Your Sexually Addicted Spouse
How Partners Can Cope and Heal
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Narrated by:
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Randye Kaye
About this listen
Sexual addictions and compulsive sexual behavior are growing societal problems, with as many as three to six percent of the world population affected. Your Sexually Addicted Partner shatters the stigma and shame that millions of men and women carry when their partners are sexually addicted. They receive little empathy for their pain, which means they suffer alone, often shocked and isolated by the trauma. Barbara Steffens' groundbreaking new research shows that partners are not codependents, but post-traumatic stress victims, while Marsha Means' personal experience provides insights, strategies, and critical steps to recognize, deal with, and heal partners of sexually addicted relationships. Firsthand accounts and stories reveal the impact of this addiction on survivors' lives. Chapters end with "On a Personal Note" questions and propose new paths that lead from trauma to empowerment, health, and hope.
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In this supportive and straightforward guide, Lundy Bancroft, the author of Why Does He Do That?, and communication specialist JAC Patrissi offer a way for women to practically take stock of their relationships and move forward, with or without their partners.
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Paradigm Shift
- By Sydnee Adams-Hancock on 04-08-16
By: Lundy Bancroft, and others
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Loving Your Spouse When You Feel Like Walking Away
- By: Gary Chapman
- Narrated by: Chris Fabry
- Length: 6 hrs and 47 mins
- Unabridged
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When you said, “I do”, you entered marriage with high hopes, dreaming it would be supremely happy. You never intended for it to be miserable. Millions of couples are struggling in desperate marriages. But the story doesn’t have to end there. Dr. Gary Chapman writes, “I believe that in every troubled marriage, one or both partners can take positive steps that have the potential for changing the emotional climate in their marriage.”
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encouragement through another chance
- By Brookley on 09-19-18
By: Gary Chapman
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The Good Karma Divorce
- Avoid Litigation, Turn Negative Emotions into Positive Actions, and Get On with the Rest of Your Life
- By: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
- Narrated by: Judge Michele F. Lowrance
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The average divorce takes two years with a median cost of $30,000. Yet the true cost of divorce is more than time or money; it is the legacy of the decisions made during the process. No matter how long two people have been married, whether there are children or not, divorce often leads to bad choices that can forever alter a family's life. But what if you could reverse the stereotype and move regret-free through this process?
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Thanks for the great advice!
- By Tom Clemente on 11-09-16
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Loving People
- How to Love and Be Loved
- By: John Townsend
- Narrated by: Matthew Josdal
- Length: 7 hrs and 34 mins
- Unabridged
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Best-selling author Dr. John Townsend teaches you that love can actually be learned and gives you the steps and tools to become skilled in love. Using his trademark stories to flesh out the important principles, Dr. Townsend covers receiving love, connecting love, healing love, confronting love, romantic love, and surrendering love. Through his teaching, listeners will discover - and start enjoying - the words, actions, and experiences of authentic love.
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Very insightful
- By Amazon Customer on 05-17-19
By: John Townsend
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Understanding Your Grief
- Ten Essential Touchstones for Finding Hope and Healing Your Heart
- By: Alan D. Wolfelt
- Narrated by: Qarie Marshall
- Length: 5 hrs and 30 mins
- Unabridged
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Explaining the important difference between grief and mourning, this book explores every mourner's need to acknowledge death and embrace the pain of loss. Also explored are the many factors that make each person's grief unique and the many normal thoughts and feelings mourners might have. Questions of spirituality and religion are addressed as well.
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Some of the Most Valuable Resource I Encountered
- By Anonymous User on 09-13-23
By: Alan D. Wolfelt
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12 Stupid Things That Mess Up Recovery
- Avoiding Relapse through Self-Awareness and Right Action
- By: Allen Berger PhD
- Narrated by: Matthew Boston
- Length: 3 hrs and 42 mins
- Unabridged
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To grow in recovery, we must grow up emotionally. This means getting honest with ourselves and facing up to the self-defeating thoughts and actions that put our sobriety at risk. Although there are as many ways to mess up recovery as there are alcoholics and addicts, some general themes exist, which include: confusing self-concern with selfishness; not making amends; using the program to try to become perfect; not getting help for relationship troubles; and believing that life should be easy. Allen Berger explores the 12 most commonly confronted beliefs and attitudes that can sabotage recovery.
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Hilarious and True...the humor helps us to earnestly reflect inward. Very powerful. Thank you!
- By Tabitha Thornhill on 10-25-24
By: Allen Berger PhD
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Post-Romantic Stress Disorder
- What to Do When the Honeymoon Is Over
- By: John Bradshaw
- Narrated by: Joe Barrett
- Length: 5 hrs and 17 mins
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John Bradshaw is arguably the most accomplished and well-known leader alive today in the addictions field. He taught us about functional and dysfunctional families, showed us how shame could become toxic and poisonous to our core selves, and helped us understand and heal the wounded, vulnerable "inner child" conceived by, and thriving in, that environment. In Post-Romantic Stress Disorder (PRSD), Bradshaw gives readers a clear explanation of the difference between falling in love, lust, and true love.
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How do you own the world, how do you own disorder?
- By Derek G. on 01-13-17
By: John Bradshaw
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Addict in the House
- A No-Nonsense Family Guide Through Addiction and Recovery
- By: Robin Barnett EdD LCSW, Darren Kavinoky - foreword
- Narrated by: Denice Stradling
- Length: 6 hrs and 21 mins
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If you’re the family member of an addict, you may feel confused, guilty, and scared of doing the wrong thing. And when you don’t know how to help, you may find yourself in a codependent role. Addict in the House offers a pragmatic, step-by-step guide to dealing with a loved one’s addiction, from accepting the reality of the disease to surviving what may be repeated cycles of recovery and relapse. You’ll learn how to encourage your addicted loved one to get help without forcing it and finally find the strength to let go of codependence.
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was okay.
- By Michelle on 05-02-19
By: Robin Barnett EdD LCSW, and others
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Men's Work
- A Practical Guide to Face Your Darkness, End Self-Sabotage, and Find Freedom
- By: Connor Beaton
- Narrated by: Connor Beaton
- Length: 9 hrs and 27 mins
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In Men’s Work, ManTalks founder Connor Beaton offers the tactical, self-led guide men have been looking for. Here, he destigmatizes inner work by reframing it as a kind of psychological warrior training that many men can relate to and have been craving. Beaton walks you through a framework for facing the hidden and rejected aspects of yourself—factors that lead to self-sabotage, anxiety, and depression.
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From a woman’s perspective
- By NBB on 03-21-23
By: Connor Beaton
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Love Is a Choice
- The Definitive Book on Letting Go of Unhealthy Relationships
- By: Dr. Robert Hemfelt, Dr. Frank Minirth, Dr. Paul Meier
- Narrated by: Christopher Solimene
- Length: 11 hrs and 20 mins
- Unabridged
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In Love Is a Choice, best-selling doctors Robert Hemfelt, Frank Minirth, and Paul Meier walk you through their 10 proven stages to recovery from codependency that results from external circumstances. Humans are susceptible to codependency because of our sinful tendency to use defense mechanisms to fool ourselves. In codependent relationships, deceitful games are played, and important Christian principles are often taken out of context and abused.
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Great book, horrible Performance
- By Jeff on 03-15-18
By: Dr. Robert Hemfelt, and others
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Getting Past Your Past
- Take Control of Your Life With Self-Help Techniques from EMDR Therapy
- By: Francine Shapiro
- Narrated by: Karen White
- Length: 12 hrs and 2 mins
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Whether we've experienced small setbacks or major traumas, we are all influenced by memories and experiences we may not remember or don't fully understand. Getting Past Your Past offers practical procedures that demystify the human condition and empower listeners looking to achieve real change. An easy conversational style, humor, and fascinating real life stories make it simple to understand the brain science behind why we get stuck in various ways and what we can about it.
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NOT ENOUGH ON SOLUTIONS
- By MZHOLLAND on 08-20-12
By: Francine Shapiro
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The Breakup Bible
- The Smart Woman's Guide to Healing from a Breakup or Divorce
- By: Rachel Sussman
- Narrated by: Susan Boyce
- Length: 12 hrs and 6 mins
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Psychotherapist and breakup expert Rachel A. Sussman, LCSW, reveals the secrets every woman needs to get her life back on track. Drawing on hundreds of counseling sessions she's conducted with women at all stages of recovery, Sussman developed a proven three-phase process for healing from a breakup.
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lifesaver!
- By Dawson on 11-30-17
By: Rachel Sussman
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Nice story but missing details
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Great. But too Female Centric
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After a Good Man Cheats
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This audiobook is a practical action plan that will walk you through the first stages after your wife has discovered your infidelity. Learn the tools to fix your marriage. Avoid the (sometimes fatal) mistakes I've seen so many men make.
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Horrible, but with some helpful information
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Sex With a Cheating Person?! NO!
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Nice story but missing details
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Great. But too Female Centric
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Great for Christians, not for the rest of us
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night time bed story
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Treating Trauma from Sexual Betrayal: The Essential Tools for Healing
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What a healing book
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Is my relationship worth saving? Will the trust ever come back? How can things be good between us again? Whether broken trust is due to daily dishonesties, a monumental betrayal, or even a history of hurts from the past, it can put a relationship at risk. This is the first book to show you exactly what to do to restore trust in your relationship, regardless of how it was damaged.
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for betrayed women - not men!
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The Betrayal Bond
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In The Betrayal Bond, Patrick Carnes presents an in-depth study of these relationships, why they form, who is most susceptible, and how they become so powerful. He shows how to recognize when traumatic bonding has occurred and gives a checklist for examining relationships. He then provides steps to safely extricate from these relationships. This is a book you will turn to again and again for inspiration and insight, while professionals will find it an invaluable reference work.
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Punch To The Gut
- By PhlyGerl on 03-13-19
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Transcending Post-Infidelity Stress Disorder
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The phrase "broken heart" belies the real trauma behind the all-too-common occurrence of infidelity. Psychologist Dennis Ortman likens the psychological aftermath of sexual betrayal to post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in its origin and symptoms, including anxiety, irritability, rage, emotional numbing, and flashbacks. Dr. Ortman sees recovery as a spiritual journey and draws on the wisdom of diverse faiths, from Christianity to Buddhism. He also offers exercises to deepen recovery, such as guided meditations and journaling.
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Religious Slant Takes Away from Seriousness
- By Mr. Xtabay on 07-16-20
What listeners say about Your Sexually Addicted Spouse
Average customer ratingsReviews - Please select the tabs below to change the source of reviews.
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- Renita S. Creasy
- 04-14-18
yes!! very insightful and helpful!
makes you feel like someone gets it and can explain the craziness in your life.
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- AG
- 12-10-21
Great book
Great book. Very helpful. A must read for spouses who are in a relationship with a sex addict. Up to date info.
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- Myrco73
- 05-03-17
Amazing explanation of what's a trauma
Helped a lot to understand a trauma based recovery of a sex addict partner. Thanks
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- Antonio C. Inostroza
- 05-09-19
Best book to read if your partner is a sex addict.
Best book to assure YOU ARE NOT CRAZY YOU HAVE BEEN HURT AND DECEIT BY THE PERSON YOU TRUSTED MOST IN YOUR LIFE!
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- JustAsha
- 01-11-20
Finally.
I first encountered sex addiction in 2015 when I came across messages in my husband’s phone from call girls. That uncovered a long, long history of porn and sex addiction. He was not the man I thought I had married. We had three children, and I was in the middle of finishing my bachelors degree. I ended up going into counseling and this therapist concluded (as in actually TOLD me) to separate from my husband. Instead, I decided to think about it some, observe my husband’s “efforts” to seek help — yeah, it was half-hearted attempt to placate me — and in 2016 he unexpectedly DIED.
Now my sex addiction partner grief hot overshadowed by WIDOW grief! This time the PTSD caused me to stop eating, sleeping and caring. I had a lot of support from the community when they heard of my husband’s death.
Fast forward, I am in a new relationship (with a widower no less) and a few months ago he drops a BOMBSHELL on me. He, too, has a sex addiction. Part of me wants to run as far away as possible because I have seen this pain before, part of me is even more lonely than the first time (who will understand that I love him and want to stay?) and part of me feels like alright... now is the time I will actually deal with my trauma. Life is not getting any shorter. My boyfriend is very proactive about getting himself help, and he was the one who admitted to me, unprompted, that he struggles with this.
I begin this new heading with this book. It helps. I continue speaking to my therapist and now bring her a new issue.
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- Lisa G.
- 10-02-19
Very Helpful
Very helpful and informative. The partner of a sex addict should never feel responsible, less than, or ashamed because of their partner's behavior. This behavior is traumatizing and should not be minimized.
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- Nelle nell
- 04-18-17
good guide to how one can begin the steps of jrali
I appreciated the validation of trauma there partner goes through explained in this book and the steps you can take to begin to heal from that trauma
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- HandB19
- 05-08-21
Finally a book which addresses my marriage
This book covered so much of the porn and sexually addicted lifestyle and in a very clear and easy to understand way. I am in a healthy marriage now, but survived 20 years of abuse stemming from my former husband’s sexual addiction.
The only negative I can report was that it seemed to lean more toward the wife staying with her sexually addicted spouse and depending on God to heal him while she stays.
It is the exception and not the rule that your sexually addicted spouse will seek help and turn to God. It was healthier for me and my children to turn him over to his depravity, give him to God, and let him go. Both people have to want to change the marriage; not just one.
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2 people found this helpful
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- Anonymous User
- 11-14-19
Good listen
Gave different views, and a path to start my healing as a victim of addict
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- janine
- 09-13-18
Great
This book was super helpful I just found out last week my husband is a sex addict (chronic masterbation and porn) and it’s been a very painful process and it helps me not feel alone and gave me some great tools
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