraleeweston on 04-28-20
By: Janelle Brown
-
The Husbands
- A Novel
- By: Chandler Baker
- Narrated by: Allyson Ryan
- Length: 12 hrs and 12 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Nora Spangler is a successful attorney but when it comes to domestic life, she packs the lunches, schedules the doctor appointments, knows where the extra paper towel rolls are, and designs and orders the holiday cards. Her husband works hard, too...but why does it seem like she is always working so much harder?
-
-
a fun feminist romp!
- By Barbara S on 08-14-21
By: Chandler Baker
-
The Social Climber
- By: Amanda Pellegrino
- Narrated by: Kristen Sieh
- Length: 9 hrs and 23 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
It’s the week before her wedding, and all of Eliza’s meticulous planning is about to pay off. She’s become the exact type of woman who would marry into the prominent, blue-blood Walker family–Ivy League credentials, a high-powered PR job, and a designer label wardrobe. But as the big day approaches, secrets from Eliza’s past attending an Evangelical college start to throw her true motives into question. Who exactly is Eliza Bennett and what does she really want?
-
-
English Literature & Audiobook Listener
- By Elena Maria Benavides on 04-06-23
-
The Only One Left
- A Novel
- By: Riley Sager
- Narrated by: Christine Lakin, Dawn Harvey
- Length: 12 hrs and 32 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Now reduced to a schoolyard chant, the Hope family murders shocked the Maine coast one bloody night in 1929. While most people assume seventeen-year-old Lenora was responsible, the police were never able to prove it. Other than her denial after the killings, she has never spoken publicly about that night, nor has she set foot outside Hope’s End, the cliffside mansion where the massacre occurred.
-
-
Can't take it anymore
- By Amazon Customer on 06-28-23
By: Riley Sager
-
No One Needs to Know
- A Novel
- By: Lindsay Cameron
- Narrated by: Brittany Pressley, Rebecca Lowman
- Length: 9 hrs and 24 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
UrbanMyth: It was lauded as an alternative to the performative, show-your-best-self platforms—an anonymous discussion board grouped by zip code. The residents of Manhattan’s exclusive Upper East Side disclosed it all, things they would never share with their friends or their spouses: secret bank accounts, steamy affairs, tidbits of juicy gossip. So when a “hacktivist” group breaks into the forum and exposes the real identity of each poster, the repercussions echo down Park Avenue with a force that none could have anticipated.
-
-
Fantastic Story; Great Narration
- By Bookguy20 on 05-09-23
By: Lindsay Cameron
-
The Intern
- A Novel
- By: Michele Campbell
- Narrated by: Sarah Mollo-Christensen
- Length: 11 hrs and 9 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Madison Rivera lands the internship of a lifetime working for Judge Kathryn Conroy. But Madison has a secret that could destroy her career. Her troubled younger brother Danny has been arrested, and Conroy is the judge on his case. When Danny goes missing after accusing the judge of corruption, Madison’s quest for answers brings her deep into the judge’s glamorous world. Is Kathryn Conroy a mentor, a victim, or a criminal? Is she trying to help Madison or use her as a pawn? And why is somebody trying to kill her?
-
-
Another Terrific Michele Campbell Novel
- By William G. Stuart on 11-15-23
By: Michele Campbell
-
Bad Summer People
- A Novel
- By: Emma Rosenblum
- Narrated by: January LaVoy
- Length: 10 hrs and 7 mins
- Unabridged
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
Jen Weinstein and Lauren Parker rule the town of Salcombe, Fire Island every summer. They hold sway on the beach and the tennis court, and are adept at manipulating people to get what they want. Their husbands, Sam and Jason, have summered together on the island since childhood, despite lifelong grudges and numerous secrets. Their one single friend, Rachel Woolf, is looking to meet her match, whether he’s the tennis pro. But even with plenty to gossip about, this season starts out as quietly as any other. Until a body is discovered, face down, off the side of the boardwalk.
-
-
Not a thriller, not a mystery
- By Anonymous User on 05-25-23
By: Emma Rosenblum
Critic reviews
"This author is a breath of fresh air in an oversaturated, congested world of thrillers. Watch out, Gillian Flynn - mystery thrillers have a new ingenue and her name is Eliza Jane Brazier.” (Pittsburgh Post-Gazette)
“This twisted and riveting thriller is one that will keep you up late at night with suspense.” (CNN)
“A skillful dissection of true-crime podcast culture and those obsessed with it, this new novel has more twists and fakeouts than an episode of Serial.... If I Disappear throws into sharp relief how desensitized we can become when we treat real life like a game.” (Rolling Stone)
What listeners say about If I Disappear
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Amazon Customer
- 06-14-21
Slow Build but Good
Read this for my book club-
I had a hard time getting through the first half- it’s a slow build but towards the end I couldn’t stop listening until I knew what happened.
The twists at the end left my jaw dropped.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
2 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 04-07-21
Interesting
Interesting plot, end has too many loose ends so I’m not sure I like how it concluded
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
2 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Sam-Mom/Teacher
- 11-05-21
If I Disappear
A true crime mystery pod cast leads to murder, but who is the real murderer? It all comes out in the end, but if you are like me you will be left wanting more information.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Kelsey Corazzinj
- 12-20-24
Such a good story
I loved the story
Really suspenseful and intense. You get to know the main character really well.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Anonymous User
- 03-02-21
A Good Hard Look at how we consume true crime
This was a good social commentary story, although it was a struggle to get through it, for me. The narrators tone was very disconnected from the characters, which was disconcerting for me but it does add to the story in the sense that the main character viewed her time in the tale as an immersive true crime experience.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
1 person found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Virginia
- 11-03-21
Inaccurate locations
I got excited to see a book that takes place in my neck of the woods. I used to live in Eureka, and I now work in Yreka, all the while working for the State Highway, so I'm familiar with Happy Camp and everything in between these towns, and there is not just one Hwy between Eureka and Yreka, not even just one road. But it was more disappointing hearing here descriptions of Happy Camp. She modeled it after any generic small town, but Happy Camp is anything but generic.
I'm still going to listen, hoping she gets more sign posts right as it goes, but so far I'm disappointed.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Emily
- 08-02-22
good story
The narrator is excellent! I will recommend this read. I think I would've fallen for Jed too! lol
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Devan Worsham
- 08-06-22
Compelling and smart…until it isn’t
This book took me a while to finish, but that’s because the first few chapters didn’t grab me and I hadn’t listened again until this past week. I thoroughly enjoyed this story, and the author created a mystery light enough to be entertaining, but just deep enough to keep you hooked. I thought I’d figured out the twists and turns, but then I’d be surprised and keep pressing on.
Then, the final act happens and everything careens off the road so quickly, it’s jarring and throws the entire story off. What small mysteries the author laid throughout the story do come together in the end, but there are too many threads left hanging, and the resolution of the story is so disappointing, you’ll wonder why you kept up with it.
The pay off is so unsatisfactory, you’ll want to trade this book in and look for something to scratch that itch you really want. And for a story with such a steady and thought out narrative, it’s unfortunate the author didn’t give the reader enough credit to really stick the landing. It doesn’t leave us wanting more, it leaves us wondering if we really wanted the amount we got in the first place.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Thedrakes
- 02-02-21
I dont even know what I just read
So confusing, unlikable characters, weird story line. I wanted to like it but just couldn't.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!
12 people found this helpful
-
Overall
-
Performance
-
Story
- Laura Em
- 01-25-22
Loved it
This book was not what I expected- it was so much more! It held me til the end and then shocked me again.
Something went wrong. Please try again in a few minutes.
You voted on this review!
You reported this review!